Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Moving children across canada

Collapse
This topic is closed.
X
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Moving children across canada

    I have 2 daughters form my previous marriage. I have been with my fiance for almost 3 years now. We have a son together. My fiance is the financial contributer in our family. He has lived and worked out west before. His boss has offered him his job back with great pay, medical and dental plan and many other benifits. We currently are both on EI. He is a foreman/leadhand working in construction and demolition in the mines in BC. He stopped travelling to BC when we got together to provide a stable home for the children. We are not able to put in the kids in any sports/dance, etc. We cannot not afford to do this for them. We do not have a medical dental plan. My ex pays me childsupport at $150 permonth as he makes only $12000/year. We would like to move the children out west so we can provide the children a better quality of living. My ex has said no way! I go back to court on the 9th of December. He sees the children every second weekend with no extra time over the summer or march break. He does take the kids for 4-5 nights over Christmas. I cannot afford a lawyer and we make $300 more a month than legal aid will allow. Any information on what I can do would be great! Thanks

  • #2
    Broken record:

    If your ex oppposes it and plays his cards halfway right (NBDad), you're probably screwed.
    Do a search in this forum on "mobility" and ye shall discover a pile of threads on this topic along with every argument for and against (and lots of anger too).

    Comment


    • #3
      He just so happens to have a friend who is a lawyer who is helping him for FREE!!! I have been doing a lot of research on mobility. It just makes me mad because alot of the time he is suppose to have the kids he waits untill saturday to pick them up and they have a sleepover somewhere on saturday night. I would understand better if he took more interest in them but he doesn't!

      Comment


      • #4
        It sucks if he isn't using all the time he's allowed with them, but your wish to move out west doesn't necessarily trump the children's right to have a relationship with their father.

        IF you were to move, how would you facilitate his relationship with them? Are you willing to cover the cost of plane tickets for them to visit him? Are you willing to give up every Christmas, every March Break and the entire summer?

        Comment


        • #5
          Have you considered..

          Have you considered having the Children's father take custody of the children so that you and your fiancee can move to B.C.?

          That would give you the opportunity to move out west and earn an larger income so that you could ensure your children's well being back in New Brunswick.

          Surely this would allow the children the benefit of a better standard of living while it would also allow the children to stay in the same school, keep the same friends and basically remain in the life they know now.

          The Mysterious Best Interest of the Children Test will work against you moving them across the country.

          Comment


          • #6
            I have told him that YES he can have the children for the summer, march break and christmas vacation!Also, instead of paying child support he can use that to help with the travel expenses and we will cover the rest. And, NO I have not considered leaving the children here in Nova Scotia to live with their father who makes $1000/month. He would not be ablr to put them in any kind of extra curricular activities. I don't see how that is in their best interest! And as far as them not having to switch schools, my oldest would have to switch schools as it is. We do not live in the same county now!

            Comment


            • #7
              Yes, but if you left them with Dad and went out west to make piles of money then you can send him mountains of child support to augment his $12K/yr income.

              That way they will not be uprooted to live in a uncertain environment and they will continue to live where they are familiar.

              Comment


              • #8
                Implied CS...

                I was implying that you would pay CS to help the Children live a better life in Nova Scotia.

                Moving all the way across the country is a heavy burden for adults and children, and creates a situation where most of your relationships become broken and new ones must be formed.

                The Children as best served to have both parents in their lives. However, if one parent chooses to move for economic gain, it does not neccessarily imply the economic gain will offset the other losses in the childrens lives: Family, Friends, Sense of Community, familiarity of home.

                Your in a tough spot, and I meet many people from the maritimes in my part of Alberta who have had to move for a better life.. Alot of dad's and mom's who are away from their kids back east so that they can better support them.

                Here's and out of the box idea: Offer your children's father 50/50 Equal Shared parenting if he moves to B.C. and I bet he will be happy to let you move. If he accepts the kids win a better life with both of their parents still involved and their only losses are the strain of having to form new friendships and establish a new home(s) in the new community.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Also, if I left them with their dad that would be an uncertain environment. Both my girls have been with me. They were both to little when we seperated to remember anything else. How is that in their best interest?

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Sounds like you have it all figured out.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by momwishingmobility View Post
                      I have told him that YES he can have the children for the summer, march break and christmas vacation!Also, instead of paying child support he can use that to help with the travel expenses and we will cover the rest. And, NO I have not considered leaving the children here in Nova Scotia to live with their father who makes $1000/month. He would not be ablr to put them in any kind of extra curricular activities. I don't see how that is in their best interest! And as far as them not having to switch schools, my oldest would have to switch schools as it is. We do not live in the same county now!
                      It seems like you are doing this more for yourself than for the children. You keep harping on how you want the kids in extra curricular activities; how your ex only makes so much a month and only pays so much for child support. Even though he may not be as 'active' a father as YOU want him to be, I do not see how his actions warrant him having his children taken away from him because you feel it will be easier. I'm actually surprised at how hostile you seem towards your ex saying No to you taking them. I mean unless he is abusive, neglective, or unsafe for the children he is doing what is within his means. Yes I will agree he could likely be a little more active in the children's lives but judging from your reaction on here I am also wondering just how much of a chance you are possibly giving him.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by momwishingmobility View Post
                        He would not be ablr to put them in any kind of extra curricular activities. I don't see how that is in their best interest!
                        He would be able to with all the CS you will will pay, especially on section 7 expenses. And if he's only making $12K/year down east he presumably has all kinds of time to commit to them and the extracirricular activities.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          I am not doing this for myself. We(my partner and I) have 4 children between the 2 of us that we are trying to support. we try our hardest to provide for them. We go without so they can have the things they nedd and want. We are not ablt to provide medical and dental for the children. there are some things that are covered by msi but not all. My 4 year old has had numerous surgey's. I have been the one to go with her to the hospital and stay for weeks. It is very heart breaking to tell my kids that they can't take dance or whatever. When I have asked my ex to help pay with them he turns them down. I am sorry if I seem hostile. I am not wanting to do this for me.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            12000 base income + 7700 CCTB (2 kids in NS) + 4700 CS that you would pay him (assuming you make 25K/year) + you having to cover around 67% of any special expenses.

                            Of course he could always go on welfare, make around 700/month from them (1000-300 or so from you) and qualify for government subsidized housing, milk tickets, medical benefits card, transportation, etc.

                            However that's a moot point...there are a ton of programs out there you can look into to help you subsidize children being placed into extra curricular activities. PLUS up to $500/year / child is a tax write off.

                            So sorry, but unless you are trying to register them for things like hockey, "there's no money for extra activities" is a load of crap. Look into places where you'll get a discount for placing all 4 of your kids into the group. (ie. Karate, Judo, Swimming, etc). Lots of those places offer a monthly payment plan that's a little more manageable if you ask.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              There is also volunteer work, may not be dance and things like that but it would get your kids involved and less likely to fret about the things they can't do.
                              I get the need for medical benefits so on that point I would consider what the others have pointed out. It's all a matter of how bad you want it and are willing to bend to get it. In the end though you can't just expect to take your children away from their father.

                              Comment

                              Our Divorce Forums
                              Forums dedicated to helping people all across Canada get through the separation and divorce process, with discussions about legal issues, parenting issues, financial issues and more.
                              Working...
                              X