Hi. I find myself recently thrown into this world. I am 31, my husband is 35 and we have a 4 year old daughter, married for 5 years. We've had our share of fighting over the years. Two weekends ago he went out, stayed out all night long until 2 pm the following day. Finally returned home acting all angry at ME. It has been a longstanding problem, him going out drinking all night. I of course staying at home with our child, I go out maybe once every 6 months. I was so fed up I left for the night to sleep at my mother's home. The following day I returned and when he came home from work he said "I'm leaving. I don't love you anymore.' The end. LEFT. I told him he didn't have to go, he could stay here, he said nothing could make him change his mind. Fast forward a week. Came over to tell me, right in front of our child about his NEW girlfriend! Says it's only been going on about a week, so not 'while we were still married.' I said to him, WE ARE still married and as far as I know this still counts as adultery. Our daughter was traumatized by his sudden departure from the family and she would wail at night for Daddy, which hurt me SO terribly, and he accused me of making her feel that way. I have been a stay at home mother for the majority of the time except for the last year I worked part time unti lI hurt my back, and my doctor and I were working on filing a disability claim for herniated discs. He makes between 60-80 000 a year during our marriage and acted like he could not support the family. Now he is going to a lawyer and filing for divorce, he says. He just wants to move on all in a big rush. I have an appt. with FLIC on June 9th. I'm so curious as to what his lawyer could say. 'Um, I walked out on my wife and kid and I'm having an affair.' ??? I told him the only way to speed up things would be to admit to the adultery or else a years separation is the only way to go. It's like he has lost his mind. We both have known that we haven't been happy for the last couple of years, but I was not at all prepared for this sudden jumping ship/girlfriend/I don't love you insanity. I'm at the house, he moved to his sisters basement. (She has 2 kids & also getting a divorce.) I made copies of all the bank records etc today and could see he's been wining and dining the new chick at the Keg, bars etc. while I am here taking care of our kid alone. It's so deplorable! He said "You can have the house,' the thing is, he's really not all that bright, he knows nothing about how any of this works! Financially we are broke, negative equity in the house, stupid brand new leased car,
Up til 2 weeks ago we were talking about painting the house, making love, watching telly together in the evenings chatting about the day. Then BLAM!
As much as I don't want this to be happening, he is being such a total and complete freakish stranger to me, I would never take him back. It feels as final as a death, he's killed it. Wow. He was very smug and pleased when he told me about 'Tina' who by the way is also married. I'm so grossed out.
And as far as parenting is concerned, he barely lifted a finger. Never changed a diaper, never gave her a bath, never put her to bed, worked 7 days a week 12 hours a day then out to party! I am quite business savvy so that is all I can hold on to, I just can't believe that our love turned to such poison and it's just the tip of the iceberg! Any thoughts, help, reassurance, legal tips?
Up til 2 weeks ago we were talking about painting the house, making love, watching telly together in the evenings chatting about the day. Then BLAM!
As much as I don't want this to be happening, he is being such a total and complete freakish stranger to me, I would never take him back. It feels as final as a death, he's killed it. Wow. He was very smug and pleased when he told me about 'Tina' who by the way is also married. I'm so grossed out.
And as far as parenting is concerned, he barely lifted a finger. Never changed a diaper, never gave her a bath, never put her to bed, worked 7 days a week 12 hours a day then out to party! I am quite business savvy so that is all I can hold on to, I just can't believe that our love turned to such poison and it's just the tip of the iceberg! Any thoughts, help, reassurance, legal tips?
Comment