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kate331 · #1 07-26-2020, 08:02 PM

Like many parents I am concerned about sending my children back to school this fall. What happens in a Joint Custody situation if one parent wants to keep the children home and the other parent wants them back in school?

Is anyone here concerned about returning your children to school this September?

What are you doing re homeschooling between two homes?

Any advice much appreciated.

Janus · #2 07-26-2020, 08:21 PM

I fully intend to send my kids to school in September if that is an option. There are some serious mental health issues with continuing to keep children at home. I also happen to believe in education and I'm not a huge fan of my children losing these years. It is so much easier to learn when you are younger.

Missing school provides no direct benefits to the children involved, since the incidence rate for school age children is a rounding error away from zero.

If a parent is worried about their personal risk, it seems reasonable to me that the other parent can take 100% custody until the pandemic has passed. Let the at-risk parent stay safe and alone at home.

tilt · #3 07-26-2020, 08:29 PM

Ugh what an awful sitution to be in. It depends on your relationship with your co-parent, this is one situation where there isn�t really a compromise. I suspect that if schools are fully opened then judges would be reluctant to agree on homeschooling unless there is compelling medical reasons or a prior history of homeschooling (Judges near KW tend to be more Supportive of homeschooling as it is so much more common there - weigh that if you are considering filing a motion).

Mine are not going, but I have homeschooled before and I have final sole decision-making and 100% residency. I am still engaging my co-parent in conversations though, so that I will have their buy-in.

How would homeschooling work in your situation? Do you share time during the week when either of you are using school as childcare (no judgement, we have to put the little buggers somewhere). Or would one of you be able to take on the homeschooling hours and the reluctant parent doesn�t have it impact on their amount of time with the child? Would you be willing to drop child support to a lower level if the other parent agreed to homeschooling (assuming money is something that bugs them). Can you decide to share parenting time so they have all their �prime� hours (like evenings or weekends)?

If they are reluctant, explore what will happen if the school is shut down (and I am sure they will). Even be cheeky and double check with them that they have their life insurance in case the child gives them covid. Basically, try to find a win-win, listen to their objections. Take some time to think about what they are saying and ask to pick up the conversation in a couple of days and see if you can address any of their concerns.

kate331 · #4 07-26-2020, 09:24 PM

Shared parenting time didn't work out for me

. But I did agree to Joint Custody to keep the peace, my ex was adamant he wanted equal decision making, but unfortunately not equal parenting time. Child support is non existence since the ex is on CERB, I am still working, but from home most of the time.

I just dont want to expose the children to COVID and am worried about a second wave.

No experience in homeschooling but I have been doing the best I can since March. I have also enrolled the children in Oxford Learning 2 times a week, for additional support. I have more confidence in their control environment, re cleaning and one student at a time.

I don't believe I am at risk currently, but who knows what the long term efforts are.

Thanks so much for your inputs.

Janus · #5 07-26-2020, 09:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kate331

I just dont want to expose the children to COVID

Are you worried about yourself or are you worried about your kids?

tilt · #6 07-26-2020, 10:07 PM

Eh, if it doesn�t impact their parenting time and they have choosen to be a part-time parent with no financial contribution I don�t think a judge would weigh their opinion too heavily. Child Support on CERB is, at a minimum, $192 for one child, so if they aren�t paying it doesn�t look good that they already are disregarding the child�s best interest and are putting their financial needs ahead of their child�s. Getting their buy-in is a good idea, so do try, but I think you should feel confident that as long as you can make an argument that homeschooling is in the best interest of the child and their parenting time won�t be impacted (and can be increased! Offer them extra time in writing!) then you are more likely to win a motion they file.

That being said, he would be unlikely to get a motion date before September as the Superior Courts are booking the dates cancelled back in March for September and October in my area. There will be a ruling mid-August on this issue (probably from Pazaratz lol) that will set the tone for all other decisions. Unless your co-parent is willing to pick the child up every morning and bring them to school there isn�t a lot they can do except complain about your choice to homeschool.

I would hold off on sharing that info until closer to September though. Things may change that make this discussion a moot point.

tilt · #7 07-26-2020, 10:10 PM

Oh, I just saw you have plural children - in that case the child support should be $363 for two children that your co-parent is choosing to not pay.

kate331 · #8 07-26-2020, 10:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Janus

Are you worried about yourself or are you worried about your kids?

The kids. And them exposing "our bubble" which includes myself. Our bubble also includes my ex, which I am assuming is following the Government protocols.

kate331 · #9 07-26-2020, 10:58 PM

Thanks for your input Tilt, at the beginning of COVID, I did ask my ex for a 50/50 regime, as that would have helped me, as I was fortunate enough to be employed. In all honesty I would have taken a temporary access switch, where my ex being unemployed could have taken the kids, and I would be the every other weekend parent.

From my understanding with FRO, they are not enforcing child support orders currently, and wont garnish CERB.

tilt · #10 07-26-2020, 11:11 PM

Yes FRO has suspended enforcement and won�t garnish CERB, and knowing that has shown which parents will still step up and support their kids and which ones will take advantage of the situation to their benefit. That is exactly the type of information Judges look for when deciding motions.

Seeing as your co-parent has really shown their true colours here in not taking advantage of additional time, I think you can assume you will be homeschooling in sept. Sorry things are so tough right now, at least the kids have had extra time with a parent that cares for them.

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