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My offer to settle being used against me in opposing affidavit?

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  • My offer to settle being used against me in opposing affidavit?

    So my daughter's counsellor and the association she works through (a child psychologist, and an aboriginal elder, child and youth workers, and counsellors) wrote a letter to support my custody and access. They wrote that mom's statements made by them are false, that they have no disclosure of abuse, that they support my home, and that after their work with mom, dad, step mom, and child, they recommend that the current access schedule stay in place, but that dad have sole responsibility, also limits on access during school year as mom has provided child late or withheld her every school day she has been custodial parent since January.

    I have been making offers to settle but in mom's affidavit she tries to use the offers against me saying that it show I am trying to work with her and therefor we should have shared custody (to be clear I did make offers that expanded current access but not to a shared school year, a shared holiday schedule, and 4 non consecutive weeks in summer to mom) But in every offer I said sole as the situation is not working. She is making false claims on what the offers I am making are. With provisions about child attending school, camp, and therapy.

    She became very upset crying at the counsellors and making a big deal. I would like to send her an offer again as now that she has the professionals opinions she may be more willing to work out a deal....but am I just giving her more ammunition to say that we should have shared custody and joint decision making?

  • #2
    Your offers should have the heading without prejudice and ideally some paragraph that the offer is to settle and not to be discussed in court.

    This is probably one of the rare times you have the statements referring to those out of court discussions struck from the record.

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    • #3
      It's a big no no to even whisper offer details in any court document or appearance. That has been done in bad faith...I'd raise a stink.

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      • #4
        I would say a judge would interpret your offers as that you are the parent that is trying to encourage a bond with the other parent.

        This is in your favor actually. What you need to focus is mom not taking the child to school. The counselor letter is strong as it provides a professional and neutral party recommendation. This won't be a deciding factor but definitely strengthens your case that you are the more fit to take care of child full time.

        Again, focus on the best interest of the child. That is all the judge cares about. Ignore the false claims.

        Originally posted by Dadx5 View Post
        So my daughter's counsellor and the association she works through (a child psychologist, and an aboriginal elder, child and youth workers, and counsellors) wrote a letter to support my custody and access. They wrote that mom's statements made by them are false, that they have no disclosure of abuse, that they support my home, and that after their work with mom, dad, step mom, and child, they recommend that the current access schedule stay in place, but that dad have sole responsibility, also limits on access during school year as mom has provided child late or withheld her every school day she has been custodial parent since January.

        I have been making offers to settle but in mom's affidavit she tries to use the offers against me saying that it show I am trying to work with her and therefor we should have shared custody (to be clear I did make offers that expanded current access but not to a shared school year, a shared holiday schedule, and 4 non consecutive weeks in summer to mom) But in every offer I said sole as the situation is not working. She is making false claims on what the offers I am making are. With provisions about child attending school, camp, and therapy.

        but am I just giving her more ammunition to say that we should have shared custody and joint decision making?

        Comment

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