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  • common law separation

    A friend of mine is faced with a common law separation from his partner of 20 years. His farm was paid off when he and his first wife divorced so he mortgaged it to give her half. When he and his new common law partner decided to live together the ex-wife offered him custody of the children for more money. The new partner agreed to use her 100,000 from her divorce and put it on the farm as a second mortgage (her being the lender). This ensured her money if things didn't work out. It was agreed he would never make a payment on that mortgage and only his name is on the title of the farm. They both work, raised his children (empty nesters now) he has always made all the payments on the first mortgage and they share the household bills (mostly paid by him as he has the higher income) He expects in a separation to give her half the equity but she says she has talked to a lawyer and he has to pay her back the 100,000 plus the interests over the past 20 years, and support leaving him with zero assets. Can this be so?

  • #2
    okay first off was there an agreement written up between him and wife number two?? One that would spell out the terms of the loan including repayment and interest?

    Minimum he has to pay her back the $100,000 as it was used to "pay off" the first wife in exchange for custody of the kids.

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    • #3
      It was set up as a proper private second mortgage on the farm with interest and payments with her as the lender but the understanding between them that no payments would actually be made it just gave her a legal interest in the farm to recoup her money if things didn't work out between them but they never changed the arrangment. Now she is telling him she is entitled to the 100,000, 20 years of interest on that 100,000 and half the equity in the farm which totalled is all the equity in the farm leaving him with his work pension minus support to her since she makes less money than him. Somehow this doesn't seem fair. He's paid this farm off twice other than her 100,000 dollar investment.

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      • #4
        If she wants to keep everything separate, then rightfully he should pay for this $100K loan from her with interest, and she should pay for 20 years of rent, and of course she gets none of the equity in his farm.

        The better solution is to decide how much each of them had when they started, minus that from their total equity (paying to each of them what they put in - her 100k, him the equity of his farm at the time they go together) and then divide the rest 50/50. This unfair to the person who came into the relationship with more because the other benifitted from the greater growth that the others equity provided them, but hey, that is marriage...

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        • #5
          I agree. She can't have her cake and eat it too. It's either a business arrangement or a marriage. I was just concerned about the legalities of her holding that second mortgage.

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          • #6
            Thanks for the input. I went through my own divorce nightmares 14 years ago and have stayed single ever since. Reading some of these posts makes you more than a little trepiditious about entering into any sort of long term committment. That doesn't seem right. Thanks again.

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            • #7
              Originally posted by concernedfriend1234 View Post
              Thanks for the input. I went through my own divorce nightmares 14 years ago and have stayed single ever since. Reading some of these posts makes you more than a little trepiditious about entering into any sort of long term committment. That doesn't seem right. Thanks again.
              Amen to that.

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