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What should I expect if this goes to court?

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  • What should I expect if this goes to court?

    My ex and I split up a few months ago. She is now threatening to take this to court, when I have asked her to settle outside of court and she refuses to send me a list of what she would like from the posessions. Currently I still have most of the possessions that didnt belong to her directly including the appliances, electronics, furniture etc.

    We lived together for about 4 years total.

    First question.. Is common-law retroactive? By that, I mean is common-law effective from day 1 after we have been living together for 3 years, or is common-law effective only AFTER the third year ends?

    Secondly, her income was much much lower than mine, I have proof of this by tax records. When i was not at work (on my days off, and after shifts), we split the chores with my son evenly, as well as most of the housecleaning. During my time of unemployment, we split all the chores basically in half. I still made about 3-4 times as much as her.

    Her average pay was in the area of $300 biweekly, my average pay was in the neighbourhood of $1100 after taxes, and union dues. This does not include overtime which I FREQUENTLY completed.

    A number of semi-major purchases were made together including a 42inch tv ($1700), fridge, washer, dryer (500, 700, 400, respectively), bed ($1500). I financed a vehicle as well after about 2 years of being together, the monthly payment is $250. Insurance on the vehicle was about $140/month.

    $1000 of the TV, and about $1000 of the bed were placed on my line of credit, which was/is solely under my name, she had no access.

    The bed, washer and dryer were bought on an account featuring both of our names. The TV was purchased on an account featuring solely my name.

    We both have laptops, both purchased on an account under my name.

    The couch and armchair were gifts to myself from my parents, as well as my stove. My sons bedroom set is mine from before the relationship. The dishwasher I got for free and self-refurbished.

    What should I expect here?

    If she takes the tv, does she have to pay the $1000 that I had to put on my line of credit.

    Im just not sure what to expect...

  • #2
    What does she want?

    What do you want?

    Comment


    • #3
      Thanks for the reply!

      she gave me a rough draft of something when we first seperated, but she accidentally dropped a paper the other day and I saw it..

      list 1:

      bed
      washer
      dryer
      all of my sons stuff including toys, clothes, stored baby clothes, his (my old) bedroom set
      couch
      armchair

      list 2

      bed
      washer
      dryer
      all of my sons stuff (same as above)
      couch
      armchair
      42inch tv

      I want to be fair about the seperation, I do not want to screw her over by denying her anything, but at the same time I know she is out to screw me over in any and every way possible.

      My income as stated in my previous post was AT LEAST 3x that of hers. She had one job since my son was born and that hardly paid, she stayed at home with my son while I was at work, and I did the same while she was at work. She was then laid off and eventually found another job. Our schedules conflicted often so my son was brought to daycare.

      the van is under my name, she wouldnt even try to obtain that because its only half paid, and she has no licence. the stove was a xmas gift to me from my parents. The couch and armchair were gifts from my parents, but they didnt actually specify who they were giving them to, so I assume us together.

      I dont want to have a claim of unjust enrichment against me, but I need to prepare for it because I think thats what she will do. How should I defend in such a case, and in your opinion how do you think the court would rule?

      Comment


      • #4
        Is the child your son together or a child from a previous relationship?
        Is there another parent paying support for this child?

        If the child is not biological yours - you could still be held liable for child support.

        If I were in the situation I would give her the itmes in list 1 minus one bed for yourself and call it a day. It would probably be much cheaper to give those items than argue about it in court and pay a lawyer bigs bucks.

        Honestly if she's unlikely to get legal aid she probably wouldn't hire a lawyer,you could always call her bluff and offer her less. Your decison.


        all of those items are easily replaced. Doesn't have to be new, check out local used websites. I wouldn't want to see a child go without so pass along the bedroom set that you had as a child.

        mominont

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by mominont View Post
          Is the child your son together or a child from a previous relationship?
          Is there another parent paying support for this child?

          If the child is not biological yours - you could still be held liable for child support.

          If I were in the situation I would give her the itmes in list 1 minus one bed for yourself and call it a day. It would probably be much cheaper to give those items than argue about it in court and pay a lawyer bigs bucks.

          Honestly if she's unlikely to get legal aid she probably wouldn't hire a lawyer,you could always call her bluff and offer her less. Your decison.


          all of those items are easily replaced. Doesn't have to be new, check out local used websites. I wouldn't want to see a child go without so pass along the bedroom set that you had as a child.

          mominont
          thanks for the reply.

          she already has legal aid/lawyer, and I dont qualify for one unfortunately.

          I am the biological father of the child. If she seeks full custody I dont think that will happen as she was recently (within a week) charged with assault. The child and I were present, I was not charged as I did nothing wrong. She assaulted my current girlfriend who defended herself and was also charged. As far as I know they both have intentions to fight the charges.

          This wont look good for her in court, so if she seeks sole custody I will also do the same and fight it. I wont be seeking child support from her however.

          If I give her the TV, since its under my name solely and I paid it using my line of credit, should I expect her to pay the balance I put on my line of credit? I have the receipt for the TV as proof its under my name.

          If I give her everything she is asking for, I wont have any furniture left, except for a kitchen table and a bedset. Since I intend on having my son in my life, and since his bedroom set is still technically mine, I dont see a reason/need to give that to her as I had it for about 3 years before I met her. I was still living at my parents when I got that.

          I want to be fair but I also consider that she hardly put any money into the household, and the chores were evenly split (she is lazy so when I came home from work I had to cook supper and clean as well. The only thing she did consistently was basically laundry, I swept and mopped, I cleaned the bathroom, the kitchen counters, we split the chores for my son being diaper changes, baths etc.

          She already has her computer desk, her laptop, all her personal possessions, lots of clothes for my son, toys. We always rented, so we have no house or whatnot together.

          If this goes to court I cannot afford a lawyer and will act as my own. This is why I am informing myself now.

          Comment


          • #6
            please anyone have an idea on how this would go in court? She is supposed to give me a list on wednesday, a final draft. I saw a partial list yesterday and it seems reasonable, but she also said she wasnt finished so I am preparing.

            Comment


            • #7
              what sort of custody arrangements are you seeking? If you are planning on shared custody then you will need that bed for your child. It makes sense that you retain it, since it was yours to begin with.

              I think if you can divide the household things to be 50% yours and 50% hers it will be fair. Things like washers and dryers should not be split up (if you are renting you don't really need the appliances) You can get great deals on things you need through classified websites, so don't worry about "giving in".

              I know someone who just separated from a CL relationship. It was treated (at court) as if they were married. All debts obtained over the time they lived together (with children) were split 50/50. So keep those bills for the household contents handy. I hope you can work out something reasonable though.

              Comment


              • #8
                I was seeking shared custody with equal parenting time. The mother isnt sure about that but I told her that with her recent assault charge she might have a hard time going against me in court and suggested that we just agree on shared custody. I do NOT want to remove her from his life, but on the other side I do not want to be removed either.

                I dont mind splitting things 50/50 so long as the bills get split that way as well. In my opinion for me to give her 50 percent of the items yet still have to pay for those items is 'unjust enrichment' on her part... I am hoping that if things are divided evenly, so will the bills, because my line of credit was at close to $3000 used when we split.

                Comment

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