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acknowledging Valentines Day - do children of divorce love differently?

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  • acknowledging Valentines Day - do children of divorce love differently?

    I'm not sure where the Huffington Post obtains statistics, so take the article with a grain of salt. I am a child of divorce, am interested in hearing your views on this one:

    13 Ways Children of Divorce Deal Differently with Love
    Start a discussion, not a fire. Post with kindness.

  • #2
    acknowledging Valentines Day - do children of divorce love differently?

    Im a child of divorce and a child of messed up parents (who messed us up in return). I have several other siblings and we all approach love differently based on our survival of the divorce. None of these items on this list ring true for any of us. Not my sibling who never wanted their spouse to leave them, not my sibling with low self esteem, not my sibling who cared for my mother, not me. Although I would argue that children of divorce try harder to approach things differently and are able to see the forest for the trees so to speak.

    My partner is divorced and still very damaged. We treat valentines day for what it is, another commercial "holiday" that sells cards and make people feel bad for not doing enough. I think the whole day has gotten out of hand. Every day should be a day where you express your love for your significant other. And you shouldnt need to buy something to prove it!

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    • #3
      It feels good to be able to openly teach my kids about how corporations exploit sentiment to make you buy stuff - my smart-ass son responded "that's why you're divorced" (though he and my daughter seem to agree with me anyways)

      Hopefully, by time i am done my kids will break out of the matrix and save the sheep...

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      • #4
        Morning;

        Re; the article

        Have taught thousands of kids, I would definitely say, the vast majority of kids that have gone through divorce/seperation, are a bit off. Some are more quiet, some have a definite edge to them ....something. Obviously, non scientific but just my findings. Kind of sad..... Will they be o.k. in their twenties, that I don't know but in their teens....they have gone through a bit too much emotionally.

        The other thing, I am noticing, when parent teacher interviews take place, the mom and dad are there as well as the boyfriend/girlfriend. I used to get blown away by it but have grown more used to it.

        Lastly, communication with the parents is at times interesting, as the one parent doesn't know what the other parent is emailing the teacher about.

        Personally, once I kind of figure out they parents are split, I try my best to take the time to send a positive note about their child. More often than not, they show the child and they come in smiley faced.

        Moreover, on things like Valentines day, Father's day, Mother's day, I try and get the kids to make two things so the parent isn't left out.

        Everyone, Have a great Family Day

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        • #5
          Some people would have you believe that divorce has no impact on kids.

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          • #6
            I think divorce and separation are one of many significant events that could shape a child's (or adult's) life. Others are abuse, financial instability, death of close ones, and the list goes on.

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            • #7
              sorry wrong post

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