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  • #61
    Good grief, I can assure you that you and Mr.T have more of a relationship than I do with any poster here.

    Are you suggesting that if an allegation of abuse has been made in a file, unsupervised access with a child should recommence and no further investigation is warranted? Or are you suggesting unsupervised access should recommence between an alleged perpetrator and a child, while an assessment is ongoing? Understand, I don't know you, don't know your situation and am not attacking you - I am commenting on a generic situation.

    Originally posted by LovingFather32 View Post

    I think that when you mcDreamy, tayken, stripes all come on at once telling me what's wrong with me, the thread, etc that he sticks up for me.
    I think that when one starts a thread sharing their thoughts on the 'process', they should be prepared for some feedback.
    Start a discussion, not a fire. Post with kindness.

    Comment


    • #62
      yes Ms. McDreamy..it's an allegation

      Should everybody MAKE allegations?

      first allegation wins?

      sad

      Comment


      • #63
        Unfortunately, allegations of child abuse, particularly child sexual abuse, are one situation where the accused is considered guilty until proven innocent instead of the other way around. It's a protection of the child thing. LF's ex has unfortunately finally found the way to end all access until trial. Unless a supervised access centre gets involved.

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        • #64
          When I'm bored I help women along with men.

          I'm fair

          The ignored aren't

          Jeff has weeds he needs to trim

          Comment


          • #65
            Oh No, Its A Conspiracy!
            Start a discussion, not a fire. Post with kindness.

            Comment


            • #66
              Yes it is.

              Comment


              • #67
                LF32 has lived/is living through a total nightmare. I believe this case started as parental child abduction and now his ex is aided and abetted by the legal aid lawyer. I'm not a lawyer but my interpretation of things is that it is against the law to take a child without the other parent's permission. I don't recall reading any post of LF32's where he states, emphatically, that he knows where his daughter is. In fact I believe he has stated, repeatedly, that he does not know where his daughter is. He merely has postulated that she is at the grandparent's home. Same thing as when a parent takes a kid to another country - it is postulated that the abducting parent takes the child to relatives in the other country. This is parental child abduction in my opinion.


                I thank you for sharing your thoughts and view with us LF32. It's an entirely different thing to read about this through the sanitized cases on CanLii.

                People should be held accountable for making false accusations. I do hope that the judge is learned and puts things in place to deter your ex from pulling any more stunts (legal or otherwise). I am hopeful that the motion hearing will be favorable and address the issues that you've been faced with so far.

                You certainly don't need to prove anything to anyone on this forum. Anyone with half a brain, and who has children, would surely empathize with what you are going through.

                Hang in there. You do have a cheering squad here whether you want one or not.

                Comment


                • #68
                  I'm taken back by some of the posts tonight on this thread. The accusations of the OP being anxious etc. For instance - if he wasn't anxious given his situation with daughter I'd be more concerned!

                  It's a forum. People come her for many reasons, one of which is to connect and communicate to and with others. While Tayken states the OP has over indulged with his hundreds of posts (about a very real and sensitive subject - his child he can't see and is being accused of abusing...), Tayken himself posts hundreds of posts and hangs out in courthouses to sit in on others miseries for no apparent reason - ummmm, who's worried about who's mental health and how they spend their time? lol

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                  • #69
                    Originally posted by standing on the sidelines View Post
                    Too bad Mrt doesn't want you to hear other points of views. When others post he takes to the name calling etc. Why is he so scared for you to hear other points of view? Maybe its time for you to tell him that you like to hear other points of views and to stop with the name calling etc, that it isn't productive?
                    LMFAO.... The things people say in sandboxes are so funny sometimes.

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                    • #70
                      Serene, that's a brilliant observation. Too bad that you're probably already on Tayken's ignore list. I earned that honour earlier today.

                      I too was aghast at the comments about LF32 being supposedly anxious and unstable. Clearly, if he were much more jovial and laid back about the process, he would be demonstrating a much more superior command of his faculties than the average bear. Why, let's just ask Robin Williams how well that works...

                      Oh, too soon, haters? Too bad. LF32 is venting all of the poison in his life into an anonymous forum, and getting a mountain of advice that he both asked for and is selectively utilizing. He has good days and bad days, but he certainly isn't trying to mask any pain or bottle anything up. He is managing his situation admirably, confronting the matter head-on. I would be more worried if he suddenly disengaged and curled up into a ball.

                      Sadly, most of the stuff poured into this forum today can hardly be considered constructive advice. So many posters are assuming that because this is still going on, and he's still talking about it, that he must be doing something wrong. Or, because he is seeking help, that he must have a problem. Or, because us cheerleaders are including words of encouragement along with constructive advice, that we are something acting as negative advocates.

                      Comment


                      • #71
                        I am having a hard time with Tayken's stance of late as it suggests the OP should cease posting when he has a need to vent or bounce ideas off of others. But then Tayken sucks and blows by posting "just because". As I have yet to see Tayken have a need so much, rather he is just there/here for commentary and canlii quotes.

                        Perhaps we have failed to see the obvious I long before we can get in front if a judge that will make a decision, we court goers have to endure months of legal bull shit and accusations.... in those times, many of us come here to keep sane.

                        Tayken - for someone who postulates themself as a "resolution seeker" - you come across very antagonistic. And your posts expose your own truisms.

                        You can extrapolate that the OP rightfully or wrongfully had his child "abducted". Fact is, it doesn't change a damn thing. He wants a meaningful role in his daughters life and has been denied that RIGHT. And if a father doesn't have a RIGHT to love his kid - then who has any rights?

                        Jeeesh, I'm all wound up lol. I'm wondering what moral ground you stand on to be looking down at us common folk as you do. As I have yet to see a post that puts you in the hot seat begging to see your kids and keep a roof over your head I'm going to assume you haven't been through the ringer yet/at all. Perhaps you lack the insight to the fear and emotion some of us go through when we can't see our children. Because cutting and pasting canlii caselaw just doesn't equate.

                        Comment


                        • #72
                          Originally posted by Straittohell View Post
                          Oh, too soon, haters? Too bad. LF32 is venting all of the poison in his life into an anonymous forum, and getting a mountain of advice that he both asked for and is selectively utilizing. He has good days and bad days, but he certainly isn't trying to mask any pain or bottle anything up. He is managing his situation admirably, confronting the matter head-on. I would be more worried if he suddenly disengaged and curled up into a ball.

                          Sadly, most of the stuff poured into this forum today can hardly be considered constructive advice. So many posters are assuming that because this is still going on, and he's still talking about it, that he must be doing something wrong. Or, because he is seeking help, that he must have a problem. Or, because us cheerleaders are including words of encouragement along with constructive advice, that we are something acting as negative advocates.
                          I think LF32 should be encouraged. From the bits and pieces I've read, he is doing an excellent job keeping his sh!t together under extremely trying circumstances which would make many people lose their minds altogether. He is a great model of persistence and dedication to his child, as well as a very quick learner. I'm pulling for him.

                          But I think that cheerleading becomes less helpful when it creates or feeds a worldview that sees the other side as purely evil - the now-ex mother in law, the OCL, the people who work at the women's shelter, etc.

                          This kind of us vs them thinking leads to emotional reasoning, which leads nowhere good. I think many of us on this board, including me, have been guilty of this kind of emotional reasoning when it comes to dealing with our exes, so perhaps we can recognize it when we see other people getting sucked into the seductive pull of strong emotions.

                          Comment


                          • #73
                            Originally posted by stripes View Post
                            I think LF32 should be encouraged. From the bits and pieces I've read, he is doing an excellent job keeping his sh!t together under extremely trying circumstances which would make many people lose their minds altogether. He is a great model of persistence and dedication to his child, as well as a very quick learner. I'm pulling for him.

                            But I think that cheerleading becomes less helpful when it creates or feeds a worldview that sees the other side as purely evil - the now-ex mother in law, the OCL, the people who work at the women's shelter, etc.

                            This kind of us vs them thinking leads to emotional reasoning, which leads nowhere good. I think many of us on this board, including me, have been guilty of this kind of emotional reasoning when it comes to dealing with our exes, so perhaps we can recognize it when we see other people getting sucked into the seductive pull of strong emotions.
                            Exactly, and the best way to help anyone on here is to give accurate info whenever possible. Those of us who are less knowledgeable in such matters (moi) give tea and sympathy because there are days when that helps just as much... Let's face it, divorce is one of the most painful experiences that any of us will face in our lives, so it let's try to be kind to each other?

                            As for Tayken, say what you will he/she knows his case law and has impeccable taste in music and books!

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                            • #74
                              Originally posted by MrToronto View Post
                              When I'm bored I help women along with men.

                              I'm fair

                              The ignored aren't

                              Jeff has weeds he needs to trim
                              "name" has weeds to trim

                              Comment


                              • #75
                                Originally posted by LovingFather32 View Post
                                I have no issue with you. I don't think you have secret meetings..just that you enjoy each others company .. nothing wrong with that. Do you agree with mcdreamy? That I still should have supervised access? After no police, (ever), 3 months not seeing D3, 4 months successful supervised visits, etc? Drug tests, alcohol tests, work with children daily...

                                Do you agree with McDreamy?
                                I think that you got shafted in all honesty. There were no reasons for supervised to begin with.

                                Comment

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