Well everyone, I had the OCL disclosure meeting today.
I basically got what I wanted but I just have to wait 3 months for it.
As many of you know I am seeking unsupervised, extended and holiday access with my daughter. Access was supervised in the first place because of a drug problem I had. I have now been clean and sober for almost 20 months. My daughter has never been alone with me, never been to my home and never been with me under the supervision of someone other than my ex, her mother, or recently, the staff at a Supervised Access Center. She is 7 yrs old.
Today the OCL recommended that my access remain supervised for a period of three months. The file will remain open for this period. The immediate change is that the access will now take place in MY HOME (Yayyy!) supervised by my parents who are retired and live about a 10 minute drive away. After 3 months, the same OCL guy will re-assess the situation and if everything goes as it has been going, unsupervised, EOW and split of holidays will follow.
The OCL praised my being clean and sober for more than a year and a half. However, given how powerfully addictive crystal meth (the drug I used) is, he would feel more confortable if we see how the 3 months goes first.
He also gave me independent direct access to my daughter's school and medical information and that I be allowed to attend parent-eacher meetings.
My ex was pissed as hell. I mean she was almost crying she was so upset - and for what? because I get a typical access regime of EOW and split holidays??? C'mon lady, do you hate me that much? Get over yourself. My God.
Anyways, we'll be sending her an Offer that reproduces the OCL recommendations. I do not believe she'll accept. I don't know what happens in the event she doesn't want to follow the recommendations.
All in all, I feel good. I have been through alot to get clean and sober and I have worked hard to build a new life as a responsible adult. I think the 3 month waiting period is just fine with me. I can appreciate the investigator's concerns given my drug history and if he thinks that 3 more months is what it takes for him to be comfortable, then I accept that proudly.
At least my daughter will finally get to be with me in my own home which something I've wanted her see for years. And I'll have supervisors (my parents) that won't be so biased against me.
BTW, the Access Center observation reports helped me a great deal. The OCL read all of them since February and he said not a single report disclosed anything other than a loving, affectionate and attentive relationship with me and my little girl.
I know there's a ways to go yet, but I'm happy about this OCL investigation.
Thanks everyone!
I basically got what I wanted but I just have to wait 3 months for it.
As many of you know I am seeking unsupervised, extended and holiday access with my daughter. Access was supervised in the first place because of a drug problem I had. I have now been clean and sober for almost 20 months. My daughter has never been alone with me, never been to my home and never been with me under the supervision of someone other than my ex, her mother, or recently, the staff at a Supervised Access Center. She is 7 yrs old.
Today the OCL recommended that my access remain supervised for a period of three months. The file will remain open for this period. The immediate change is that the access will now take place in MY HOME (Yayyy!) supervised by my parents who are retired and live about a 10 minute drive away. After 3 months, the same OCL guy will re-assess the situation and if everything goes as it has been going, unsupervised, EOW and split of holidays will follow.
The OCL praised my being clean and sober for more than a year and a half. However, given how powerfully addictive crystal meth (the drug I used) is, he would feel more confortable if we see how the 3 months goes first.
He also gave me independent direct access to my daughter's school and medical information and that I be allowed to attend parent-eacher meetings.
My ex was pissed as hell. I mean she was almost crying she was so upset - and for what? because I get a typical access regime of EOW and split holidays??? C'mon lady, do you hate me that much? Get over yourself. My God.
Anyways, we'll be sending her an Offer that reproduces the OCL recommendations. I do not believe she'll accept. I don't know what happens in the event she doesn't want to follow the recommendations.
All in all, I feel good. I have been through alot to get clean and sober and I have worked hard to build a new life as a responsible adult. I think the 3 month waiting period is just fine with me. I can appreciate the investigator's concerns given my drug history and if he thinks that 3 more months is what it takes for him to be comfortable, then I accept that proudly.
At least my daughter will finally get to be with me in my own home which something I've wanted her see for years. And I'll have supervisors (my parents) that won't be so biased against me.
BTW, the Access Center observation reports helped me a great deal. The OCL read all of them since February and he said not a single report disclosed anything other than a loving, affectionate and attentive relationship with me and my little girl.
I know there's a ways to go yet, but I'm happy about this OCL investigation.
Thanks everyone!
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