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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #11  
Old 05-26-2014, 09:03 AM
Beachnana Beachnana is offline
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Ex's lawyer is putting pressure on you to settle. It is likely a bluff as they now know you are not represented so playing the heavy lawyer hand. Do not sign anything until you are fairly comfortable with the outcome. Reply back that you will need 2 weeks to go over the details, as you are no longer represented by Lawyer x. State exactly what clauses you have issue with, but do not go into specifics.

Then go through the agreement and include the details you wNt to see. Be fair and make sure it reflects reality of shared parenting and joint custody.
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  #12  
Old 05-26-2014, 09:45 AM
Ilovemykids Ilovemykids is offline
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qcfc88- In your case the draft order was made and there was a real change prior to you signing it. In my case there are no real changes since it was drafted. I am faced now with her making a motion to have it enforced. I just disagree with what is there and it is unclear to me what my former lawyer agreed to. Were there any costs awarded in your case?

FYI- The draft consent order I am dealing with states in summary:

- The parties shall have joint custody of the children.

- The children will be in the Petitioners / Respondents care (Mon-Mon) every other week and ever second week thereafter (we change around on mondays).

- The Petitioner shall be primary responsible for choosing and scheduling the children's doctors, vision care and dental providers.

- The Petitioner shall claim the CCTB.

If she chooses doctors dentist and vision care providers she can further build a status quo towards her having primary care. Likely this will help her maintain the CCTB. I was doing the dental and she did vision and doc appointment. It was working well, then I suspect her laywer got involved and said he will get CCTB if he can prove he does some primary care.

Since I notified her lawyer last week that I had some issues with giving consent there has been a chill in the air in communicating with the Ex.
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  #13  
Old 05-26-2014, 02:05 PM
Beachnana Beachnana is offline
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Of course there is going to be a,chill in the air. Her,lawyer has assumes that you will just sign as you now have no legal advice. But coming onto this forum you will get plenty of views. Put a sweater on and read and learn.
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  #14  
Old 05-26-2014, 02:16 PM
good_mom good_mom is offline
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The Petitioner shall claim the CCTB.

The above is rubish...tax law not family law and you have the right to claim it if you have 50/50.
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  #15  
Old 05-26-2014, 04:52 PM
Ilovemykids Ilovemykids is offline
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Wow. Today I go to pick up the kids as per normal. The three kids are ready. One is missing. At that precise moment I get an email from my Ex saying that my oldest daughter doesn't want to come home and wants to stay there with her mom. Talk about a chill in the air! She is denying me access. First time in a year! Within a week of saying I am claiming CCTB, refusing to pay for childcare (she was supposed to graduate in the spring and is "now taking courses for the summer") and that I don't consent to this draft order giving her primary care. I am feeling very concerned.
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  #16  
Old 05-26-2014, 10:51 PM
Ilovemykids Ilovemykids is offline
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I called repeatedly and texted and got nothing in reply. How can someone just up and deny all communications between a father and child. I haven't seen her in a week. We had a good week the previous week. I called her, texted her and called, emailed and texted her mother. It is very upsetting.
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  #17  
Old 05-27-2014, 08:20 AM
Serene Serene is offline
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You will be obligated to pay a share of child care regardless if she was supposed to graduate or not. I would reinstate your payment for same.
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  #18  
Old 05-27-2014, 12:57 PM
Serene Serene is offline
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What else I don't understand is how you feel forced?

You had representation. Anyone looking in will say if you didn't agree then you should have challenged/corrected the draft order in the appropriate timeline...

If your lawyer wasn't working for you well, then you replace the lawyer or go out on your own....

I'm not trying to be antagonistic at all. But if you start with a broken starting point, the rest will turn to crap in no time. It will also discredit you in front of a judge. Be forewarned if you decide to pursue this stance.
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  #19  
Old 05-27-2014, 02:25 PM
standing on the sidelines standing on the sidelines is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ilovemykids View Post
I called repeatedly and texted and got nothing in reply. How can someone just up and deny all communications between a father and child. I haven't seen her in a week. We had a good week the previous week. I called her, texted her and called, emailed and texted her mother. It is very upsetting.
how old is the child??
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  #20  
Old 06-02-2014, 12:02 PM
Ilovemykids Ilovemykids is offline
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Sorry. Got sidelined. The child is a teenager, 15 years. If she wants to stay with her mom. I am good with that, but the proper way to do that would be to go to court first rather then keep her while I am picking up the other kids. Really felt her absence at the dinner table and it did affect the other children. I am thinking of making an ex parte motion for leave to make a contempt motion. Good / bad?

I am afraid that she will keep my other children. She sent me a message the day after keeping my daughter suggesting that it was in retaliation of the hurt I caused for ending the marriage. It tears at the soul. I contacted a social worker and sent my daughter her number. I hope they can get in touch. Also my ex had cut off all my access of her. It took a few days to talk to her. My ex was hovering and took the phone when my daughter got upset. She said I couldn't talk to her if I was going to get her upset when I was telling her I am not mad, she is caught between two worlds. I wanted her to know I am and was thankful for all the moments we had together this past year- my ex sees this as manipulation instead of a father who loves his daughter. I never wanted to see my children hurt in this way. I want to be more conscious of the problems I too may be causing so I am talking to a social worker to help me figure that out.

This goes back to this consent order. I consented to access (50/50), custody (joint) and child support. I still don't consent to her receiving the CCTB despite what my lawyer may have negotiated, which I have no way of knowing because he was discharged prior to the draft being sent over from her lawyer (two months after it was originally negotiated). The draft consent order is only in affect for another two weeks anyways and I am still in disbelief she is still threatening to take it before a judge to have it enforced with what she says solicitor/client rates. It is such a complex situation. I asked for more time, now I have until friday. Can a judge order who will receive the CCTB?

Serene- ref "Anyone looking in will say if you didn't agree then you should have challenged/corrected the draft order in the appropriate timeline..."

My lawyer was on record for two months after it was negotiated. Her lawyer was late getting it to me for review and after I had discharged my lawyer so it is impossible for me now to ask her to review it as only she knows the details. I have to pay more lawyer $4K before she will get involved again.

Help!!!!
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dental, draft consent order, medical, minutes, primary care


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