ex wants to settle!??

[takeontheworld]

All I know is that because my ex was pissed that I wanted a divorce and a chance to be happy in life and so he was able to use the court system to try to exact revenge. I must have missed the part where chicks get off easy because I haven't had that experience at all.

Exactly... when I said I wanted a divorce that is when he stopped wiring money. Stopped paying his Half of mortgage. He was dumb enough to put in e mails...it was my fault that our daughter was suffering financially.

You can continue to complain that only men have it rough but unfortunately it simply makes you look whinney.

[takeontheworld]

Did you specifically request the imputation of income? Did you outline the respective sections of the guidelines (19) that deal with this?

Did you request full disclosure of his income tax information for the last 3 years? Did he refuse this? Did your representation then schedule an appearance before the judge and request an order for disclosure?

We have done all of this my friend...he has not filed income tax in the last 3 years as he is a non-resident. So we had asked for his most recent noa's. They have never been provided and even if they were, I know that he has not reported all of his income. So it wouldn't matter anyway.

When I realized we were getting no where, I decided that the amounts of money I was spending on a lawyer was simply not worth it and decided to self represent. I really couldn't do much worse.

[takeontheworld]

*pulls up a chair.... Grabs a beer....this is going to be good*

Still watching?

[NBDad]

All I know, is that given the choice, I'd MUCH rather have a vagina when appearing in court.

Sorry you don't like the facts, but family law is skewed (less than it once was, but it's still tilted to hell) in the woman's favor.

Your situation is unique in that there are very very few cases where the opposing party has the opportunity to flee to a country that Canada doesn't have reciprocal laws with.

You have your child full time with no interference or BS from your ex. Most people on here would give up limbs for that kind of deal.

[Pursuinghappiness]

For which there are remedies that your representation should be using. (ie. costs, vexatious litigant designation for your ex, etc).

You cannot recoup costs for everything...and you can only start recouping costs once you're firmly embroiled in the process....it takes time for any litigant to get a "history."

Questioning is expensive...you can't recoup for that...neither can you for CCs, SCs, or TMCs. He's brought motion after motion...some even once I've already consented. Those have been cheaper but still have cost. I also cannot recoup for our very expensive private custody evaluation. I also could not decline it.

Obviously, if we end up at trial, I will be asking for costs. But regardless, even with awarded damages, a divorce with ANY high conflict ex...whether male or female...is going to be expensive. And I did not receive any special treatment during court visits due to my gender....didn't happen...period. Women have to defend themselves in court and in custody evaluations just like men do.

I know a lot of women that have come out of high-conflict divorce in lot of debt or bankrupt. Being female doesn't guarantee you a damned thing in family court...total bullcrap.

[NBDad]

Still watching?

Hey FB....don't be greedy...share the beer

[FB_]

Still watching?

Oh yeah...

[takeontheworld]

You have your child full time with no interference or BS from your ex. Most people on here would give up limbs for that kind of deal.

It amazes me is how much you "think" you know. What I have is a little girl who doesn't understand why her father doesn't call, email or see her. So for her to have a relationship with her father, I would gladly put up with him.

[takeontheworld]

Sorry you don't like the facts, but family law is skewed (less than it once was, but it's still tilted to hell) in the woman's favor.

You mean the "facts" according to you?

[FB_]

Hey FB....don't be greedy...share the beer

Cheers

[HammerDad]

We have done all of this my friend...he has not filed income tax in the last 3 years as he is a non-resident. So we had asked for his most recent noa's. They have never been provided and even if they were, I know that he has not reported all of his income. So it wouldn't matter anyway.

When I realized we were getting no where, I decided that the amounts of money I was spending on a lawyer was simply not worth it and decided to self represent. I really couldn't do much worse.

So it is family laws court that they cannot cause an individual, whom the courts have no jurisdiction over, to provide requested documentation?

Again, your issue has nothing to do with family courts or any perceived gender bias. Your issue is that your ex does not live in Canada and is not a Canadian citizen. And the country he does live in does not have the appropriate treaty for your remedy.

Your situation is that your ex decided he would rather cut and run, cutting you and your daughter off than live up to his financial and fatherly obligations.

NBDad's point is that he, and other men, have to prove they are a fit parent. Whereas, most mothers are deemed a fit parent from the beginning. Men seemingly have to work twice as hard to show they are just as capable parent as their ex, and the ex isn't held to such a standard.

[NBDad]

See the difference with you is that you are doing what you SHOULD be doing. Of course it's expensive.

Now...stop doing those things. How long do you think you could get away with it? I'll give you a hint...a long damn time...

Now get your EX to stop doing those things....how long do you think HE would get away with it? Hint...a lot LESS time that you.

[Pursuinghappiness]

NBDad's point is that he, and other men, have to prove they are a fit parent. Whereas, most mothers are deemed a fit parent from the beginning. Men seemingly have to work twice as hard to show they are just as capable parent as their ex, and the ex isn't held to such a standard.

Really???

I went through an 8-month long custody review...including a full psych work-up...home visit...intense questioning of my kid...etc.

I had to keep detailed notes of every move I made with my own children for over a year just to defend myself against my ex's endless lies. The cost of the evaluation was split 50/50....regardless of income levels.

I must have missed the part where my vagina gave me some f'ing advantage in the process. Can some woman on here who's been through an OCL or private investigation please fill me in on how women get away with not having to prove their parenting abilities during this process? I must have missed that part and now I'm really curious as to how a vagina helps you get through this easier.<!-- / message -->

[takeontheworld]

So it is family laws court that they cannot cause an individual, whom the courts have no jurisdiction over, to provide requested documentation?

Again, your issue has nothing to do with family courts or any perceived gender bias. Your issue is that your ex does not live in Canada and is not a Canadian citizen. And the country he does live in does not have the appropriate treaty for your remedy.

.

He is indeed a Canadian citizen, I said he is a non res. They are two different terms.


Ill have to disagree with you that it doesn't belong in family law. Neither judge has ordered he turn over proof of income. he's not even been honest on his 13.1 as I had no idea about the debt. When it was brought up at sc judge didn't seem to think it matters.

We will agree to disagree.

[FB_]

My ex assaulted me (minor, no injuries) several times during our in home separation. I called the cops...they did nothing....This is a family law matter they said.

Lets flip that around and see what happens...Hand Cuffs...Done seeing my kids for probably a year...Sole Custody.... END OF STORY...

My Lawyer told me flat out if we get x, y, z judge it's likely you will lose. If you get a, b, c you have a good chance of 50/50...

I can only go on my experience and my view of the details.

Takeontheowrld....Your ex is the reason that Dad's have to fight harder (POS dead beat losers who would rather run)