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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #1  
Old 01-22-2021, 09:55 PM
thgink9- thgink9- is offline
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- Currently posted to Ottawa and am due to be posted to Kingston.

- Have Sole custody and Primary residence status of my 8 year old.

- My Ex gave me Sole custody in 2019 for $1000 off of their arrears.

- Ex has only had every other weekend and for the past year, every Wednesday for a few hours. This has occurred since our Son was 3 years old. Prior to that, he had supervised visitations.

- Currently I have a paragraph on my order saying I am not allowed to life outside the City of Ottawa. This was added in 2019. From 2016 to 2019, the clause was I was able to live within the Province of Ontario. It was changed based on claims of future plans from my Ex that has still not occurred.

- Me and my Ex have a very hostile relationship. We have never agreed on anything.

- Ex currently lives in Ottawa, but approximately 30 minutes away.

- Ex has had no job in over a year (living off of lottery winnings which he didn't claim with regards to child support but I don't know if he needs to or not). He lives with his Mother and Brother. My son sleeps in a bunk bed with my Ex.

- I asked my Ex if we could increase the mobility clause to include Kingston. My Ex had been stating they wanted to remove Wednesday access because its hard to work around it. So I offered that and an additional weekend every other month. I also offered to pick up our Son at the end of access if my Ex picks up at the beginning thus sharing the travel.

- My Ex completely shut me down and said no. When I asked what they wanted, they wanted the entirety of the travel costs covered or for me to pick up and drop off during their access.

- I am looking to take this to court because in my mind, I am offering my Ex more time, removing the Wednesday access at their request, doing half the travel (which right now they do all of it as per the current order) and access time remains the exact same.

- I was informed that in March 2021, the new Act will essentially remove mobility restrictions as long as they do not impact the child's relationship with the other parents or access. I do not know how accurate this is tho. However if true, this wouldn't impact at all as literally nothing changes with regards to access and communication. If anything, my Ex gets more time with the additional weekend.

- I have gone through all of the Goertz factors and everyone of them I can clearly articulate in my favor.

- Do I have a Status Quo case with regards to the province of Ontario clause from the previous order?

- I cannot clearly identify any argument my Ex can make to influence a court decision in this matter but I wanted to bounce everything off of members here.
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  #2  
Old 01-23-2021, 03:09 AM
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More compromise will settle the matter.

More meaningful access and for longer durations is the way to do it. (If you don't want to go to court.)

Split all school holidays equally (march break, christmas, etc...), summer 2 weeks in July and 2 weeks in August of his choice, etc...
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Old 01-23-2021, 08:16 AM
thgink9- thgink9- is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tayken View Post
More compromise will settle the matter.

More meaningful access and for longer durations is the way to do it. (If you don't want to go to court.)

Split all school holidays equally (march break, christmas, etc...), summer 2 weeks in July and 2 weeks in August of his choice, etc...
My Ex already gets all holidays split evenly. Sorry should have added that.
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Old 01-24-2021, 02:21 PM
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Originally Posted by thgink9- View Post
My Ex already gets all holidays split evenly. Sorry should have added that.
More time more time more time.

Offer up as much time as your can. If you offer up access time that is incredibly generous then people usually agree to these kinds of changes.
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Old 01-24-2021, 03:49 PM
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Speak with a lawyer before you take this to court. The debater in me sees that nothing you've said would make this a winning case for you; except that your ex agrees with it...

You've offered half the driving and he wants it all covered. That's the only issue. Like $100. Would you be ok with a reduction in cs?
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Old 01-25-2021, 06:41 AM
thgink9- thgink9- is offline
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Originally Posted by StillPaying View Post
Speak with a lawyer before you take this to court. The debater in me sees that nothing you've said would make this a winning case for you; except that your ex agrees with it...

You've offered half the driving and he wants it all covered. That's the only issue. Like $100. Would you be ok with a reduction in cs?
Even though I’m being forced to work through my job? Access isn’t changing at all, it’s going to have zero effect on our Son as it’s not his first move, he wants to move, and he’s not in school right now and hasn’t been in almost a year due to covid.

Would my ex have to make any form of arguement to stop the move if they are loosing absolutely anything? They are even gaining time and losing driving responsibilities.
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Old 01-25-2021, 07:43 AM
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Why should dad split the driving with you when you are the one moving? That’s 2 hours one way. This sounds like this is his major issue with your plan, and rightfully so.
Offer to do the driving, it’s what would most likely be ordered in court anyways.
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Old 01-25-2021, 07:47 AM
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If he does all the driving currently that’s 30 mins there and back x2 in one weekend. That’s a total of 2 hours on the road for him. You asking him to split the drive with you to Kingston and just do the drop off or pick up would increase his drive time to 4 hours.
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Old 01-25-2021, 10:52 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Selfrepmom View Post
Why should dad split the driving with you when you are the one moving? That’s 2 hours one way. This sounds like this is his major issue with your plan, and rightfully so.
Offer to do the driving, it’s what would most likely be ordered in court anyways.
That was my thought as well. The parent moving should be responsible for 100% of the transportation.
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Old 01-25-2021, 12:47 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thgink9- View Post
Even though I’m being forced to work through my job? Access isn’t changing at all, it’s going to have zero effect on our Son as it’s not his first move, he wants to move, and he’s not in school right now and hasn’t been in almost a year due to covid.

Would my ex have to make any form of arguement to stop the move if they are loosing absolutely anything? They are even gaining time and losing driving responsibilities.
The fact that you see zero affect on your child tells me you're doing this for yourself and your dislike of your ex rather than for your child.

Would you accept less cs or do all driving?
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