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Old 11-20-2008, 06:25 PM
Zerou Zerou is offline
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Default Uncont Settlement

Have an unusual case here, and today we were informed we might be able to get an uncontested settlement.

Mother had interim order for custody which expired without her knowing in the middle of the year. There's two kids in question, which she had interim for both. Due to changes in the mothers life (Introduction of me, biological father of her eldest) she agreed to let the youngest (whom's father is who is in question) stay primarily at his house while this adjustment was going on as we didn't want him to get confused with his older brother calling someone else daddy (He's only 4, just turned) and such. Consistent visits every weekend and more were in place to the mothers.

Note: The eldest is no longer in this custody issue as the mother is now with his biological father.

As mentioned, the interim order had expired without her knowing, and when it came time that everything had settled and been adjusted, the father refused him returning to his mother as he knew the interim expired. He didn't let him see her for over a month, and told her to bring him to court to get access as the status quo was the child living at his house and she would not get custody.

Near the end of this month period that he withheld him from his mother, he started showing signs of seperation problems and he finally agreed to let her see him and go to court. He stalled the first conference (as I hear a lot of people do) and was served 3 days late, thus he didn't submit his papers and got a remanded court date... HOWEVER

During this conference when he didnt have his papers, the two of them went into mediation. They came up with a shared custody arrangement, alternating weeks during non-school periods and residency at the fathers while going to school. However, nothing was signed as her lawyer wanted to look over the mediation summary.

This was a huge comprimise by the mother as he is not the ideal candidate to raise him, as he lives in housing with a girlfriend who has 4 other kids, including his son and his daughter from another mother. He encourages his son to call his girlfriend mommy, had him call his mother by her first name, hasn't potty trained him properly (Hes now 4 and still not going on the toilet consistantly), dirty clothes etc etc. This all came to light while the child was with him over the last year. He vowed he'd not let him call his gf mommy, and bring him to his needed appointments etc etc, however hasn't followed through on any of it.

Now, because of the mediation session, he must believe everything is settled. He did not retain a lawyer because he was so sure he would win if they went to court. Because of that, he has NOT filed ANY papers whatsoever in response to the mother's application. The shared custody has been in effect on a non-legally binding agreement between the two of them however he keeps trying to add more days to her "visitation" while he retains all the bonuses to having a dependant (i.e. CCTB, Tax credits, etc). It has become apprent this is the only reason he wants his son...

The mother attended the remanded court date and was informed that the respondant had not filed any papers and was a no-show, and she may be entitled to an uncontested settlement.

Finally, to my questions:

Nothing was signed in mediation, however the father believes this is what will be happening. Will this affect the uncontested settlement? This is probably the reason he has not filed papers, however the clerks at the courthouse stressed to him he had to fill out the papers. That isn't a good enough excuse to miss his next court date and not provide his information correct? Nothing was signed.

In the originally application by the mother, sole custody with access to the father to be determined by the mother was asked. If there is an uncontested settlement, will this be the terms?

The "status quo" has now changed thankfully from the child being mainly at the fathers to shared between the two (Actually more days with the mother now that he feels "secure" and trys to avoid as much time with him as possible). Will this help?

Has anyone else had an uncontested application go through? What happens? Will she get her original application approved without him to rebutle?

Thanks for reading this gigantic post!

Last edited by Zerou; 11-20-2008 at 06:27 PM. Reason: Missing info
Old 11-20-2008, 07:41 PM
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dadtotheend dadtotheend is offline
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It appears you already get what's happening. Dad gets what Mom understands to be only temporary care of the child and turns it into a status quo, using expiration of the old agreement and stalling techniques to justify and extend the situation.

The unsigned mediation agreement means nothing. Can't really comment on the uncontested settlement.

Hopefully they can come to an agreement on joint custody and access. If not and the conflict continues/escalates, the court may see that it's apparent that both sides can't get along and sole custody to the Dad could be in play.

Last edited by dadtotheend; 11-20-2008 at 07:48 PM.
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