Co-parenting and spouse decides who children associate with

[arabian]

abuseddad - I'd focus on your you own issues. I don't believe this is a battle for you to fight. The grandparents can pursue the matter through their own legal counsel and I don't think it is proper that you add to your problems by fighting a fight for them. Stay focussed on your own shit.

[Straittohell]

The solution is simple. Wait until you're no longer under the same roof, and then conduct yourself with the kids while you see fit.

That can include being the one that facilitates your kids seeing your ex's side of the family.

In my own situation, my ex spent almost two years struggling to stay in touch with her family due to reasons I shall not go into. They always knew that if they wanted time with the kids, all that they had to do was ask, and I have never denied them. My ex didn't like it, but it really wasn't her business what I did with the kids on my time.

Eventually, she started to repair a number of rifts with her family, and things are getting better. I still let the kids see her side of the family regardless, and the world has not ended.

The others are right. Let your ex's family know that you can't get in the middle of this right now, and then focus your energy on getting out of this mess.