Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

do you think he abandoned them

Collapse
This topic is closed.
X
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • #46
    Yes clarification would be nice. If both the father and mother both live in Alberta it should simplify matters... why then would it be necessary for kids to miss school? Aren't weekend visitations feasible? Spring break? Easter?

    Comment


    • #47
      Did the ex know that you and the kids would be in Ontario from Jan 1 - Jan 10 before he asked for the visit?

      If so, I'll suggest he's just continuing the d!ckish approach/attitude he has taken all along and if that's the case, I'd tell him to wait 'til you get back to Alberta and he can have all the visits he wants then.

      Comment


      • #48
        It's obvious from the start OP was more than willing to accommodate him regarding contact with the children. And earlier this month she was thrilled when he indicated he wanted to see them during the holidays.

        Just an idea ringetteplayer..why not have him visit the kids where they live with you instead of him taking them to Alberta? The kids are doing very well socially, scholastically and emotionally. He can visit their school, perhaps meet the teachers if he can be there at the time; meet their friends, etc.

        Comment


        • #49
          Caranna- did you read the thread where she stated she moved to Alberta, started a new job and the kids were enrolled in school there?

          When she fisrt started posting on this forum she was in Ontario but the above link, very first post she states she is an Alberta. So the OP either lied about being in Alberta or is playing games with this whole Christmas thing

          Comment


          • #50
            I see on 10-19 OP states that she is in Alberta, 4-5 hours away from her tbx.

            Hi everyone just thought i would update you, in alberta now loving the new job kids are great, if you remember i rec'd an email from my stbx regarding moving to alberta he said yes.

            I went to text him that we were here 4-5hours away, and once i texted him replied that he was calling the rcmp on me again for harrassment. that was sep 26 i haven;'t contacted him since, and vice versa.

            so needless to say he still doesn;t pay child support and he doesnt know where we are., the matrimonial house sits in ontario, he never contacts or asks to see the kids, my lawyer just called today she is ready to execute or serve him papers, however, should i have them transferred here to file in alberta now or should they stay in ontario? I can keep her for the real estate of the house but for the custody and cs, ss should i get an alberta lawyer?


            thanks.,

            Comment


            • #51
              Originally posted by Berner_Faith View Post
              When she fisrt started posting on this forum she was in Ontario but the above link, very first post she states she is an Alberta. So the OP either lied about being in Alberta or is playing games with this whole Christmas thing
              Not sure I see where the OP did either of the above.

              Mom moved to Alberta in July.
              Ex wants nothing to do with kids even after she moves them closer
              The mat. home and her parents are still in Ontario.
              Mom decided to spend Christmas/New Year with parents in Ontario.
              Scum of an ex now wants kids back in AB with him from Jan 1 - 10

              OP hasn't posted anything misleading or false and doesn't seem to be "playing games", unless I'm misconstruing something.

              Comment


              • #52
                OP stated that dad wanted to fly the children to HIS province... If she did in fact move to Alberta, as she stated, her arguement about not wanting the children in Alberta is very weak, seeing as Alberta is the children's province also. Or she didn't move to Alberta, lied in her previous thread, which is why she is now stating she doesn't want the children to go to Dad's province.

                So OP- where exactly are you living?

                Comment


                • #53
                  Berner_Faith, in OP's last post I copied, OP mentions that she moved to Alberta 4-5 hours away from her stbx. "HIS province" could mean because he moved there first (and also worked there previously if I am recalling correctly).
                  Last edited by caranna; 11-28-2012, 11:38 PM. Reason: clarity

                  Comment


                  • #54
                    Originally posted by caranna View Post
                    Berner_Faith, in OP's last post I copied, OP mentions that she moved to Alberta 4-5 hours away from her stbx. "HIS province" could mean because he moved there first (and also worked there previously if I am recalling correctly).
                    I understand that, but her whole issue was she didn't want the kids in Alberta... If she in fact moved to Alberta (like her previous post stated) she has a very, very weak argument over the kids not going there.

                    I think we all need to wait for the OP to respond before anyone can offer anymore advice.

                    Comment


                    • #55
                      Originally posted by Berner_Faith View Post
                      I think we all need to wait for the OP to respond before anyone can offer anymore advice.
                      My thoughts exactly.

                      Comment


                      • #56
                        hi

                        hi everyone sorry for the delay its hockey/ringette season and with 3 kids its tricky to get on here some nights.

                        thanks everyone for your support/ advicce / input greatly appreciated.

                        to clarify
                        I did live in Ontario 2 months ago I 'moved" to alberta
                        I did leave the mat home (he pays mortgage no child or spousal)
                        we have no agreement on anything.

                        I am not to contact him as he made it clear he does not want me to contact him
                        he can contact me to which he just did a couple of days ago asking for the kids on christmas
                        we are going back to ontario for christmas i told him he was welcome to come in the afternoon to get the kids from their grammas he declined.
                        (its not about making it easy for him its about the kids having a great holiday with family -what they want for christmas)
                        He then later emailed me asking for new years day jan -jan7.

                        great! However, i am afraid of him keeping the kids, he has just as much right as I do without an agreement? then regardless if I am in Ont or Alberta i am still fighting to get the kids back to their jurisdiction!
                        He is physically abusive to me and a complete bully if i see him in person or not. How do I approach/handle this without an agreement? Yes the last time he did have the kids he texted me that he was going to keep them.

                        Basically my concerns/questions stem from fear and how do I let the kids have a holiday with their dad and not a repeat of the past performance?

                        I am trying to do best for my kids holiday since it is about them they want to go back to Ont for Xmas and see their cousins gramma old friends.

                        It would be great if they could have a visit with their dad without the RCMP showing up and causing drama all over again for nothing.

                        Thanks again everyone for you support, concerns, and input I appreciate all of you and this forum to better my family and get through rough patch, so my kids can have a relationship with their dad and move forward with their life.
                        thanks again.

                        Comment


                        • #57
                          I'm not sure why Dad would have to do extra travel to Ontario, to get the kids, for a holiday visit, if they normally reside with you in Alberta, as well.

                          One would presume that you need to return to Alberta with kids anyway, before school starts up again, so if you are going to have the kids go with Dad, could you not just send kids to Alberta, and collect the kids when you later arrive there as well?

                          You can follow others advice, about getting a signed confirmation, whatever... but the whole "you can come to Ontario to get kids" seems like an unecessary roadblock, to making this easier.

                          You need a child custody agreement or order. You need to work on getting that in place, so you have "less" to worry about, with stuff like this.

                          Comment


                          • #58
                            Originally posted by ringettteplayer View Post
                            .
                            I am trying to do best for my kids holiday since it is about them they want to go back to Ont for Xmas and see their cousins gramma old friends.
                            Sounds like he only asked for the kids on those dates after he found out they would be spending time with extended family in Ontario.
                            It seems to me the ex just continues to prove what an a$$ he is.

                            Again, I suggest you tell him that you will be back in Alberta on (insert date here) and he is more than welcome to have access to the kids then.

                            You know, kinda like what you've been trying to accomplish since July.

                            Comment


                            • #59
                              Get the agreement in order. Tell him that once it is completed it will be much easier for him to plan time with his children as it will specify access for things such as vacations, birthdays etc.

                              I can certainly understand your reluctance at this time as it sounds like a very volatile situation.

                              I believe it is usually all about the money. Your ex now is in a high-earning job and will likely have to pay substantial child support. He hasn't paid a dime in support and he likely knows that he will be nailed big-time for arrears. He now has another family to support as well. Desperate people do desperate things. I'd keep a very close eye on your children until such time as you have some sort of agreement drawn up. Others may say it is blackmail - I think it is a matter of playing your cards right. Sooner or later he will have to face his responsibilities.

                              Comment


                              • #60
                                thanks

                                hi thanks everyone,

                                agreed i do believe making the extra trip to ontario is inconvenient, for him! road block more like a bump, it would benefit him as a dad to prove he would go the extra mile, it is ridiculous but he has done nothing and why would i make it easier for him at this point its about the kids and if he considered anything how much fun is it to spend in an airport on xmas day?? for a 12,8.5 year old.

                                yes telling him they would be back on such and such a day would be easy and i am willing to do that i was just reluctant to say yes to him without and agreement yes perhaps overbaring but these are my children I am dealing with a ruthless person, who doesnt care to pay for heat hydro and now the mortgage (hence one of the reasons i knew to leave).
                                It is money motivated for him. I was just trying to get the input from some of you if i seemed unreasonable without some sort of an agreement in place before he sees them.

                                again i appreciate everyones input as I know it may sound crazy and I admit it is an unusual situation, however i am nervous and i have rights to be nervous this is my kids i am talking about, he will and does use them as pawns something if i can prevent from happening I will.

                                thanks everyone I will keep you all posted and updated
                                btw my ironically my phone is ringing and guess who it is!! YUP daddy dearest lol

                                Comment

                                Our Divorce Forums
                                Forums dedicated to helping people all across Canada get through the separation and divorce process, with discussions about legal issues, parenting issues, financial issues and more.
                                Working...
                                X