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  • #1

    CP Enrolling in French School - NCP English only

    Any advice on how to deal with this?

    CP has fluent french, and wants to enroll our daughter in a French school (starting senior K this fall). We are in Toronto.

    The school is ALL FRENCH (all parent/public communications, rankings, classes, reports, schoolwork in french, and many teachers/staff have limited english).

    I am an active, involved NCP with every other weekend and Weds overnights.

    But I do not speak French!

    Right of the bat I am having difficulty contacting/evaluating the school. As soon as they learn mom is fluent and we don't live together, they don't want to speak to me.

    CP has a documented/proven history of discouraging doctor/daycare from communicating with me, or offering me the same level of service.
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  • #2
    It is a great opportunity for the chld to become fluently bilingual. Seeing as you're in Toronto rather than a more heavily bilingual area like Ottawa, there must be lots of other parents in the same situation - not speaking French. The school can't refuse to speak with you or provide information simply because you don't speak French. If they continue to block you out then call the school board and find out what their policy is and who you need to speak with to make sure you are provided with the info you need.

    I don't know what school or board she's registered in however through my work I am frequently in touch with people at various school boards across TO, both French and English, and have found their websites very useful on policies around language requirements. Most of the school boards have their information posted on the website, here's an excerpt from one:
    2. recognize that French is the language of communication between the school and the family. All correspondence, academic performance evaluations, parent meetings, committee meetings and school council meetings shall take place in French. However, a parent or guardian who does not speak French can always obtain information in English by contacting the school principal.
    • The school can't just flatly deny you information because of your language. Whether the teachers or whoever approve or not, the board's policy rules and you're entitled to the same level of service any other parent would be. They couldn't deny any communication at all if neither of you spoke French.

    Assert yourself as an involved parent and perhaps even take the opportunity to learn along with your child. If mom is using this as a tactic to shut you out then I guess she'd have to find another way if that wasn't an option either!

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  • #3
    Originally posted by dinkyface View Post
    Right of the bat I am having difficulty contacting/evaluating the school. As soon as they learn mom is fluent and we don't live together, they don't want to speak to me.
    on a side note....i keep reading that as flatulant.

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    • #4
      Consider making this an opportunity to learn french with your child!!

      I am sure she would get a big kick out of "teaching" Daddy new words!!

      Excellent bonding opportunity!!

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      • #5
        Originally posted by blinkandimgone View Post
        on a side note....i keep reading that as flatulant.
        omg! thank you for that !!!!!!!!

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        • #6
          and for the OP - your child has an awesome opportunity that could benefit them for the rest of their lives - don't fight it - you can learn a lot too - just embrace it - please.

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          • #7
            That's why it is killing me. It is a good school, a great opportunity, something I want for our daughter ... but I'm deeply afraid of the power this gives to CP, considering past behaviour (extremely non-communicative, continuous attempts to put up a wall of silence between us, with ABSOLUTE minimum info shared voluntarily, including blocking information from being shared by other professionals, including her address!).

            My other main concern is not being able to support her in homework very well. (remember, they are not teaching french... they are teaching IN french). Then again, I'm sure somehow I'll be able to figure out the stuff as it comes (got a few other languages under my belt), though would not be able to offer any suggestions on written/expository work (a few years down the road).

            There is another immersion school very close, very similarly ranked (and trending up), that appears not to have this language barrier. I'll probably be making an argument for that one.

            Our court order indicates if we do not agree, we must seek mediation.
            Last edited by dinkyface; 02-01-2011, 11:09 PM.

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            • #8
              If your child does end up in the French school then you make sure to establish yourself as a fully involved parent. If they push back you present them with your seperation agreement that outlines your parenting agreement and remind them that you divorced your wife, not your child. Insist on being provided with all relevant information in English so you can best support your child and find all the resources you can to help yourself help her.

              There are other parents out there like you. One of my kids is in a french school and my french is terrible and very limitted. I purposely screw up phrases because I know she'll correct me

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              • #9
                Originally posted by blinkandimgone View Post
                on a side note....i keep reading that as flatulant.
                I guess that would count as 'OTHER' in the 'Reasons why you Divorced' poll!

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                • #10
                  Lmao!

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                  • #11
                    Originally posted by blinkandimgone View Post
                    ... If they push back you present them with your seperation agreement that outlines your parenting agreement and remind them that you divorced your wife, not your child. Insist on being provided with all relevant information in English so you can best support your child and find all the resources you can to help yourself help her...
                    I've done that with the family doctor, unsuccessfully. Our order indicates I have the right to meet with teachers /doctors separately from CP (she'd NEVER agree to joint meetings). They just say they don't have time to deal with 2 parents independently. Then there's no recourse, no remedy. It's been such a tedious maddening situation, and am not welcoming more of the same. Waaaah Waaah Waaah!!!!

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                    • #12
                      That does sound frustrating

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                      • #13
                        Originally posted by dinkyface View Post
                        I've done that with the family doctor, unsuccessfully. Our order indicates I have the right to meet with teachers /doctors separately from CP (she'd NEVER agree to joint meetings). They just say they don't have time to deal with 2 parents independently. Then there's no recourse, no remedy. It's been such a tedious maddening situation, and am not welcoming more of the same. Waaaah Waaah Waaah!!!!
                        If the doctor's policy is to not do separate meetings, then you'll need to be informed of WHEN the child's appointments are so you can show up and be advised accordingly.

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                        • #14
                          Court order indicates both can visit - separately - and that CP is to inform me of Dr. visits. But she's no longer even informing me of past visits. No response to emailed questions. Dr. no longer sending me updates via PSA envelopes I provided. Makes me just a little worried that if there was some issue - like Hep? - that I'd never be told.
                          Picked up DD from daycare yesterday, and noticed she had received a shot in the arm....no idea what for (probably flu). DD got very uncomfortable when I asked if she had been to the Doctor... but happily said that she did get a sticker!

                          Anyway...so you see why I'm so worried about the school thing!

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                          • #15
                            If you're not opposed to learning french yourself, take the opportunity to do so with your child. Kids love nothing more than to know something daddy doesn't or to teach their parents something. Let the school know that you are an anglophone who will be learning french with your child and you'll be a superstar in their eyes. But you can also ask for correspondence in english until you understand french well enough.

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