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LF32 "need to see daughter" pt.2

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  • Encouraging words Mr. Toronto. Im starting to get all of it. Like Arabian .. I just find the process outrageous. Just not right.

    I need to get this letter off tonight so he gets it in the morning. So much info to get in. Ill save the disclosure stuff for the next one.

    Dear Mr _____


    To prevent future confusion with regards to e-mails, all future Thursday access will be considered confirmed unless I notify you otherwise. All access visits have been successful and therefore I see no reason why Thursday visits shall not be expanded to 9:00am - 5:00pm, this shall be established commencing July 3rd. We will be visiting a museum. This is something D3 and I did frequently prior to the separation and it is in her best interests to continue with such activities and outings.

    Please confirm you have received my voluntary hair follicle test. I am also conducting weekly urinalysis tests for alcohol, these will be forwarded as they become available.



    Is Ms. _____ still residing in the jurisdiction of ______?


    Ms. _____'s consistent refusals of additional access time will be noted and only demonstrate a continued lack of co-operation."

    Thank you,



    Comment


    • The OCL may be your best friend now....if the ex has no place for a investigation. and the lawyers worst enemy

      Try to keep a calendar around to follow stuff....you may want to code things because your forgetting items.

      mediation is over (no sense mentioning it you got enough proof, it's declined)

      disclosure is a buzzing bee
      settlement offer...still valid

      hair test is over

      looking for extra or increased access (denied) for museum's or extended family birthdays and celebrations for D3

      child focus'd stuff

      want to attend swim class with supervisor

      9 am ..3 hour access

      Supervised access should end now....unless the ex has taken off

      --confirm in town
      --welfare pay
      --lease

      dig for fat ex mothers stuff

      ...like the 1 hour access....if you keep your head down...with a goal....the breaks will happen

      Comment


      • Nope

        To prevent future confusion with regards to e-mails, I suggest all future Thursday access will be considered confirmed unless I am notified otherwise.

        D3 and I have enjoyed our limited time together and therefore I see no reason why Thursday visits would not be expanded from 9:00am - 5:00pm, with your clients agreement is it possible to start July 3rd.

        ALSO.... D3 and I frequently went on little outings prior to the separation which we both enjoyed I request to continue with such activities with notice... to go to museum's ,libraries or parks , I will provide notice

        try not to demand anything.....keep your foot in the door....always try to be humble..break it up for a judge to read....simple para...you can use yellow high liter for Judge later....don't highlite OP copy....WHAT!

        Comment


        • Is Ms. _____ still residing in the jurisdiction of ______?


          Ms. _____'s consistent refusals (don't JUDGE there is a Judge that determines) of additional access time (don't conclude things for a Judge they hate that) will be noted and only demonstrate a continued lack of co-operation."

          Thank you

          your venom comes through loud and clear........( I use to write stuff like that)...now I write junk that helps me look good later at Trials (I quit giving my "expectations" to lawyers....and was all nicey nicey for a Judge)

          You need to understand.....in Court there is 5000 different positions/angles do not ever take a firm stand on anything....because a lawyer or judge will ...find a way to around your (one) position....and sucker punch you

          let a judge determine consistent refusals. You just offer (nicely) and they refuse

          let a judge NOTE a continued lack of whatever....you don't note anything

          your personality comes through (frustrated, abrupt, too the point) LOL...lawyers are dis-interested, calm, detached, hopeful

          My supervisor noted on (date) for the 1 hour access...that her friend was from (province) is your client spending a lot of time there?.....
          Last edited by MrToronto; 06-30-2014, 11:54 PM.

          Comment


          • You don't think I should ask if her residence is still in the city or mention disclosure in this one?

            You've been with me from the beginning. You know my case as good as I do but have more experience and wisdom. I will be taking your advice for sure.

            You're right. Calm, patient, loving, caring, LF32 must come through in the letters.

            He will use every syllable against me. Unless I don't give him anything. The kinder I am, the more headaches he has.

            Okay .. I'll use what you suggested, clean it up and send it off.
            Last edited by LovingFather32; 06-30-2014, 11:52 PM.

            Comment


            • The lawyer is a good read of character....he examines witnesses....and can figure out personalities

              He will pretend to match your personality type...(abuser, controlling) to get you to show who you are......it's not hard to do....and his letter will match your personality type......street fighter vs street fighter....or nice guy vs nice guy

              he wants you to engage...control freaks hate short answers it drives them nuts

              you can't let your frustration be used against you....go Dali Lama...take it up the arse and smile...offer him a flower

              Comment


              • Originally posted by MrToronto View Post
                Dali Lama...take it up the arse
                And with that, I shall call it a night. LMAO

                Thanks again for your continued support and assistance. Im going to pull through this.

                Comment


                • that's why a lot of people demand a lawyer.....they are detached....no real other reason any dummy can do this court garbage

                  the judge is the one who sniffs this pile of s*it....and he see's no parenting plans but all about money....they go into the dumpster

                  they see bitter vengeful exe's that fit profiles....and assume mommys best

                  be above it....your the best parent.....be patient...always beg be polite focus on D3....you've reached the new point....thanks to your ex.....NO SOUP FOR YOU., you should be kissing there feet....they left a path wide open for you the better parent

                  lmao...nite dali lama
                  Last edited by MrToronto; 07-01-2014, 12:24 AM.

                  Comment


                  • So I was thinking. FB mentioned a while back about going for 2 motions. A short one and a long one. I'm still being supervised. This is ridiculous and 5 minutes in front of a judge and they will agree. It's embarrassing as well. I'll need supervision until I intervene myself judicially.

                    Short Motion: 1.Drop Supervision ; 2. OFW ; 3. Scheduled Access
                    (add a day?)

                    Also, Ive been told to only go for access that I can live with at motion. Obviously I cant live with a measly 2 days. I'm confused what stops me from going for other motions for increased access afterwards. (graduating?)

                    With an OCL attachment (If I ever get it) proving Ive made effort to check status of file and will be a long time, this should be a victory in court. Successful visits, no conflict, hair follicle, etc. And I wont be asking for the world.

                    I can continue building my case with the thousand other things their doing and denying. This way will have gained a little victory along the way.

                    To quote WorkingDad:

                    "supervised access was just make me suffer. And I did suffer every freaking time I go to my friend house and stay 1.5 hour with my kid there like I some sort of animal ... I asked my lawyer why the hell I have to agree for Supervised Access. I did not do anything wrong... that humiliating..."

                    Opinions/Thoughts? Could have them in court in 2 weeks for this.
                    Last edited by LovingFather32; 07-01-2014, 08:19 AM.

                    Comment


                    • Originally posted by LovingFather32 View Post
                      Also, Ive been told to only go for access that I can live with at motion. Obviously I cant live with a measly 2 days. I'm confused what stops me from going for other motions for increased access afterwards. (graduating?)
                      Your Social Worker - Gary Direnfeld, MSW, RSW

                      If your priority as a parent is to facilitate responsible human beings, capable of loving and productive lives and to have a life-long relationship with them, then quantum of time is no longer a fight worth having. Indeed playing to your priority, you can have far less direct time, but a more meaningful and fulfilling life with your children given the actual time available. That will be your children’s legacy and your priority will have been met with nothing lost!

                      Love your children and certainly love them more than you love winning. Love your children more than keeping conflict alive. As conflict flourishes, children do not. With your children’s lifelong well-being and a peaceful co-existence with their other parent as the priority, your children and your relationship with them will flourish.

                      It’s all about setting your priority carefully. Children’s well-being first.

                      Comment


                      • I will always make every second of access count. My whole 1 hour/week.

                        My priority will never be "winning". I don't like that terminology. My priority is and always will be creating avenues which facilitate the best interests of our daughter. And I believe she should have the ability to have both loving parents in her life equally. Not 60 minutes/week. The other party is interested in high conflict situations. I'm interested in the best interests and "well - being" of our daughter.

                        Comment


                        • Preparation. clarity, and purposeful are some items to strive for as you bounce around through this.

                          this article has been bouncing around for awhile, I've read it a few times (reviewed it) it'll keep you on track...because when you think you have all the ducks in a row, maybe you overlooked something.

                          in particular read the bottom of it

                          http://www.oba.org/en/pdf/JudgesView.pdf

                          http://www.google.ca/url?sa=t&rct=j&...69837884,d.aWw

                          http://www.google.ca/url?sa=t&rct=j&...69837884,d.aWw

                          anything on Trial Preparation (U-tube vids) or googled doc's will assist you on "what you need to fill in the blanks or what needs to be added, or what to get going forward.

                          carefully reading case law (too see the flow) helps also
                          Last edited by MrToronto; 07-01-2014, 11:14 AM.

                          Comment


                          • You'll note that there is lots of chronology suggestions in the documents I posted.

                            The history or background of your relationship prior to D3 could be a strength or weakness. (depending how the other party presents it)

                            My thinking is the lawyer was informed by the ex that she was moving back to other province (I stand by that).

                            it will be brought up....

                            that you both lived there longer...(did you)

                            that you hated the ex's mother and forced the move on your ex (will she)

                            that after arriving in new city you further blocked the ex's mother from any contact with ex (would they say...yup)

                            that D3 lived there in the other province longer (I dunno)

                            SO knowing,what they'll say on leading up to the child abduction

                            start looking for a defence

                            you both agreed to move, ex suggested it

                            the old goat ex's mother was going out of her way get rid of you and your extended family

                            you both agreed to distance yourselves from the goat.

                            then the old goat started a facebook campaign against your family, which both had to block her, until the goat calmed down

                            both were happy...you went to work (primary reason to move) there were no jobs where you both were.

                            it's very believable mothers and daughters fight..(silent treatment)...and want independence from their mothers.

                            other....

                            make sure you do the chronology with some "exhibits" time at job...school for D3 you both agreed on nearby....stuff that you ex was happily settling in...

                            If your chronology makes more sense....with a little proof added...then that'll shoot down another angle the ex can use on the abduction.

                            She is not to be allowed to "go back home" via slander and child abduction any casual connection backing up her bad choices has to be shot down
                            Last edited by MrToronto; 07-01-2014, 12:14 PM.

                            Comment


                            • Originally posted by MrToronto View Post
                              You'll note that there is lots of chronology suggestions in the documents I posted.

                              The history or background of your relationship prior to D3 could be a strength or weakness. (depending how the other party presents it)

                              My thinking is the lawyer was informed by the ex that she was moving back to other province (I stand by that).

                              it will be brought up....

                              that you both lived there longer...(did you)

                              that you hated the ex's mother and forced the move on your ex (will she)

                              that after arriving in new city you further blocked the ex's mother from any contact with ex (would they say...yup)

                              that D3 lived there in the other province longer (I dunno)

                              SO knowing,what they'll say on leading up to the child abduction

                              start looking for a defence

                              you both agreed to move, ex suggested it

                              the old goat ex's mother was going out of her way get rid of you and your extended family

                              you both agreed to distance yourselves from the goat.

                              then the old goat started a facebook campaign against your family, which both had to block her, until the goat calmed down

                              both were happy...you went to work (primary reason to move) there were no jobs where you both were.

                              it's very believable mothers and daughters fight..(silent treatment)...and want independence from their mothers.

                              other....

                              make sure you do the chronology with some "exhibits" time at job...school for D3 you both agreed on nearby....stuff that you ex was happily settling in...

                              If your chronology makes more sense....with a little proof added...then that'll shoot down another angle the ex can use on the abduction.

                              She is not to be allowed to "go back home" via slander and child abduction any casual connection backing up her bad choices has to be shot down

                              Originally posted by MrToronto View Post
                              that you both lived there longer...(did you)
                              Yes.

                              Originally posted by MrToronto View Post
                              that you hated the ex's mother and forced the move on your ex (will she)
                              Probably. It all began when we moved. I've been alienated from her family. Once an old high school friend of my mothers commented on a pic of D3 saying "Boy she looks so much like LF32. Ex's mother went on a rampage about how it looks like ex. How embarrassing for my mom. With my family it was a family unit. With ex's, she always demanded that she go alone.

                              Originally posted by MrToronto View Post
                              you went to work (primary reason to move) there were no jobs where you both were.
                              Yes. MUTUAL AGREEMENT. Her answer says that I wanted to move because of the French even though I am bilingual. We both were sick of QC politics and had a great deal on a house across from mothers. Sick of renting apartments and needed a change.

                              Originally posted by MrToronto View Post
                              make sure you do the chronology with some "exhibits" time at job...school for D3 you both agreed on nearby....stuff that you ex was happily settling in.
                              She landed herself a pleasant job in customer service, made some great friends and enjoyed the town. When I was at work she often left D3 at my moms and used my moms van to shop around (I always left my bank card with her). My mom was HUGE in D3's life and now barely sees her. We had a local pediatrician, a social group, water parks, etc. Things were good. Many happy photos, including baby belly photo op's outside. We hadn't really discussed school's yet.

                              Originally posted by MrToronto View Post
                              If your chronology makes more sense....with a little proof added...then that'll shoot down another angle the ex can use on the abduction.

                              She is not to be allowed to "go back home" via slander and child abduction any casual connection backing up her bad choices has to be shot down
                              Absolutely. Like I said. She wasn't much of a techy. But I do have many e-mails of lovey dovey stuff by her. So many love letters and happy pics. Doubt that's of much use. If there was conflict via e-mail t was about her family. There was always some kind of drama started by them and ex always called herself the "mediator" but I never had any issues. They did. As soon as we moved to ON by my family. Her mom always had some kind of problem though. You know .. the over-opinionated type? Most of her own family shut her out because of it. Husband left her for another woman. Taught ex never to rely on a man. They both suffered depression and were medicated after ex's father left. Her mom has never worked, doesn't drive. New b/f = full time job, did dishes, yardwork, etc. I truly believe ex wanted a life of no work like her mother and knew I was in to the "dual-income" lifestyle once D3 got older.

                              So yes .. the family thing will be brought up. It will be part of her offense.


                              And I like the "tables" in your article for chronologies. Tables/calendars with highlights. That will look great!

                              D3 was BORN in ON .. after the move!!! SO shes totally an ON baby.

                              I have e-mails b/w ex and I where I say I love her mother .. she's funny, vivacious, etc and that its her who has issue with me. In the e-mail I tell her to have her mom down. She still wont. I tell her if her moms not coming down because Im here that work every other weekend. I made so much effort to stop the conflict its unreal.
                              Last edited by LovingFather32; 07-01-2014, 01:32 PM.

                              Comment


                              • Sounds good. For a short motion it'll have to be chopped down a bit to some key points, to ensure a offset on a he said/ she said and referred to a chart exhibit.

                                To a chronology of events leading up to D3 and the abduction as a Exhibit Chart with dates and occurrence's I think that the Judge wrote "thing that annoy judge's" the chronology chart was appreciated....Tab 3 pg1 and any supporting doc's relating to the history are in Tab 3 page 2...or pulled from the chart as "This Tab pg.2"

                                Make darn sure if you do make a chart it's factual...honest and can stand up to questioning at a Trial....because it'll be used to contradict you or refute a position....so don't go over board...if there is a item that is clearly obviously a non debateable dated fact ...add it after you ananlyze from her angle and yours....lmao

                                The facebook thing may be a concern ....if you took a leadership role (always you) jawing away at the old goat.

                                Of course if your ex was planning on leaving ....she may of encouraged you to do the jawing

                                of course if the jawing away only happened in your city, then that's a consideration

                                if the ex's mother went after other facebook members of your family that would be neat to have,

                                if the ex has copies of only from date x to date y...then the copies don't show the lead up where she was doing all the jawing and then frustrated you got into it.

                                I also read somewhere here where the facebook messages can be questioned on authenticity because if not properly copied the messages can me altered very easily.....I think you need screen shots

                                it's also easy for someone to pretend they are you if you both share the Log in

                                regardless the ex needs doc's to support her position, I know you've thought of this before, it doesn't hurt to rethink and relook for items she would obtain to support her position.
                                Last edited by MrToronto; 07-01-2014, 03:19 PM.

                                Comment

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