Originally posted by standing on the sidelines
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Stalking/harrasment question
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One more post, than youdontneedtoblinkandimgone. After that, if anyone wants to write anything, please use my inbox:
dadtotheend, you are wrong about the "NO ONE" agrees with me. The way I count (so far), it is you, blink, standing on the sidelines and sufferer against, lanfear who seems pro, an other support message that I got in my inbox that is pro (I will only post the name If I get permission from the author), and myself that is obviously pro. So I would say 43% pro, 47% against.
Again, you guys are gneraly wrong about me. While I do not like your opinion, I value it, and to me, the fact that people on this board do not see this as clear-cut as I thought it is, is in itself an alarm bell. I know Canadian law is based on common sense, I know my common sense is quite often not the best, so I do believe there are more chances for this to be ilegal than I thought before I started the thread. To this extent, the thread has helped. But I still like to hear a specialist's opinion, even if it might just be waisted money. And I will certanly respect his advice. Revenge is not bad, but you have to keep things into perspective, it's definitely not worth having problems with the law or loosing your job.
Blink, no, I don't think I had the perfect marriage. We had issues, and I accept the fact that getting close to a serparation point was much more my fault than my wife's. Which is why I try to work thing out. I think we have a fair chance too.
I'm sorry to dissapoint you guys, but I'm not going to do anything stupid. It's just not who I am. Keep dreaming dough...
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Maybe you should stop focusing on them and start focusing on fixing your marriage. Do you really think your wife will not do this again? She's pretty nuts staying with you, does she know what your intentions are?
Not that I really want to offer advice on this but have you ever thought of maybe writing her a letter and maybe sending it registered mail that only she can sign for it? YUCK, I didn't want to add to this but you are just scaring everyone on here! Stop will you!
I don't think you will give this a rest otherwise and I really think that you need to leave them alone. Your wife was just a part of this mess as he is so she's to blame too!
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Originally posted by raghache View PostI'm in the following situation:
I found out that my wife has been cheeting on me for half of year, with her ex-boyfriend from Montreal. She gave up that relationship, and we are trying to reconcile, but being a vindictive fellow, I would like to contact his wife, and let her know everything about it.
I had all the contact information initially, and I did call his house to let her know. He suspected it's me, so he kept picking up the phone to prevent me from talking to her. I called for three days in a row, probabily around 10 times a day, but I kept either getting him, or his fax machine. In the end, on the third day, I finally got their answering machine, so I left a message stating who I am, what it's about and my contact information. I got a message from him accusing me of harrasment, and telling me he logged a complaint with the Montreal police. I don't really believe he did that, because he als wrote a message to my wife, asking her to make me stop. Also, this whole thing happend in March, and I did not get any call from any police about anything yet. Anyway, since I was trying to work things out with my wife, I stopped. But in the meantime, I got my wife to agreeing I should do whatever I feel like about this guy if I feel it helps me psychologicly, so I'm back to where I started. Sort of. He changed his phone, of course, so I don't have his number anymore.
My question: can there be anything legaly wrong for me to get over to his residence and ring his bell when he's not home ? He's at work in the morning, and his wife does not work, so I can easily do that, but can this be considered harrasment in any way ?
Thank you,
R.
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tugofwar, thanks for the sugestion, it was a good one. Did not know that a registered letter can not be signed for by the spouse, but I checked, and it looks like that's the way it is.
But there is nothing I can use it for now. The police finally wrote back - may be illegal, be very careful. Strongly advised against any kind of contact, direct or indirect. Mail would be indirect, I suspect.
That was a pretty clear message. At least it saves me a trip to the lawyer.
Anyway, I have been reading some other threads, and I have to say, I did not realise there are so many people in the same situation as me, or who were in the same situation as me. And some on this thread too, other than sidelines. Makes for an interesting and quite helpfull read. But I suspect all these marriages have failed. Would be nice to read about some that made it - maybe a different web site.
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