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  Ottawa Divorce .com Forums > Main Category > Parenting Issues

Parenting Issues This forum is for discussing any of the parenting issues involved in your divorce, including parenting of step-children.

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  #1  
Old 02-20-2019, 11:44 PM
tunnelight tunnelight is offline
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so my ex has a history of recommending things to me, sending things I dont need and trying to control me/my parenting/my time with child. This includes what activities to do with child when she is sick, where to joy take her, I.e. dont take child to fair because she is sick, and sending child with tylenol.

I have tylenol at my home and sort of take offense. worst part, she avoids communicating with me and gets child to tell me.. here is tylenol make sure to put it in fridge...child has been insisting ALL day that I must put it in fridge because her mom does and that's what her mom told her. I indicated to child on the container it clearly states to store at room temperature.

other parent has recently accused me of using the child as a messenger although clearly it is her that does this.. and did it again not too long ago getting child to tell me she has enrolled child in extra ordinary activities on my time, etc..

what is best thing to do here ? I've been just ignoring her crap to avoid getting sucked into back and forth on OFW and now she has started texting me after every OFW message to make sure I read it.... agreement clearly states communication. to. be on OFW unless in. case of emergency.

Ex's are really screwed up I tell ya.

would be ideal to take the tylenol to court and give it to her and set her in place in front of all the other parents there? I think I could shut her up nicely. or maybe get my lawyer to do it? I'm really sick and tired of her crap and feel the need to confront her face to face. nice polite messages and lawyer letters and even counselling and a parenting plan hasn't done the trick.

or just give her the silent treatment and only communicate important things such as appointments and appointment outcomes ?
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  #2  
Old 02-20-2019, 11:50 PM
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Janus Janus is offline
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She can rattle you just by sending you Tylenol? If I was your ex and I knew this it would be open season on your fragile psyche.

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or just give her the silent treatment and only communicate important things such as appointments and appointment outcomes ?
How is that not the obvious answer?
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  #3  
Old 02-21-2019, 12:13 AM
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arabian arabian is offline
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I've never heard of storing Tylenol in the refrigerator.

I've only bough Tylenol and Advil on the shelf. Is there an exception?

Yeah your ex is merely trying to rattle you. Next time you are in Walmart perhaps point this out to your kid and, if pharmacist is not busy, have them tell your child it is quite OK for Tylenol to not be refrigerated. Make sure that you and pharmacist tell child that they can ask a pharmacist any time they have a question. Then, later at home, you can show the child information on what a pharmacist does and how they are important to provide information to patients, etc.

I'd deal with the issue (obvious ignorance and superstition) with information and enlightenment.

If you present yourself in the right manner... the pharmacist might agree to phone your ex to reassure her about proper storage of the product.

Last edited by arabian; 02-21-2019 at 12:15 AM.
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Old 02-21-2019, 12:16 AM
tunnelight tunnelight is offline
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lol. yes.. I've become overly too sensitive to her crap. was never like this.

I'm doing the obvious answer thing but it just shit after shit after shit..and then child gets in between and wash..

maybe it's time for some counseling...

or a girlfriend...

hmmm...
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Old 02-21-2019, 12:23 AM
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arabian arabian is offline
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you will have to deal with this for the rest of your life

counselling on how to deal with these issues is certainly an option

we are free though....

GF? Are you able to accept responsibility of someone else's children cause that is typically where single people end up.... middle of other dysfunctional relationships. (yeah I'm not optimistic)

Look into something that will increase your self-esteem: VOLUNTEERING

Find a worthy cause (there are many) that you relate to. You will feel wonderful and it will likely give your life the balance you are seeking. Once you have that balance you will be a much better mate for someone else.
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Old 02-21-2019, 12:26 AM
tunnelight tunnelight is offline
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you're a genius Arabian...

only issue is if I get a noob pharmacist saying it's okay to put it in fridge..could you imagine? Lol

I think child will grow up one day wondering .. who was right.. mom or dad..

I don't understand how ex knows I'm being rattled? Just knows me that well ? I know how to make her go insane too.. mainly by the power of ignorance.. she goes bananas ...


can you just imagine child going to mom.. dad and I talked to pharmacist and we don't have to put it in Fridge..


then I wonder... is mom really that stupid to put in fridge or just trying to sting and cause rattles?))

story of my life
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Old 02-21-2019, 12:31 AM
tunnelight tunnelight is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by arabian View Post
you will have to deal with this for the rest of your life

counselling on how to deal with these issues is certainly an option

we are free though....

GF? Are you able to accept responsibility of someone else's children cause that is typically where single people end up.... middle of other dysfunctional relationships. (yeah I'm not optimistic)

Look into something that will increase your self-esteem: VOLUNTEERING

Find a worthy cause (there are many) that you relate to. You will feel wonderful and it will likely give your life the balance you are seeking. Once you have that balance you will be a much better mate for someone else.

you're absolutely right. last 2 girls I really likes both had 2 kids. one its pending on me to contact her.. I only found about her 2 sons by creeping her on Facebook.. lol..

there is a girl or 2 with no kids , from family friends, that I think would be willing to settle with me but I'm not sure if I'm ready for that type of commitment yet..

used to volunteer lots at school but ever since this 50.50 arrangement... I'm totally getting burnt out... sometimes I wish I just agreed to alternate weekends and one mid week... parenting was so easy back then...but I love having my kid with me.
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Old 02-21-2019, 12:41 AM
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So what if pharmacist says to refrigerate medication. Important lesson will be for kid (who has two dysfunctional parents in life) to learn it is a good thing to ask trusted professionals for assistance no?

Perhaps look at other types of volunteer work (local SPCA, homeless shelter meals, city/community cleanup ?

Move on from things you cannot change. Be a POSITIVE parent when you have the kid. Then you will attract a POSITIVE person into your life perhaps.

Leave electronic devices at home when out with your children: lead by positive example..... life exists outside of Facebook no? If you can't do that then you are doomed to a life of shallow existence (I tell my adult son this frequently... you are not alone LOL).

Plan for future events ... Spring camp... summer camp... winter ski camps... etc.

Life goes on. Who the hell cares about what the ex is doing? Future is fantastic man!
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  #9  
Old 02-21-2019, 12:52 AM
tunnelight tunnelight is offline
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Only use Facebook to creep people I'm curious about..don't really spend too much time on it.. more of an Instagram type of guy

I get on my good vibes and everything good until I give in to the rattles. I have to get stronger and get away from the negativity.. I can do this.

I wouldn't say 2 dysfunctional parents...1 dysfunctional parent is more accurate. Though it only takes 1 dysfunctional parent to ruin it.

Only issue with pharmacists giving inaccurate information against a product label is well, child, you can't trust anyone. do your own research. just checked their site too.. store at room temperature...

life goes on.. I need a good kick in the back.
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  #10  
Old 02-21-2019, 01:02 AM
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You have to broaden your narrow view on things perhaps?

Yes we all disagree with many products prescribed by doctors and yes we disagree on things police do but really ... simple things to kids: Ask the pharmacist and Trust the policeman are pretty reasonable right?

Parents who divorce/separate and who cannot agree on parenting are indeed dysfunctional. Court deals with this every day. Children grow up and need psychological counselling because of their parent's divorce - common even with adults today no?

Children ... future.... school.... college.... how to pay for it all

Lawyers make mega bucks on people who can't get their shit together. Kids suffer in the end because lawyer money depletes kid's college funds.

We are not perfect. Just frustrating to get "the other side" to see the big picture when their lawyer is fueling the fight. I think that is the biggest challenge of all after separation/divorce - how to diffuse the lawyer-ignited entitlement thing and replace with reality,
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