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  #21  
Old 01-05-2012, 03:45 PM
billiechic billiechic is offline
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oops, now you are showing your bias and not focusing on your child"s best interest.

Instead of nitpicking over what she does on her time with D8, why dont you focus on making sure she gets MORE exercise on YOUR time? take her out on the weekend to play ball, bowling, mini-putt, whatever, but stop focussing on HER.

I think staying at home with a new sibling is a GREAT idea, so they can bond and get to know each other. NO WAY are you going to be able to argue that physical activity is more important than bonding with a new family member, so why bother???
  #22  
Old 01-05-2012, 03:47 PM
mylesc mylesc is offline
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my house, we are physically active, swimming, gymanstics, biking you name it, the other, the tv.

now can we get back to the child and the change about to happen.
  #23  
Old 01-05-2012, 03:51 PM
red6419 red6419 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mylesc View Post
now can we get back to the child and the change about to happen.
Yes - #1 you would likely be unsuccessful getting a judge to order what you asked for in the email to you daughters mother. #2 you will likely be unsuccessful in getting your daughters mother to agree to what you asked for in the email you sent. #3 get over it and move on.
  #24  
Old 01-05-2012, 03:54 PM
mylesc mylesc is offline
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wow this site is mostly full of angry people with control issues. very few contstructive comments.
  #25  
Old 01-05-2012, 03:57 PM
Berner_Faith Berner_Faith is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mylesc View Post
you have to be a women...

as said, recently a joint custody arragnement was made, do you have any idea in canada, how bad a women has to be for a man to be awarded primary?

ive always looked out for her best interest and i did it alone for 3 years.

sorry your having a tough time with this conversation but i suggest you move on as your judgement is very biased and not in the best interest of the child.
Actually I do know how hard it is to have a man awarded primary... my bf has joint custody as well, with primary residence with the mom...

Do we agree with everything that goes on at Moms house? Hell no... some of the things that kids do there or don't do there are very hard to deal with...the difference between us is we are able to accept the fact that we have no say in what happens at Mom's...but when the kids are with us, we make sure they bath more than once a week, we make sure they brush their teeth every morning and night...

It seems you are the one who is having the issue with what is best for the child... you are worried about a status quo changing, you are trying to stop your daughter from spending more physical time with Mom and the new baby... I guess since I feel that being raised by a parent is more appropriate than being raised by a babysitter.

Quote:
mcdreamy: lol Berner, you are most definitely not thinking of the best interests of his child! What are you thinking?? How dare you not agree with him?
He must be a man.
I guess no one informed him that not everyone is going to agree with him... shame on me for thinking of the child
  #26  
Old 01-05-2012, 03:58 PM
Berner_Faith Berner_Faith is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mylesc View Post
wow this site is mostly full of angry people with control issues. very few contstructive comments.
Angry? No...

Control? No...

Reality? Yes...

People are not going to sugar coat things...you are not right with this situation...it sucks...but its the truth
  #27  
Old 01-05-2012, 04:00 PM
mylesc mylesc is offline
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you finished?

i hope so cause you obiviously have serious issues. you can leave at any time

im tring to have a discussion about something and am not intrested in your outbursts.

please move on
  #28  
Old 01-05-2012, 04:01 PM
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blinkandimgone blinkandimgone is offline
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You can email her anything you want and ask for anything you want. In reality, you are different people and parent differently. This doesn't mean you can deem yourself the better parent and dictate how the other person will care for the child during their time.

The parallel you're trying to draw between her house and daycare is ludicrous and irrelevant. If you want to hire someone to do specific things with your child then you are well within your rights to expect those things and question if they're being done. You didn't hire your ex, she has as much right to decide how to parent the child as you do and you have ZERO control over it. You just don't.

It's not up to you to decide what they will do at her place, what time they will get up and what/when they will eat.

You can ASK for anything you want, but she is not obligated to agree nor would any court back you up on these issues. I suspect if she did agree it would likely be simply to end the discussion and she would continue to do what she feels is appropriate on her time.

You also have ZERO leverage to enforce any of what you're asking for so unless she willingly agrees, you're out of luck.

P.S. welcome to a PUBLIC forum where anyone can post and you can't control THAT either!
  #29  
Old 01-05-2012, 04:03 PM
Berner_Faith Berner_Faith is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mylesc View Post
you finished?

i hope so cause you obiviously have serious issues. you can leave at any time

im tring to have a discussion about something and am not intrested in your outbursts.

please move on
Don't assume I have "issues" because I don't agree... from the responses you have received no one thinks you are in the right... Not much more you can discuss here.
  #30  
Old 01-05-2012, 04:06 PM
HammerDad HammerDad is offline
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Unfortunately dude, you will most likely lose should you end up in court on this.

Why? Because, unless you can provide valid reasoning that a) your D8's spot will not be maintained should she not regularly attend and b) that is somehow in your D8's best interests that she be cared for by a 3rd party provider instead of their natural parent, you don't have much of an argument.

The courts have regularly determined that time with parents trumps time with 3rd party caregivers (see Right of First Refusal for an example). Further, the courts loath to interfere with how parents parent. So you have the issue of trying to cause your ex to put your daughter in daycare, notwithstanding that it is not your parenting time.

It is kind of likely when a CP registers a child for an activity that requires the NCP to take the child to it...unfortunately for the CP, the NCP is under no obligation to take the child as the CP is not permitted to dictate how the NCP shall parent or what activities the NCP shall attend.

Sorry man, not trying to be difficult with you here, but should you end up in court, there is a good possibility you'd lose. A judge just isn't going to agree with you that your ex shouldn't be permitted to parent as they deem fit unless you can prove that such parenting is putting the child at resk of harm.....and for harm, I mean like they drinking and driving or hanging around known pedophiles and gang members. Sitting around watching TV and playing video games (if you can actually PROVE that is all they do), while it is obviously not your style of parenting (and kodo's to that), isn't going to cut it.
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