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I have been alienated from my child for 3 years. I'm fighting for a relationship with him, but I have no support from the courts. It seems that ex can do pretty much whatever she wants and I have no recourse.
I feel there is some major PAS going on. I wanted to run by this group one of the small and subtle things she has done recently.
I was able to see my son one recent sunday for a few hours. These visits are rare, but occasionally she allows it even though the court order demands it. So she sends our child in with a game she made up herself, handwritten by her. My son wants me to play the game with him and I take out the paper she has written up to start playing with him. He loves Judge Judy and he likes to dress up like a judge and sentence people to the charges laid against them. Those charges and the people ( family and friends) are what is written up on the paper, by ex. So I start to read this paper and notice that she has a charge written up for me on it. Smoking in Public. It says " Daddy is charged with smoking in Public". She has other family members there as well. Uncle Bob is charged with littering and Aunt Susan is charged with Jay Walking.
So here's the signifigance of what she has written up for my charge. Our son is repulsed and hates...absolutely hates, smokers. He will say it to people on the street and he is VERY opinionated about smokers. He is in grade 2.
I knew right away what she was trying to do by putting that in the game for him to play. But I had no idea that it would work so well for her. Here's what I mean:
The mediator involved recently suggested to ex that I come to her house to pick up our son and take him out instead of what has been happening all along ( due to ex's insistance) which is her dropping our son off at a family members house for our visits. Yesterday was the first time that we tried this. I showed up at her house and she brought our son to my car and forced her way into the backseat to get him strapped in ( apparently she thinks I'm not capable of doing this! ) and my child immediately said " why does your car smell like smoke?" I told him that it didn't and I just didn't know why he would say that because I dont' smoke and no one has ever smoked in my car. Ex had this &%#$%! dirty grin on her face when she heard him say this.
I proceeded to drive away with my child in the backseat and he started asking me if I smoked. I told him no again. I asked him why he asked me that when he knows that daddy doesn't smoke. He couldn't answer me.
We had a couple of hours together and I returned him to his mothers. When I brought him to the door his mother asked him if he had fun and he said yes, but that he would not go with me again because my car smells like smoke!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
There you go. So I need some opinions here. This is the kind of thing she's been doing for a long time. It's all this subtle stuff which I believe is parental alienation. Intentional PA. I would love some feedback. Keep in mind that I do not smoke and my car DOES NOT smell like smoke. How did this child come to believe that he smelled smoke in my car?
Feedback?
I feel there is some major PAS going on. I wanted to run by this group one of the small and subtle things she has done recently.
I was able to see my son one recent sunday for a few hours. These visits are rare, but occasionally she allows it even though the court order demands it. So she sends our child in with a game she made up herself, handwritten by her. My son wants me to play the game with him and I take out the paper she has written up to start playing with him. He loves Judge Judy and he likes to dress up like a judge and sentence people to the charges laid against them. Those charges and the people ( family and friends) are what is written up on the paper, by ex. So I start to read this paper and notice that she has a charge written up for me on it. Smoking in Public. It says " Daddy is charged with smoking in Public". She has other family members there as well. Uncle Bob is charged with littering and Aunt Susan is charged with Jay Walking.
So here's the signifigance of what she has written up for my charge. Our son is repulsed and hates...absolutely hates, smokers. He will say it to people on the street and he is VERY opinionated about smokers. He is in grade 2.
I knew right away what she was trying to do by putting that in the game for him to play. But I had no idea that it would work so well for her. Here's what I mean:
The mediator involved recently suggested to ex that I come to her house to pick up our son and take him out instead of what has been happening all along ( due to ex's insistance) which is her dropping our son off at a family members house for our visits. Yesterday was the first time that we tried this. I showed up at her house and she brought our son to my car and forced her way into the backseat to get him strapped in ( apparently she thinks I'm not capable of doing this! ) and my child immediately said " why does your car smell like smoke?" I told him that it didn't and I just didn't know why he would say that because I dont' smoke and no one has ever smoked in my car. Ex had this &%#$%! dirty grin on her face when she heard him say this.
I proceeded to drive away with my child in the backseat and he started asking me if I smoked. I told him no again. I asked him why he asked me that when he knows that daddy doesn't smoke. He couldn't answer me.
We had a couple of hours together and I returned him to his mothers. When I brought him to the door his mother asked him if he had fun and he said yes, but that he would not go with me again because my car smells like smoke!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
There you go. So I need some opinions here. This is the kind of thing she's been doing for a long time. It's all this subtle stuff which I believe is parental alienation. Intentional PA. I would love some feedback. Keep in mind that I do not smoke and my car DOES NOT smell like smoke. How did this child come to believe that he smelled smoke in my car?
Feedback?
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