Wills and guardianship.

[takeontheworld]

I have sole custody of my d9. Her father/my ex has more or less abandoned her...he moved overseas but we don't have an address, only the country, and an e mail address. He has not seen her in almost 4 years and pays no cs. He will call her or e mail once every few months. Given all this info, if anything were to happen to me and I have requested my parents to have guardianship who she has a close relationship with, would my request carry and weight or would she automatically be sent to a country she does not know and for the most part a father that she does not know?

[HammerDad]

I have sole custody of my d9. Her father/my ex has more or less abandoned her...he moved overseas but we don't have an address, only the country, and an e mail address. He has not seen her in almost 4 years and pays no cs. He will call her or e mail once every few months. Given all this info, if anything were to happen to me and I have requested my parents to have guardianship who she has a close relationship with, would my request carry and weight or would she automatically be sent to a country she does not know and for the most part a father that she does not know?

Your Will would stand until contested.

Your ex may challenge it being that he is next-of-kin, and a guardian of the child. Whether or not he is successful would really depend on the circumstances and the judge.

You cannot Will away another individuals rights. However, if the ex does nothing or allows status quo to build, then their arguments why they should be provided custody of the child diminishes.

I know my ex has it in her Will that my D8 goes to her parents. My lawyer and other lawyers all said that part isn't worth the paper it is printed on. Although, I am actively involved in my D8's life and always have been. However, being active still may not help me should my ex unfortunately pass and I do nothing to act on my rights. To be honest, and I know this going to sound cold, but there only be barely a few shovel's of dirt on my ex's body before I had my kid.

[takeontheworld]

To be honest, and I know this going to sound cold, but there only be barely a few shovel's of dirt on my ex's body before I had my kid.

It actually doesn't sound cold.

[BitHunter]

How can my rosiest dream sound cold??

But back to the original question: Maybe your ex is a bad father because he is not allowed to be a good father. How about you send him an email and ask him if he wants custody and willing to be a good father in case you pass away? Willing away his right might create years of misery and court fight for your parents and uncertainty for your child after you die, simply by asking your ex could prevent that and you can rest in peace.

[takeontheworld]

Hes a bad parent because he chooses to be. As adults we need to take responsibility for our own actions. Nevertheless im past the point as is my child of asking him to see her or call or even mailing a letter. Ive sat through a a letter. Ive cried for my child when he tells her to meet on skype and he doesnt show up. I would love for my child to have a loving relationship with her father. He had two wives...he doesnt provide cs for his daughter because I initiated a divorce. Then he had a son. He's a bad father because he choses to be.
My parents would be devastated if she had to move with him. They would be more than willing to deal with the legal ramifications.

[Berner_Faith]

It is unfortunate, but like was pointed out, if he contests you will, there is little your parents can do. The fact that he was a bad father, doesn't change the fact he is her father. If that day comes before your child is a teenager, he has very good chances of having custody of her, however once she is a teenager, he doesn't have much room to argue.

[wretchedotis]

"Dad" would get custody - if he fought for it.