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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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Old 01-12-2012, 10:59 AM
audible audible is offline
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Default Mediation tomorrow, please help...

G'day all.

I have posted here before with great advice and direction. I am here again and will try and make it as short as possible, but any questions in reply will certainly be answered.

I self represented myself with lawyer assistance for direction and paper work. Final order was signed in June 2009. I mistakenly and not knowingly did not have a clause in there that the final order may be rieviewed at a later date. The final order was signed for our then 1 year old daughter and wrritne up to accomodate her age and my ex's shift work schedule.

In a nutshel. Daughter was 1 and I had every Wednesday access for 2 hours, every second Saturday full day access, and every other second week fro Thursday - Saturday (2 overnights) to accomodate ex's night shifts.

Since then the final order was mutually amended to include Many other over night stays including every Friday and every second Wednesday's etc.

I also attended every Dr appt, every daycare activity, stayed home with daughter on numerous occasions while daughter was sick and ever drove daughter to and from daycare every day for over a year, as ex did not have a car. Those drives stopped once she got a live in boyfriend, even at my own request to continue to drive her as my daughter and I created that daily bond.

Over time, as the ex got hostile she took away all extra time and over nights that I got from her.

In Sep 2011 I had enough and was not happy with going back to the original final order. I contacted a lawyer and made it clear the bond and strong daily routines and relationships my daughter and I have. I made it perfectly clear my intentions were to gradually get back on my feet while being an every day part of our daughters life and wanted to pursue 50/50 access.

Oct 2011 after a meeting with our lawyers, my lawyer did not fight for me at all and told me to accept their proposal of every Wednesday night from 4pm to Thursday morning 7:45 drop off at day care. As well as EOW from Fri 3pm to Monday 7:45am drop off at day care. Turned out to be 5/14 days (and nights). He said accept that generous offer and put a clause in the offer that it can be reviewed in the new year and to jointly retain a mediator to discuss our parenting issues. Everything has gone beyond well for the 2 months and here we are.

We will start mediation tomorrow, and I don't see her budging to my requests of 50/50 parenting which I think is the best interest of our daughter. I deserve the right to equally raise our daughter. She is is no harm and we have established and maintained a strong relationship in anyway. I plan on proposing a 2/2/3 schedule. Having said that she will probably deny it as being greedy and power happy is what she will lose without taking into considerations the relationship of our daughter and I.

Do I have a strong case of material changes in circumstance or stats quo?

We have obviously outgrown the original final order.

*daughter is now 4 and not 1 years old.
*ex does not work shift work
*final order was written up for general access to a 1 year old and shift work
*schedule was been changed to allow more time and over nights based on personal needs and wants, we both have varied it and really no longer applies

I have proof of every extra visit, access, appt activity etc since day 1.

Is this enough tomake her and the mediator and possible a judge realize? I am a good guy and father. Never been in trouble with the law and have never and would never put our daughter in danger. I just want to raise my daughter equally and provide all that I can for her.

Please advise and help....

Thanks
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