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  • Ugh.

    I received a call from CAS yesterday. They are involved with me and my ex for some time now - as conflict has been an issue from day 1.

    Anyways, the lady tells me she needs to see me, and suggests we meet this morning. All night I'm wondering... She has never insisted we meet so quickly before.

    This morning we meet, and she tells me my ex's husband called the police claiming sexual innappropriatness between myself and my five year old son.

    Six months ago he charged me with Uttering Threats (bogus).

    Like... what's a guy to do?

  • #2
    Whats a guy to do? lol join the club. At least you got an interview. What did the CAS lady suggest? Stopping your access while they investigate?

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    • #3
      Nope. She was dealing with it after the fact. The Police were called. They intervieed my 5 year old son, and came to the conclusion it was a non-issue. No doubt they have an obligation to report the incident to CAS. The worker and I see eye to eye on just what exactly the problem is with respect to conflict between parties. She explained to me that the police were very thorough, and that in reading their report the cop (who was a woman) handled it very well. I guess the cop was very tactful and considerte to the child in her questioning of him.

      All she suggested was that given the criminal charge, and this recent event - that I should temper my response/reaction.

      In other words, don't make it worse by making it an arguement with my ex.

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      • #4
        Try and get the CAS worker to write a letter about this, and get the police report as well.

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        • #5
          Definitely get the police report from the officer, AND try and get the CAS worker to write something as well.

          Then file a motion in the court to have your son's contact with the ex's new husband limited based on the false allegations and interference with your parenting time.

          Perhaps that he cannot be left alone with your son, your wife MUST be present during her time with the child. It's a pain in the ass for her more than anything, but if you can then prove it's not being followed, you can further request to modify custody.

          Look at this as a gift, they are providing you with an opening to further cement or increase your parenting time.

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          • #6
            I've followed up with the police dept it was reported to.
            Been given some further details I was not aware of, and told as the ex and I live in seperte police jurasdictions - she (the police) have handed the investigtion off to the jurasdiction I live in (where the incident allegedly occurred), with her reccomendation that no further investigation was required.
            So I guess I may or may not still get a visit from the police.

            Sad to hear my boy had to attend the local police station, and be interviewed while being video taped. Furthermore, a CAS representative was in the next room watching the recording as it occured.

            That must have been a terribly frightening experience for a 5 year old.
            I am not looking forward to the inevitable questions.

            I spoke with my CAS worker this morning, and asked her opinion of how I should handle this with the boy. She suggested I do not question him on it, as that would just place more importance on the experience for him. But rather, take it in stride and answer any questions in an age appropriate manner.
            Sure is nice to be able to type this all out and organise my thoughts.
            Thanks for listening.

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            • #7
              Call the Law Society. You can get a free referral for every separate "case", meaning if you already used the free service for you divorce, you can get a free hour with a lawyer with this incident.

              I would seek advice on what recourse you have against the false accusations. Libel, slander, harrassment? It would seem to me it falls under any of those. Ask for a specialist in civil litigation for harrassment and libel. At the very least find out if you have a case, or what it would take on their part for you to have a case.

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              • #8
                Yeah. I was talking to a close personal friend earlier in the day who suggested the same thing. But you know what? Whats that really going to do? This Ass is the father of my son's half brother and soon to be a second shalf-sibling. He lives with them. I could persue that on a civil basis - but to what end? Furthering the problems for all the kids involved for the next 20 years?!? No thanks.

                Now in the last 6 months to a year this man has proved himself to be a complete ass. But as of right now it hasn't really impinged upon me too much. My son suffers, I guess. Another instance or two - and yes.... maybe some sort of remedy is required. But for now, maybe its best just to lay low and see what happens.

                Comment

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