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  • negotiating child support

    Does everyone pay as per the table amount for child support? Due to some recent changes my ex now has both our children living with him. Previously we both had one child each and there was no cs being paid. I want to help as much as possible but the full table amount seems quite high, I wouldn't even be able to afford gas in the car to get to work.

    I've read through many of the posts and it seems like everyone is paying full table amount. Has no one been able to negotiate with the ex for an amount that is more reasonable? My ex is also saying that FRO has to be involved, wouldn't it be easier to pay direct?

  • #2
    How much time do they spend with you? Are they living full time with him? Or do they spend half their time with you? FRO doesnt have to be involved. If you can work together and make payments on time then you can just pay him directly.

    If they are with him full time with access to you then yes you have to pay the table amount of support.

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    • #3
      Of course anything is negotiable, but know that if it goes in front of a judge, they will be looking for table. That is what you should be planning on. I think all of us payors had to go through a dramatic downsizing of lifestyle. I had to move into a basement apartment from the matrimonial house.

      As for FRO, if one of the people involved want FRO, then they can get FRO whether you agree or not.

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      • #4
        We all pay the table amount (or offset if shared custody) and we're all broke. I take the bus to work.

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        • #5
          The kids are with me every other weekend and occasionally I see them through the week depending on our schedules.

          My ex is a "by the book" kind of person so I guess I should take another look at my budget and try cutting something out...not sure what. I had a huge downsize of lifestyle the moment I walked out the door. I already live in a basement apartment and the only reason I have a car is to get to work, there is no bus service where I live/work. 45 km to work on my bicycle might not work on a snowy -24 day like today!

          What is FRO like to deal with? Wouldn't it be better for the recipient to deal directly with the payor instead of waiting for payoll dept and FRO to process the payments? I was thinking a monthly payment through an e-transfer would work well.

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          • #6
            The only negotiation you can do right now to reduce is if you have 50/50. Then one of you would be paying off set.

            To go with FRO you would need a court order for support. If your last order showed him paying you, youll need that updated to a new order for support between the two of you. If you dont have 50/50 then it will be full table support.

            Once you have that order it gets filed with FRO and the payor pays them like a bill.

            FRO isnt as bad for my partner as he thought. Sure its an inconvenience and calculating S7 and paying is a pain but overall its working. He has a good caseworker, pays on time and meets the obligations in their oder. The only problem right now is hes out of work and not making the amount in the order but is hopeful he will find work soon which would prompt a new support order to be filed.

            Its tough paying support. You have to change a great deal of your lifestyle. His income from a part time job is paying for his support.

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            • #7
              I've not had an issue with FRO though others have. My ex hasn't asked for S7. They worked with me when my son left his mom's to live with me.

              They don't garnish your wages unless you don't pay. I do electronic transfers to them through online banking, works well.

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              • #8
                The only issue with S7 is that if you dont have a specific order for the items, it gets confusing because anything can be submitted and they accept it. My partner had to dispute the most recent claims as they werent calculated properly.

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                • #9
                  If you both agree to a lower amount, and you keep it out of court, c/s can be lower than table amounts. But should it ever end up in court, c/s will likely be based off of the guideline amount.

                  Do you and your ex have the same annual income? If one of you makes more, than one of you should've been paying offset c/s during the time when you each had custody of one of your children. So if your ex makes more than you, you should've been receiving some c/s from them. If that was the case, you may be able to use that as a negotiation tactic when discussing c/s going forward. That you were willing to accept no c/s when you were entitled to it, that they should be willing to accept a lower amount for a transition period, than full c/s going forward.

                  The ex may not agree, and if they don't you're FUBAR'd. Because a judge likely won't take into consideration past entitlements you both agreed to waive when determining c/s going forward.

                  Edit - I pay guideline. Money was tight initially but I adjusted and worked hard to increase my income. Yeah, I pay more in c/s because of my efforts, but I live more comfortably as well.
                  Last edited by HammerDad; 02-05-2015, 01:37 PM.

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                  • #10
                    Thanks for the info.

                    I'm going to look into making some additional money somewhere, maybe a part time job, my full time job is salary and doesn't allow for any extra. The only issue with part time work is it interfering with my time with the kids. Going to take some juggling. Hopefully the ex will negotiate a small bit, even $50-80 a month would help immensely.

                    I had thought about taking a small income from my investments but noticed another thread that says that will be included in c/s calculation so that's a no go.

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                    • #11
                      The part time job income will impact cs as well. Any income you make is the income used for cs calculations.

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by rockscan View Post
                        The part time job income will impact cs as well. Any income you make is the income used for cs calculations.
                        Very true. But even after tax and c/s is taken off the top, any $$ left over may make it easier for the OP to live.

                        Just because the ex gets a piece, doesn't mean it won't help.

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                        • #13
                          You would need to claim undue hardship. The first step is to complete and very thorough Form 13 Financial Statement. Show your expenses. have the backup documentation. Receipts, Visa, bank statements etc. Then include the table amount of CS per your income. If it is negative balance and you can sustantiate your figures you may be able to ask for a reduction.

                          Do you have to travel to see the children? Is this a significant amount?

                          Make a budget and proceed from there. FRO is slow, but will work with you on many levels.

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