Hi there:
I am in a bit of a different situation than all of you here, but I am looking for support and guidance.
I have joint custody of my granddaughter (2.5 yrs) and I am the primary home. Mother has EOW and a clause that states any other time with 24 hr notice. No CS and she collects all the CTB.
When my granddaughter came into my care (Oct 2009) I took a parental leave from work. Mother was not very involved.
Upon returning to work (Sept 2010) I needed to find daycare. Mother was not working but was not interested in full time parenting on a regular basis. I ended up enrolling granddaughter into private Montessori and gave Mother many opportunities to talk to school and encouraged her to have a tour. She did not. I paid for Montessori myself. I collect no money from Mother of child.
Over the last 2 years Mother has flitted in and out of her life, lived in many homes. no work, no school.
Mothers new Boyfriend and pregnant Mother lived with us Jan-May 2011 and Mother only had a small interest in caring for child and never said anything about child being in school or offered to care for her even when sick. I was still was the primary caretaker. (and love every minute of it)
Fast Forward to now.
Recently had a baby and is living with boyfriend in boyfriend parents house. Neither are working or going to school. Mother is starting to visit with more regularity since Sept 2011. I asked for a portion of the CTB (she gets max amount) to help pay for extra expenses (school is part arts school as well - so wanted to cover some extra expenses such as uniform shirt or dance slippers - minor things)I was refused any monies.. The next day she served a motion for sole custody and wants to pull granddaughter out of Montessori to be with her during the day.
Is it a valid argument that because of past behaviour and inconsistency, the granddaughter should remain in school while she is in my primary home (I know I have no control or say if she does get sole custody). I am worried that if she responsible for granddaughter during my work hrs, I can possibly end up losing my job due to her not showing up for care, or wanting to only watch her when convenient.
As well - I am open to increased access/residency at this time in order to see if she is serious about full time care of grandchild but I am not comfortable with Mother having sole custody.
Any suggestions? Am I being reasonable?
Thanks,
Gmama (way too young )
I am in a bit of a different situation than all of you here, but I am looking for support and guidance.
I have joint custody of my granddaughter (2.5 yrs) and I am the primary home. Mother has EOW and a clause that states any other time with 24 hr notice. No CS and she collects all the CTB.
When my granddaughter came into my care (Oct 2009) I took a parental leave from work. Mother was not very involved.
Upon returning to work (Sept 2010) I needed to find daycare. Mother was not working but was not interested in full time parenting on a regular basis. I ended up enrolling granddaughter into private Montessori and gave Mother many opportunities to talk to school and encouraged her to have a tour. She did not. I paid for Montessori myself. I collect no money from Mother of child.
Over the last 2 years Mother has flitted in and out of her life, lived in many homes. no work, no school.
Mothers new Boyfriend and pregnant Mother lived with us Jan-May 2011 and Mother only had a small interest in caring for child and never said anything about child being in school or offered to care for her even when sick. I was still was the primary caretaker. (and love every minute of it)
Fast Forward to now.
Recently had a baby and is living with boyfriend in boyfriend parents house. Neither are working or going to school. Mother is starting to visit with more regularity since Sept 2011. I asked for a portion of the CTB (she gets max amount) to help pay for extra expenses (school is part arts school as well - so wanted to cover some extra expenses such as uniform shirt or dance slippers - minor things)I was refused any monies.. The next day she served a motion for sole custody and wants to pull granddaughter out of Montessori to be with her during the day.
Is it a valid argument that because of past behaviour and inconsistency, the granddaughter should remain in school while she is in my primary home (I know I have no control or say if she does get sole custody). I am worried that if she responsible for granddaughter during my work hrs, I can possibly end up losing my job due to her not showing up for care, or wanting to only watch her when convenient.
As well - I am open to increased access/residency at this time in order to see if she is serious about full time care of grandchild but I am not comfortable with Mother having sole custody.
Any suggestions? Am I being reasonable?
Thanks,
Gmama (way too young )
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