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  • Ready to give up with justice system

    5 yrs in court over 100k spent which could have gone for the well being of our family,ex self employed stopped paying CS approx 3 months ago, paid 10k over the past 3 years, makes over 170k per year, sold 4 properties since I started proceedings in 2018, first Case confrence in Oct 2020 due to delays on his end, , ex ordered to have income evaluation and provide significant disclosure dating back 6 years, 1.5 years later since evaluation started i still don't have a preliminary report on his income, hence motion filed due to not cooperating with evaluator, CS was entered into consent in early 2020, kid needs braces I asked if he'd cover 1/2 and was told child support is enough although I don't receive it, he's not cooperating with FRO or the evaluator , money hidden from sales of properties via wire transfers, just vanished, the worst is he is a dead beat dad that has alot of money and prolong and destroy another party financially, so sad, bad faith is an understatement, such a frustrating process to get even some justice, and the cost associated with it is beyond ludicrous, btw he states he makes 40k/ per year

  • #2
    You should count yourself lucky. You’ve ONLY been litigating for 5 years. Try over 10 years and still not over. My situation has many similarities to yours my ex is high conflict and has dragged out proceedings for over 10 years. My ex has used his money as a war chest . We started in regular court then I let my lawyer convince me to try med/arb because he said it would be faster and cheaper. If you have a high conflict, unreasonable ex like mine, do not, I repeat, do not under any circumstances switch to med/arbitration. He fraudulently concealed his assets unbeknownst to me, my lawyer or the arbitrator but there are remedies for that. His assets are now frozen. Our arbitration is over and I am hoping for an award by the end of the year. Then there is collecting my settlement which may or may not be another adventure.

    So five years is nothing. I wish my matter had settled 5 years ago. If your ex is unreasonable and continues to drag things out you should realize you are in this for the long haul and take precautions accordingly. Take care of yourself and live in the present. Do what you have to in order to preserve your sanity and mental health, I started nicknaming all my ex’s lawyers. There was Mr Manure. MrLAL, Mr P-Envy, to name a few. This helped me view it as a really bad B comedy script vs real life and was only one of the techniques I used to keep my sanity all these years.
    Last edited by Stillbreathing; 06-10-2022, 09:06 PM.

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    • #3
      I hate to break it to you but you married and had children with a man who turned his back on another woman and his kid(s). You should have done some due diligence. You also should have done some homework on the process and also made some hard decisions on what you would accept financially. Even if he had piles of money and assets etc., his first wife is entitled to them to. In fact she may be entitled to them first.

      Your best bet is to look at the cost/benefit of continuing to fight for the moon and see what you will settle for. Have an income imputed to him for child support, a set amount monthly for s7 and cut your losses. You are obviously spending money you don’t have to get nothing.

      And I say this as a child of a woman who married a man who had turned his back on his first family and then turned his back on us. We paid for everything including household expenses. My mom worked and did her best. There was no FRO back then and we had no options. If someone doesn’t want to pay, they won’t. The only thing you can do is get an order you can file with FRO and hope they will be able to recover funds eventually. I am friends with one former poster who is owes $200,000 by her ex. He has just started working with FRO to pay it as he is old and wants his CPP.

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      • #4
        Im sorry you are going through this

        The difference for me is she ran out of money and next step is securities

        But she is willing to mediate or will go bankrupt

        If I was in your position, I would be quite upset. Was there any thought of contempt or taking the route of having his pleadings struck and an imputed income.

        I don’t understand how it can be so difficult to get disclosure

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        • #5
          If there is already an order for him to disclose financials, and he does not have a good excuse not to disclose, he should at least be imputed minimum wage and pay child support based off that for now. You should go to court asking for the judge to enforce the court order in some way such as fined, jail time, or another very short extension as a last chance to disclose…and then you should immediately follow up again. Also the agency in your province that enforces and helps get payments from your ex should be doing things to get money out of him. Special expenses might be a bit more of a process. In my experience child support requires only the ex who pays to produce information if you have the children full time…pretty simple. Then all of the other stuff is a bit more of a process unfortunately. Child support should be a quick straight forward process…maybe deal with that first, seems like there is a lot going on.
          Last edited by undersc0re; 06-11-2022, 02:23 PM.

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