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  • Conferences are meaningless..it's good you listen to the OP "platform" it gives you good clues to where they are going......even the stupid GASPS

    Divide everything you've paid by 20 years (when D3 is a adult).....it's a cheap price for SOLE custody

    This saved my mental wellbeing a 100 years ago.

    Upfront is BLOWS

    Arabians right your dealing with a welfare bum.....who will always be one.

    It's the arseholes that listen to her that really suck. (at there jobs)

    Unknowingly your learning....teach somebody to fish....stuff

    You'll be a force to reckon with soon (after your first Trial)

    Goldilocks won't learn a thing....being a liar opportunist goes only so far...actually it was STOPPED DEAD at the Motion.

    which was about 8 months after she booked.

    9th month the (lazy dummy) Judge.....sweeped you both out the door

    Your lawyer said what 2 years?....I can't remember..but March is 1 year 1 month

    No more fuking around after next Conference, lets decide this and get to Trial

    Your going to suffer the most foolish negative things on your parenting by the EX in the meanwhile.

    WHO's going to care?......is the next Conference judge going too...NOPE...Trial judge will sleep through it.

    A kid has nightmares.....seems like a case of WHAT ARE both parents doing about it....oh I see....Goldilocks does fukall by documents it....HOW BOUT THAT

    Parents usually work together and suggest stuff to ease a child's issues.....not Goldilocks

    LF32 your doing what any divorce guy does....you read EX's "opened ended" problem and rush around filling in the blanks.

    Goldilocks has LOST....she know's it....the LAO scumbag lawyer hopes your stupid and doesn't understand a Trial or the various Acts

    It's okay to dabble in the confusion of EX purposely putting a crap coat on D3...but you need a WORLDVIEW

    I still don't know the particulars of the SC/TMC endorsement

    Lot's of lawyers get on and off the fence.....to save clients money.....are/is it necessary for your lawyer to be at next conference.....and is it a SC...or TMC

    Motion Judge gave you the win at Trial

    Secret recordings (dumped).....OCL (killed herself)...allegations after EX took off (dumped).......no Trial needed

    It comes down to Parenting Plans.....and confirming the EX is a game player with no fixed address.

    This is the endgame that you don't see...MOP UP

    No Job after a year....on purpose
    crapola kid issues she does squat about...just points a finger
    exchanges....but only on her end
    No extended family OLD GOAT...in area

    for Trial she had post partum...anti depressants

    is a stoner and drunk

    both of you dropped D1 or D2 off at gammies to party

    she earned before D...this much money a year

    she plotted since 2013 to get rid of you

    she's a flight risk....needed it ordered she stay in town

    etc

    Comment


    • Clock is ticking and I would think that the 'status quo' is indeed in play.

      Next conference is in March 2015? Things are going swell...

      Comment


      • Night terrors are normal at three. Told to my sister when my niece went through it. She would scream in her sleep about toys and kids at daycare. Two loving parents no fighting in the home. Know what cured it? Turns out she had to pee but was sleeping. When she would start screaming they would take her to the bathroom and she settled back down. Three is when their imaginations start going crazy. Im sure you can find LOTS of child development stuff to counter this crap.

        Comment


        • Schools:

          On my to-do list was to check out Fraser institute website and compare schools in my area to schools in ex's area.

          3 school within my boundary (all having early French immersion) rated:

          1. 7.2
          2. 7.2
          3. 6.0 (D7 goes to this one and would take her under her wing).
          4. The one I work at: 7.6 (but further away)

          The schools in ex's boundary: (she lives in roughest part of city)

          1. 3.2
          2. 5.7
          3. 3.2
          4. 0

          I would really like to see D3 get in to junior kindergarten next year and would like to begin preparing her. Ex is strongly against this with her ridiculous claims of attachment, behavioral issues, etc.

          How should I approach this with ex...in court, etc? Since SC judge said D3 already had huge changes (access with me, etc) and said daycare not a good idea because of that .. I should probably wait to bring this up then I suppose?

          Another thing ... we live a good 20 mins away from one another. Not even in the same catchment area at all.

          Comment


          • Originally posted by LovingFather32 View Post
            ...
            I would really like to see D3 get in to junior kindergarten next year and would like to begin preparing her. Ex is strongly against this with her ridiculous claims of attachment, behavioral issues, etc...

            How should I approach this with ex...in court, etc? Since SC judge said D3 already had huge changes (access with me, etc) and said daycare not a good idea because of that .. I should probably wait to bring this up then I suppose?

            Another thing ... we live a good 20 mins away from one another. Not even in the same catchment area at all.
            What does your lawyer say about this? I would present this to your lawyer, and state why you want this (seems like good reasons), and get her take on this. I think you have better chance advocating for this, then the ex would have, trying to convince why school is not good idea.

            I think, in your situation, JK/SK will be absolutely necessary. JK/SK is not "daycare" - it's school. Sure, it's basically school run daycare/activites, more than school learning at that age, but there is still some going on, and it seems to me, that if your daughter actually had "attachment" issues (which it seems she does not), what better way to address those issues, or make sure there aren't any, by having her interact with friends/peers in JK/SK, and also to get teacher/school saying "she seems to do well...we don't see any issues at school". That is probably something to focus on...daughter's ability to interact with peers, and have a "neutral" spot.

            Get your lawyer's take on this. Seems to me, that D3's best interests are served, if she and her parents can simply start on a settled routine now, rather than putting things on hold, just to change later (or for your nutter ex to have "new reasons" later on, to argue against settling on routine).

            If it were me, I would insist on JK/SK.
            (FYI, I did do this, but didn't have to fight for that, in court. It was odd that I had to insist on D going to JK/SK, since ex already got full table support...just a control thing I guess).
            Last edited by dad2bandm; 12-16-2014, 12:47 PM. Reason: Finished thought.

            Comment


            • FYI, in my particular case, I saw huge improvements in D's behaviour, when she started JK. This was probably because she was in a structured routine, focused on her development (she had a JK teacher, that stuck with her in SK too, and really concentrated on her), learning, having her interact with all the classmates (beyond just siblings), and that really teached her to become more social, and caring towards her peers.

              (at Mom's house, she was stuck watching cartoons all day).

              Comment


              • I wouldn't bother with what the SC/TMC Judge thinks (unless it's in the endorsement) The Motion ended to close to the SC/TMC date..so common sense dictates getting some history on access in ...and also to find out who is high conflict.

                For Trial (unless OP smartens up)

                This Custody stuff has to be approached from more than a few angles and all angles must be covered.

                I imagine Judges apply ' a series of tests" to the parents and if each parent answers the question correctly then the next test is given.

                1) Can the parties get along? Why not?

                LF32 you have to know the exact definition in CLRA for best interest of child and being a parent

                I like what you wrote ....I would really like to see D3 get in to junior kindergarten .....the reason I like that sentence is a parenting plan is a presentation it's kinda like a road map making a best bizzness case on good stuff for a child all at the same time ...with no hard selling.

                LF32 where is Education? on being a Custodial Parent

                http://divorce-canada.ca/child-custody-in-canada




                When determining child custody in Canada a judge will consider items such as:
                • First and foremost the best interest of the children.
                • The parent-child relationship and bonding.
                • Parenting abilities of each individual.
                • Each parent’s mental, physical and emotional health.
                • The typical schedule of both parents and children.
                • Available support systems of each parent (for example, help and involvement of grandparents or other close relatives).
                • Sibling issues. Generally, brothers and sisters will be kept together, but under some circumstances it may be necessary to consider separating them.
                • Care arrangements before the separation. Who was the primary care giver?
                • The child’s wishes. The Office of the Children’s Lawyer is often appointed by the court to help in determining the child’s wishes. Once a child turns 12 years of age, his or her wishes to live with one parent or another are usually respected by the courts.
                When determining child custody the past behavior of a parent will not be taken into consideration by the courts, unless their behavior reflects directly on the individual’s ability to act as a parent.


                LF32 education is a sub topic in CLRA ..best interests of child stuff ....it isn't a MAIN TOPIC for a parent applying technically for child custody.

                Types of Child Custody in Canada:
                • Sole Custody – This is when one parent has custody of the children. In this case, the child always resides permanently with the parent having sole custody and the other parent may have access visits.
                • Joint Custody – This is where both parents have custody. This is also known as joint legal custody. Courts will normally only awards this type of custody to parents who are able to cooperate on parenting matters. While parents may have joint custody, the residency/access arrangements for the children may vary widely.
                • Shared Custody – This is when both parents have joint custody of the children, and both parents spend at least 40% of the time with their children. This is also known as joint physical custody.
                • Split Custody – This is when one parent has custody of some of the children, and the other parent has custody of the remaining children. Courts try to never split up up younger children from their siblings. However, older siblings often choose to live with different parents
                Goldilocks may of slandered the heck out of you personally LF32....but has she shown ANY ability to cooperate on parenting matters (bold highlight from above) with D3?

                IF not then Goldilocks won't even be able to make JOINT work.

                Goldilocks has no backup plan if the SLANDER fails, she is not even considering the word JOINT.

                Always be low conflict....reasonable...document everything...always offer ways to settle...cover every angle from various ACTS and glean Case Law for info
                Last edited by MrToronto; 12-16-2014, 03:36 PM.

                Comment


                • Another communication book entry full of issues with D3. Need advice on how to respond.

                  - Ex says D3 is having difficulty with transitions(counting sleeps until she gets to see me). She says it stresses her out. We don't have that issue here. She counts the "sleeps" on her fingers until she sees her mom. I feel like telling her "You kept her from me for a long time with no contact. She's probably worried you're doing it again. But I know I can't say that. Ex says we should just tell her the night before. Again, we have no issues with this here.


                  - Still going on about night terrors and sleepless nights. Don't really know what to say. She sleeps like a rock here. Also asking about a bruise on her ear .. saying D3 cant remember what its from. Never seen that before. And did her hair the last morning she was here. She's 3 .. bruises happen.

                  I did call a family svc organization and told them that D3 had been reportedly acting up in Ex's care and inquired about an assessment. They said to have ex call since it was occurring in her care. I haven't mentioned this to ex because I don't need her going in with "invented tapes" and nightmares of abuse, etc. I'd like to be part of it so she cant swindle anything.

                  Advice Please?

                  I'd like a good response. This is part of her plan to say this isn't working and D3 is misbehaving because of visits with me and prepping for transitions aren't working.

                  Again, I see this as an "environmental" issue as no issues as such are occurring here.

                  Oh yes .. and now I have BENEFITS. and great ones. I wonder what kindof deal I can get with a child psych.
                  Last edited by LovingFather32; 12-17-2014, 05:51 PM.

                  Comment


                  • What about a calendar visual where she can cross off days daily and count the amount of days until a visit. Like an advent calendar. Sounds like she's missing me and doesn't want the wait.

                    Comment


                    • Originally posted by LovingFather32 View Post
                      Another communication book entry full of issues with D3. Need advice on how to respond.

                      - Ex says D3 is having difficulty with transitions(counting sleeps until she gets to see me). She says it stresses her out. We don't have that issue here. She counts the "sleeps" on her fingers until she sees her mom. I feel like telling her "You kept her from me for a long time with no contact. She's probably worried you're doing it again. But I know I can't say that. Ex says we should just tell her the night before. Again, we have no issues with this here.


                      - Still going on about night terrors and sleepless nights. Don't really know what to say. She sleeps like a rock here. Also asking about a bruise on her ear .. saying D3 cant remember what its from. Never seen that before. And did her hair the last morning she was here. She's 3 .. bruises happen.

                      I did call a family svc organization and told them that D3 had been reportedly acting up in Ex's care and inquired about an assessment. They said to have ex call since it was occurring in her care. I haven't mentioned this to ex because I don't need her going in with "invented tapes" and nightmares of abuse, etc. I'd like to be part of it so she cant swindle anything.

                      Advice Please?

                      I'd like a good response. This is part of her plan to say this isn't working and D3 is misbehaving because of visits with me and prepping for transitions aren't working.

                      Again, I see this as an "environmental" issue as no issues as such are occurring here.

                      Oh yes .. and now I have BENEFITS. and great ones. I wonder what kindof deal I can get with a child psych.
                      Your ex is on the back foot here. Nothing she says in court will ever be believed again. Just stick to the order, be reasonable when necessary, don't make a big deal out of what your ex says, treat everything as matter of fact and go forward. If ex tells you something, then say "I'll see what I can do"

                      Comment


                      • All you can do is tell the truth in your reply, which is that your daughter doesn't experience any anxiety or night terrors while at your house, and that she seems happy and well adjusted.

                        Let your ex know that you are happy to arrange for neutral counselling for your daughter through your work benefits.

                        You could probably slip in a comment about your daughter possibly worrying that she would be torn away from her father for another six months, but I doubt that would accomplish anything.

                        Comment


                        • Originally posted by Straittohell View Post
                          All you can do is tell the truth in your reply, which is that your daughter doesn't experience any anxiety or night terrors while at your house, and that she seems happy and well adjusted.

                          Let your ex know that you are happy to arrange for neutral counselling for your daughter through your work benefits.

                          You could probably slip in a comment about your daughter possibly worrying that she would be torn away from her father for another six months, but I doubt that would accomplish anything.
                          I agree with most of this except for the part I bolded. Slipping in that comment will do nothing except inflame the situation. It is just a jab at the other parent.

                          Comment


                          • You could say she grows wings and flies, solves world hunger and spurts money out of her fingertips in your care. What she says happens is just her. Shes probably thinking by putting it in the book its gospel and everyone will believe it as such.

                            Just write down what happens "no nightmares, sleeps well, happy" etc and leave it at that. I would recommend the therapy but position it as you have awesome new benefits that may help her with some of the issues. And bonus? Another expert who can attest to D3's well being in your care!

                            Comment


                            • And about the transitions? She suggested just saying "you'll see daddy soon" and letting her know the night before. But D3 has been doing fine here. She seems to.like the predictability of knowing how many sleeps it will be. Ex looking for my opinion. I'm not sure why she's confused and anxious over this at her mom's but not here.
                              Last edited by LovingFather32; 12-17-2014, 09:48 PM.

                              Comment


                              • Because she isn't. Your ex is a liar.

                                Comment

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