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  • Originally posted by LovingFather32 View Post
    I'd love nothing more than for this to continue. But allegations not dropped? No mention of mediation? Sep agreement? Still wont give me her addy? Whats all that mean? Ill just continue to ride the wave as my jolly, friendly self ..
    For some couples mediation is not possible or even a good thing. Who care's if her allegations are not dropped - she can't prove them in court, so that's off of the charts.

    What use is it to you to have her addy? It means that she is still extremely paranoid and probably won't trust you until you can trust her. Will that ever happen - maybe with time?

    Comment


    • Originally posted by Janibel View Post
      Who care's if her allegations are not dropped - she can't prove them in court, so that's off of the charts. ?
      True. Kind of shows her intentions I suppose though.
      Originally posted by Janibel View Post
      It means that she is still extremely paranoid and probably won't trust you until you can trust her.
      I guess the question is what reason would she ever have to not trust me about? Didn't do anything. Besides call her on all her crap.

      Can I ever trust her? I have to. It will benefit D3. Ex has D3 a lot. I know ex loves her and would never hurt her. She apparently will hurt me though at any cost. Which may in turn affect D3 as a byproduct.
      Last edited by LovingFather32; 11-14-2014, 05:13 PM.

      Comment


      • I don't see the relevancy of some recent posts, with regard to EX being goody two shoes "all of a sudden", and LF32 having to smile and pretend to forgive and forget.

        LF32 is in the EYE of THE HURRICANE. It's nice, quiet and calm in the eye and he's forced into playing paddy cake with Goldilocks.

        Is the pain and suffering for LF32, for 8 months, being erased by a month of HAPPY HAPPY?

        Anybody see settlement? I think I read a prior post on settlement a few pages back, but it hasn't materialized.

        OP is still sticking with their REPLY and it's allegations.

        SO GAME ON.

        Thank goodness the OP is keeping the allegations alive and kicking, it means the last 8 months ARE NOT going to be erased by one month of good behaviour by Goldilocks.

        Goldilocks by not budging from allegations means the scrap is coming. LF32 can do nothing but defend himself against Goldilocks.

        What is sad for Goldilocks is her pretending currently to be a loving caring parent while maintaining the allegations. (tightrope)

        Is Goldilocks still "vengeful", high conflict, unreasonable, mean spirited?

        Goldilocks is only trying to prove "friendly parent" while keeping the allegations afloat. (impossible)

        She thinks she already has Sole Custody, which is opposite to LF32 who is putting a big smile on his face to try to get Sole Custody, with the allegations technically already dismissed.

        Goldilocks is hell bent and stubborn on her PLAN to get to Quebec. She cannot believe the MOTION (must be a mistake).....can we fight this.

        The upcoming SC/TMC is a formality (just win the endorsement)

        LAO scumbag lawyer is still on the case

        EVERYTHING will be gone over at Trial.

        Fantastic opportunity being wasted here for Goldilocks to walk away from the allegations and settle. Her going forward with this mess, guarantee's she's got mental issues and high conflict without LF32 doing a thing.

        http://www.leadershipcouncil.org/1/res/cust_myths.html

        Comment


        • Toronto - You are confusing the legal battle with the day to day of getting along in the best interest of a pre-schooler.

          Nobody is saying drop what happened all together. The false allegations MUST be put on the backburner for now if settlement is not reached.

          Behaviour of both parties has now entered a new phase since mom has seemingly changed her ways. LF must stop whinging and deliver as the parent he purports to be. OTHERWISE, it will all be twisted against him.

          In fact, if I were mom's counsel and I found him on here all day I would defo use that against him.

          Maybe mom has changed. More likely she has not but we are giving advice to LF on what HE can do to be seen in the best light.

          You know, outside of this forum most people don't give a rats ass what happened. Did workingdad's case ever make headlines anywhere except maybe this forum and the odd legal journal? NOPE!

          If you parse Canlii you will see it is far better to be the one that is accused and proven innocent than to be the aggressor.

          LF - You really honestly think mom's lawyer is going to easily give you the address now? If so, WOW! She made untrue statements and if she gives you the addy now you will automatically try to twist it as proof that she believes you are no longer a risk.

          She took a stance. Judge disagreed with her so far. She has to do what she can to salvage her position. Cmon, let it go. Mention it SMC/TMC and let the judge deal with it. Soooo much wasted effort in asking for it repeatedly.

          Comment


          • By all means one is free to spend all day writing on an internet forum about why the other parent is crap.

            For me, I would focus my energy on my own case (since I have ZERO control over the other parent) and on how I could be the very best parent to my child. You know things like, education, activities, family, stimulation according to the practices of Fraser Mustard and Charles Pascal. Things like that.

            Comment


            • Hey MR. T - I see you have your house up for sale

              'Godfather' Mansion On Sale For $3 Million

              I believe LF32 has a full time job working with disabled children and also works part-time as a professional musician. I don't think he has the time to spend full time on this forum. Like many of us who have gone through stressful times with separation/child custody, he has found solace and helpful advice from many people on this forum.

              If you have been following his posts for the past 10 months you would know how vicious and manipulative his ex is. (He can never 'rest easy' with that woman I'm afraid.)

              LF32 has been denied access from his daughter for a very long time. I think this weekend will only be the second time he has had her since his ordeal began. He is quite aware of the importance of putting together a solid parenting plan and has made admirable progress on many fronts of his child custody battle. Being highly educated, LF32 appreciates the importance of equipping himself with as much knowledge as he can. This has been evidenced by his attendance at parenting courses along with the extensive research he has personally conducted. In summary, he has done very well in delving into a "crash course" on parental abduction, child custody, Ontario Supreme Court Rules of Court, to name just a few.

              This isn't a case of a parent jostling to the finish line merely over child support payments. This is a father who truly loves his daughter, puts her best interests forward in spite of a very vindictive, manipulative ex who wants to erase him from his daughter's life.

              I commend LF32 for his perseverance and ability to maintain a mostly positive demeanour throughout this terrible time.

              Comment


              • I would add that it has only been 3 weeks since LF32 was in court.

                LF32 does not know where his daughter is when she is not with him. I know I would not be able to sleep peacefully unless I knew, with certainty, where my 3 yr old daughter was when she was not with me. Could you?

                If the mother behaves herself over the equal amount of time she spent trying to destroy LF32's life then I would maybe cut her the benefit of the doubt. Right now? Not a chance. As Mr. T has so correctly stated - Goldilocks has not made any legal move to settle therefore one must assume she is still intent on going for sole custody. It stands to reason that should she gain full custody she will most assuredly do everything within her power to alienate LF32 from daughter's life. She wants to destroy him. IT would be naive to think that a motion judge's ruling would change her thinking overnight.

                Comment


                • Originally posted by FaithandMorals View Post
                  LF must stop whinging
                  Nobody's whining. Would you want to know where your child was residing? Interesting tone.
                  Originally posted by FaithandMorals View Post
                  In fact, if I were mom's counsel and I found him on here all day I would defo use that against him.
                  Getting advice, focusing on legal issues and working to get D3 back must be frowned upon by the courts. Bringing this to court would not be an advantage to her. It would detail what she's done. Show my consistency throughout since the beginning. Especially my being settlement-focused and cooperative.
                  Originally posted by FaithandMorals View Post
                  If you parse Canlii you will see it is far better to be the one that is accused and proven innocent than to be the aggressor.
                  You are aware she's the aggressor with all the accusations in this case right? I agree with you here totally.
                  Originally posted by FaithandMorals View Post
                  LF - You really honestly think mom's lawyer is going to easily give you the address now? If so, WOW! She made untrue statements and if she gives you the addy now you will automatically try to twist it as proof that she believes you are no longer a risk.
                  I will try to twist nothing. I don't have to. Already proven Im not a risk. Just want to know where D3 is. You're really amplifying this in to something its not. Strange.
                  Originally posted by FaithandMorals View Post
                  Soooo much wasted effort in asking for it repeatedly.
                  I haven't asked for it yet. Once I just asked if she wanted me to pick D3 up at her place since D3 was sick and I thought it may be in her best interest to not drag her around to an exchange spot. She said she was headed that way anyways (towards exchange spot). I've only been asking advice about asking her. I don't impulsively make inquiries and demands. I sit on it and try figure out what will work for my case.

                  Thus far it's been .. as Mr. T says "playing paddycake". We're all smiles, friendly, warm and delightful with each other.

                  I'm doing nothing that could hurt my case right now. Chatting online about my case is not going to bury me. I've said it from the beginning. I don't even want to be in court. Ive been backed in to a corner and accused. I will always respect, promote and encourage ex's role in D3's life. Im settlement focused. I've proved myself. What she's done is wrong. Yes. But I'm moving on. To the subsequent stage of the case.
                  Last edited by LovingFather32; 11-14-2014, 11:10 PM.

                  Comment


                  • Originally posted by FaithandMorals View Post
                    By all means one is free to spend all day writing on an internet forum about why the other parent is crap.
                    .
                    Wrong. Parent has done a "crappy things". She is not crap. I don't say she's crap. Please don't put words in my mouth. I've called her a good parent to D3. I've also said that what she's done to me has an affect on D3. I work all day. I have a cell phone and breaks. Chill out.
                    Originally posted by FaithandMorals View Post
                    I would focus my energy on my own case (since I have ZERO control over the other parent) and on how I could be the very best parent to my child..
                    I have her in dance class (twinkle toes). Im researching schools. I teach her academics when she's here. We bake cookies, play house.. you name it. I'm in a "parenting after separation class" (Judge loved that and Im learning a lot)

                    On the weekends shes here we go to her nanny's. Tomorrow for instance is X-mas parade in the town we're going to. So before you make all of your unfounded assumptions because I type some things in a forum, you don't worry about my focus as a good father. I'm doing just fine in that category. Honestly, are we almost finished here? Why do I have a feeling its a multiple account user?

                    Comment


                    • Awesome night. D3 and I made bead necklaces (her fine motor skills are fantastic), watched a movie, painted our faces and a bunch of other awesome stuff. Feels so good to read her books again, cuddling up before bed. "I love you so much daddy" right before she goes to bed. I missed that so damn much. That little girl is my world. I just want a world free of conflict for her.

                      I want to thank those of you for the continued advice, support and well .. cyber friendships that have spawned. In their free time some people knit sweaters .. some play games, some read, some watch tv. Me? I discuss my case, educate myself and research ways to be a more productive father. The best father I can be. I can't wait until she starts "Twinkle Toes" dance class next wed. Going to be amazing.

                      Comment


                      • I'll settle for 2.9 million Arabian! LOL

                        Yes it's only 3 weeks since Motion, not much has changed

                        Like I wrote above, EX assumes she already has SOLE CUSTODY, the allegations are to drive that home

                        Custody is with Prejudice, so it's dangerous for any party to just assume they already have sole custody.

                        If we told LF32 to assume he already had sole custody and to go ahead and make allegations he'd call us nuts

                        He's just working on custody, EX isn't

                        This is why it has to made crystal clear to LF32 that if nothing is done by OP for settlement leading up to SC/TMC....then OP wants Trial

                        That's why some posters "aren't with the program", by saying smile and don't rock the boat as if the SC/TMC was a Trial it isn't it's the last step until a Trial.

                        The month of parties getting along when it's brought up at a Trial won't mean much.

                        Trial starts with allegations, child abduction, drinking and drugs, holes in walls , doors with hinges taken out, secret recordings.....then on the second day of Trial maybe the month of November will come up

                        This Trial will be long because EVERYTHING from start....AUG 2013 Action House to current will be there.

                        LAO scumbag lawyer has always wanted to win at Trial because he had no case and was going to build one as he went along. He did get stuff from a OCL that a fresh judge may perceive differently than the Motion Judge

                        Trials aren't Motions

                        LAO scumbag lawyer already has pleadings for why the Motion Judged erred on his findings

                        LAO scumbag lawyer is going to go over....by questioning LF32....every single tiny detail on stuff like a door hinge....until LF32's ear bleed in the witness box.

                        Lawyers that don't have to be worried about "how much is this going to cost" will spend hours on simple matters at Trial

                        Only a Judge can stop the beating. (where is this going) if your a self rep, if you have a lawyer, objections can be raised.

                        IT's crucial for Trial LF32 gets some evidence against the OP.

                        ALL the happy seals clapping away for LF32 to be a good boy for the month of November thinking that will win a Trial are wasting there time posting

                        Goldilocks is being coached by a LAO scumbag lawyer, to give LF32 nothing to use at a Trial.

                        nothing on jurisdiction......nothing on unfriendly parent......and all on caution on allegations

                        Lots of work in the future, even mock Trials to train up LF32. Luckily OP's case is based on allegations and primarily secret recordings

                        If LF32 gets past 2 days of questioning on what he did during the relationship and what he meant by a Facebook posting and this or that E-mail then he can go to work questioning EX to get allegations tossed for 2 more days.

                        Trials are all about preparation.

                        It starts at SC/TMC......getting your hands on ALL the secret recordings....questioning there validity...your rights to privacy....what if anything recordings have to do with this matter, cross examining goldilocks on how she set up her recordings ..previous case law.

                        Destroy OP recordings is a good first step or turn the recordings against OP is better

                        Comment


                        • Yeah the hard part LF32 living 2 lives. Lots of us did it. I remember my bead classes with my kids there was an actual store with tables setup for creating necklaces and bracelets where I once lived

                          my kids spent hours in there.....of course every bead and bracelet figurine cost mullah....but they loved it, and learned while having fun.

                          Of course you'll be challenged here LF32 for being a typical single mom on the internet when your kid is in bed.....dads have a higher standard to meet you know...LMAO

                          I think your letting your guard down personally, lulled to sleep by the posters that have never been in Court let alone a Trial.

                          They assume your up against the typical "parent" that although angry and wants custody ...is willingly to listen and doesn't have the money to lose in a scrap

                          NO poster is going to tell you how to deal with a free LAO scumbag lawyer and Goldilocks who are both hell bent on making you disappear.

                          I really got nothing for them but pity, they should read, STFU and learn from reading from the beginning.

                          That's why pains are takin to post in the open so other disaster cases can learn

                          give you credit LF32 for allowing your warts to be addressed here for others to see,

                          I bet thousands will be helped by the thread(s) in the years after your case is dust.
                          Last edited by MrToronto; 11-15-2014, 12:49 AM.

                          Comment


                          • Fact is I protected my kid and myself very well. It is also fact that I know quite a few peeps on here irl. It is also fact that I went through the process (like many posters) including trial.

                            I can also tell that you are an angry and bitter man. Read your own posts.

                            I would not even want you as my ex's lawyer. The venom you drip takes too much time to mop up.

                            There are men and women on this site that do not give a rats ass about gender; blink, WD, Tayken, Serene, Sots, Hammer, Mess, Pursuing, Rioe, stripes, dinky, Arabian, berner to name a few.

                            You do a disservice to LF and humanity in general. Telling a parent in a custody battle that attack is the only way forward is quite frankly, shit advice. Hey, the upside is LF did not pay for the advice.

                            I stand by my advice that LF should reflect on where he is now.

                            Comment


                            • Originally posted by FaithandMorals View Post
                              I can also tell that you are an angry and bitter man. Read your own posts.

                              I would not even want you as my ex's lawyer. The venom you drip takes too much time to mop up.

                              There are men and women on this site that do not give a rats ass about gender; blink, WD, Tayken, Serene, Sots, Hammer, Mess, Pursuing, Rioe, stripes, dinky, Arabian, berner to name a few.

                              You do a disservice to LF and humanity in general. Telling a parent in a custody battle that attack is the only way forward is quite frankly, shit advice. Hey, the upside is LF did not pay for the advice.

                              I stand by my advice that LF should reflect on where he is now.
                              You are wasting your breath. mrt is conflict orientated. That is all he cares about, keeping the conflict going. Win at all costs, make people pay. He doesn't realize that not everyone is so hell bent on revenge. He hasn't moved on from his own court experiences yet it seems and is making this more personal then it should be. Maybe because (if I remember correctly) he lost against his ex that now he wants a woman, any woman to pay for that. So sad really.

                              Lf32, I think, is smart enough to see that. I also think he will have his guard up (as he should until there is a history of good behaviour from ex)but is hoping that the new relationship with his ex is a more permanent thing. Yes she did a very bad and terrible thing but maybe now (after getting ass handed to her in court) she realizes that her way wasn't going to work. She thought she was a slam dunk but she didn't even hit the net when it was in court.
                              Last edited by standing on the sidelines; 11-15-2014, 07:20 AM.

                              Comment


                              • Up and atem early this morning. I have chocolate chip pancakes, eggs and sausages on the go. I love the feeling I get knowing D3 will be up soon. I have an awesome arts and crafts project prepared for after breakfast.

                                One thing. I get there are many different opinions here. I see Mr. T's posts okay I get it. Many don't agree with him. Many don't comprehend his mode of thinking.

                                If you disagree with what he is saying, please politely state why and provide your own opinion. This isn't the place to be calling people angry, bitter, venomous or attempting to blindly delve in to his past. He is who he is. Take the good with the not-so-good.

                                I think Mr. T may simply be saying "collect this SC endorsement .. keep trying to settle .. send mediation requests, etc and be prepared for trial in case that's where its heading.

                                I will tell you that Mr. T has helped me construct beautiful "access denial charts", etc. for court. FB, another amazing user on this site was a poster that helped me immensely as well. FB saw that Mr. T had worthy, valuable information and realized that it overshadowed some of his darker stuff.

                                I do want to keep on track here and stay away from the little digs. If one has issue, take it up in PM land. I don't want this to be a battleground.

                                Faith&M:

                                I found it funny that you PM me a few days ago saying you've been following my posts for a long time and, give some good advice on health and education, then come on here calling me whiney, that Im on here too much, that you'd use this forum against me in court., etc. I believe Arabian's post following yours summed it up.

                                It's disheartening to know that you would use this against me in court .. then write stuff like "He's on here all day saying how crappy the other parent is".

                                Sure seems like if this went to court you'd want messages like that to be read. To be clear. I've never said she was a crappy parent to D3. Just crappy what she's done to me .. which may have affected D3 somewhat.

                                Like Arabian pointed out .. I'm here for ideas and advice to help advance my case. I work on the school board and in group homes. Im not on here all day. I have a cell phone and breaks.

                                Like SOTS said .. ex may have learned something in court. But allegations are still floating. No talks of settlement yet. So I'm tiptoeing around the process at the moment, careful not to make any wrong moves.

                                I haven't even asked for her address yet. I've done nothing but cooperate. It seems presumed that Im being high conflict somehow. That's completely false.

                                Any posters are free o go from the beginning to get the full story of who the aggressor has been and who the calm, cooperative person has been. I haven't changed that stance .. hope that's recognized.
                                Last edited by LovingFather32; 11-15-2014, 08:37 AM.

                                Comment

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