Looking for some input here... the more this sits with me the more it is bothering me and doesn’t seem “right”
At our Settlement Conference the judge gave ex a 30 day disclosure order for specific employment info and 12 months of bank statements- he has been saying heÂ’s been unemployed for a year when he really wasnÂ’t. He even admitted to the judge at the SC that he did in fact work at the place I was requesting disclosure from.
I then asked the judge if we could schedule a motion for CS and arrears for a date after the 30 day deadline (neither of us have brought a single motion yet, and everything is settled on in a final order except for CS and arrears). He said he wasnÂ’t scheduling it, and I would need to see the clerks to schedule one.
At some point my exÂ’s lawyer stood up and indicated that her client wants to take our daughter on an out of country vacation (all inclusive week long Caribbean vacation to be exact) and that he needs me to apply for our childÂ’s long form birth certificate in order to apply for the passport. IÂ’m not sure why she felt the need to mention this- I told my ex IN WRITING that I had no problem providing written consent for this, and would have the documents to him by the end of this month. I also had this in my most recent offer to Settle. I stood up and told the judge that this has never been an issue and that I would have it to him in the next couple weeks. Judge nodded and continued on.
Then I get the endorsement sheet from one of the clerks after we’re all finished. It reads “Applicant May bring a motion for child support after June 15/19 and only once she provides the Resp with the child’s birth certificate “
- Issue 1: June 15 is more than a whole MONTH after the exÂ’s 30 day disclosure deadline. Our daughter has gone without CS from my ex from July 2017-December 2018, and a minimal amount (less than min wage guideline) since January 2019
- Issue 2: I have never and will never use our child’s passport and ability to experience a different country as “leverage” against my ex. The way the endorsement reads, it looks like I am being unreasonable and not providing my ex with our child’s proper documentation. And I don’t want a future judge thinking that. Would it not have made more sense to put something about the birth certificate in our final order, not in the endorsement and as a condition for me to seek CS??
Issue 3: In my mind (and I am pretty sure within family law as well), child support and ensuring that the child is properly supported and taken care of are one of the top priorities. This judge has now made our daughterÂ’s child support (for which she has received nothing- and I mean nothing- for 1.5 years, and in the last few months a VERY small amount) tied to a condition that my ex receive documentation to take her on a vacation (in OCTOBER) while he is currently owing thousands of dollars.
Like I said, I planned on providing this documentation as soon as I receive it within the next few weeks anyways, so itÂ’s not actually an issue. Its more the principal of the whole thing that really bothers me. Plus, I basically have to twiddle my thumbs and wait over a month after the disclosure deadline before I can file for child support?!?
What the heck?!? Is this the norm and IÂ’m just getting upset over nothing? Or is this not right??
At our Settlement Conference the judge gave ex a 30 day disclosure order for specific employment info and 12 months of bank statements- he has been saying heÂ’s been unemployed for a year when he really wasnÂ’t. He even admitted to the judge at the SC that he did in fact work at the place I was requesting disclosure from.
I then asked the judge if we could schedule a motion for CS and arrears for a date after the 30 day deadline (neither of us have brought a single motion yet, and everything is settled on in a final order except for CS and arrears). He said he wasnÂ’t scheduling it, and I would need to see the clerks to schedule one.
At some point my exÂ’s lawyer stood up and indicated that her client wants to take our daughter on an out of country vacation (all inclusive week long Caribbean vacation to be exact) and that he needs me to apply for our childÂ’s long form birth certificate in order to apply for the passport. IÂ’m not sure why she felt the need to mention this- I told my ex IN WRITING that I had no problem providing written consent for this, and would have the documents to him by the end of this month. I also had this in my most recent offer to Settle. I stood up and told the judge that this has never been an issue and that I would have it to him in the next couple weeks. Judge nodded and continued on.
Then I get the endorsement sheet from one of the clerks after we’re all finished. It reads “Applicant May bring a motion for child support after June 15/19 and only once she provides the Resp with the child’s birth certificate “
- Issue 1: June 15 is more than a whole MONTH after the exÂ’s 30 day disclosure deadline. Our daughter has gone without CS from my ex from July 2017-December 2018, and a minimal amount (less than min wage guideline) since January 2019
- Issue 2: I have never and will never use our child’s passport and ability to experience a different country as “leverage” against my ex. The way the endorsement reads, it looks like I am being unreasonable and not providing my ex with our child’s proper documentation. And I don’t want a future judge thinking that. Would it not have made more sense to put something about the birth certificate in our final order, not in the endorsement and as a condition for me to seek CS??
Issue 3: In my mind (and I am pretty sure within family law as well), child support and ensuring that the child is properly supported and taken care of are one of the top priorities. This judge has now made our daughterÂ’s child support (for which she has received nothing- and I mean nothing- for 1.5 years, and in the last few months a VERY small amount) tied to a condition that my ex receive documentation to take her on a vacation (in OCTOBER) while he is currently owing thousands of dollars.
Like I said, I planned on providing this documentation as soon as I receive it within the next few weeks anyways, so itÂ’s not actually an issue. Its more the principal of the whole thing that really bothers me. Plus, I basically have to twiddle my thumbs and wait over a month after the disclosure deadline before I can file for child support?!?
What the heck?!? Is this the norm and IÂ’m just getting upset over nothing? Or is this not right??
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