I discovered this old post and am resurrecting it for myself and others dealing with High Conflict Parent issues - namely my ex. I will assume the mediation service is a court appointed mediator. My experience with mediation was relatively positive, although my ex refused to sign the final SA.
Now heading to a case conference, my lawyer has suggested a court appointed mediator is a positive approach towards effective co-parenting of our two kids. My ex stands firm in her ways, however I realize we are parents to ours kids for many years to come, so, we must negotiate and take a mature, responsible approach in order to effectively co-parent.
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I discovered recently that our local mediation service will provide a mediator to work as a 'coach' where the other refuses to come (back) to the table. This is an excellent service and I wish I had discovered this years ago. I meet weekly with my coach. We review how the parenting process has gone during the previous week, the effects of those actions/decisions/fights on the children, and talk about how I could have dealt with my ex differently. We also plan strategy -- how I can influence my ex to be responsible, mature and cooperative. Since mediators understand the legal process as well, and have great experience with warring parents, they are in a position to provide excellent strategic advice.
My coach tells me it is not infrequent for the other parent to return to the table -- they of course don't like these 'professional' discussions about their kids without also having input. And a 'coach' is not prevented from giving evidence in court -- as a coach, there is no requirement of impartiality. This too worries the other parent and her lawyer.
__________________________________________________ _____________
Now heading to a case conference, my lawyer has suggested a court appointed mediator is a positive approach towards effective co-parenting of our two kids. My ex stands firm in her ways, however I realize we are parents to ours kids for many years to come, so, we must negotiate and take a mature, responsible approach in order to effectively co-parent.
__________________________________________________ _________
I discovered recently that our local mediation service will provide a mediator to work as a 'coach' where the other refuses to come (back) to the table. This is an excellent service and I wish I had discovered this years ago. I meet weekly with my coach. We review how the parenting process has gone during the previous week, the effects of those actions/decisions/fights on the children, and talk about how I could have dealt with my ex differently. We also plan strategy -- how I can influence my ex to be responsible, mature and cooperative. Since mediators understand the legal process as well, and have great experience with warring parents, they are in a position to provide excellent strategic advice.
My coach tells me it is not infrequent for the other parent to return to the table -- they of course don't like these 'professional' discussions about their kids without also having input. And a 'coach' is not prevented from giving evidence in court -- as a coach, there is no requirement of impartiality. This too worries the other parent and her lawyer.
__________________________________________________ _____________
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