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Parenting Issues This forum is for discussing any of the parenting issues involved in your divorce, including parenting of step-children.

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  #1  
Old 02-16-2020, 08:23 AM
UnderPressure UnderPressure is offline
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Smile Coparenting app experience

Hello,


As I approach separation and am already experiencing scheduling conflict I am researching app platforms to use with my spouse. I would appreciate any feedback or things learned by those of you who are using these platforms daily/weekly.


I have read about Our Family Wizard, Coparently and 2Houses. Are there others I should investigate? Is there one that is thought of as the best or very good? Based on your experience is there one solution you would choose now or any you would avoid and why?


I appreciate your time and advice. I am planning to purchase, configure and roll out a solution in the next week to facilitate scheduling and communication even while we are all residing together.
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  #2  
Old 02-17-2020, 09:00 PM
Abba435 Abba435 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by UnderPressure View Post
Hello,


As I approach separation and am already experiencing scheduling conflict I am researching app platforms to use with my spouse. I would appreciate any feedback or things learned by those of you who are using these platforms daily/weekly.


I have read about Our Family Wizard, Coparently and 2Houses. Are there others I should investigate? Is there one that is thought of as the best or very good? Based on your experience is there one solution you would choose now or any you would avoid and why?


I appreciate your time and advice. I am planning to purchase, configure and roll out a solution in the next week to facilitate scheduling and communication even while we are all residing together.
OFW is brilliant. get it in writing that you will use it.
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Old 02-17-2020, 10:59 PM
UnderPressure UnderPressure is offline
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I will do that thank you. I was thinking of introducing it ahead of time but I would rather have the mediator put it forward. Much more likely to work that way.
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  #4  
Old 02-18-2020, 12:31 AM
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Janus Janus is offline
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Janus will become famous soon enoughJanus will become famous soon enough
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Communication Platform: gmail

Free, easy to use, effective.

scheduling platform: separation agreement

Don't leave any room for negotiation in the agreement. Split up the summers NOW. Split up Christmas NOW. Never talk to your ex again unless you feel like it.

Seriously, I don't get the point of OFW. Paying for email is silly.
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Old 02-18-2020, 12:46 AM
UnderPressure UnderPressure is offline
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The price is insignificant to me.

It handles a whole lot more than email including secure document storage (kidís records) and calendaring that is simple and visual. It may be possible to work out similar systems using email and other services but why would I bother when this has everything built for purpose in one app?

Scheduling and organized communication is not my strength so the extra structure and tools will be well worth it from what I see so far.

I will take your advice and include everything I can think of in the agreement. I have been reading this forum, making notes and asking questions so I can be sure to nail down as much as possible.


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Old 02-18-2020, 09:30 AM
Abba435 Abba435 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by UnderPressure View Post
The price is insignificant to me.

It handles a whole lot more than email including secure document storage (kidís records) and calendaring that is simple and visual. It may be possible to work out similar systems using email and other services but why would I bother when this has everything built for purpose in one app?

Scheduling and organized communication is not my strength so the extra structure and tools will be well worth it from what I see so far.

I will take your advice and include everything I can think of in the agreement. I have been reading this forum, making notes and asking questions so I can be sure to nail down as much as possible.


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An iron clad agreement may seem like the answer but unless both parents are committed to peace and compliance it is just a piece of paper. Courts will not enforce terms unless there are police enforcement provisions specifically. Like any contract it is the intent that matters. Been there, still trying to get the other parent to colour in the lines. My biggest mistake was thinking conflict would end after divorce with a strong agreement. And the other parent is a family therapist. 8 years laters back in court even with a very detailed agreement with all the bases covered. It truly takes two.
That said, get it as detailed and as reasonable as possible.
My post on special occasions might help you.
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Old 02-19-2020, 12:31 PM
beentheredonethis beentheredonethis is offline
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I couldn't agree more with Abba and Janus
I use a shared calendar, and email, however, the other person needs to want to work with you.
I have an agreement that says pick up is 5pm, drop off is 8. The kids are picked up (after he communicates with them, not me) at around 415-430 and dropped off after 8. This is especially prevalent on weekends, when the kids won't see me for 5 days.
Thinking people can work together as adults is one thing, actually expecting it to happen is different.
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Old 02-19-2020, 07:02 PM
UnderPressure UnderPressure is offline
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Part of this is putting things in a walled garden so we both have the option to limit communication otherwise. I don't need that at this point but she may now or either of us later on. I am no fan of GMail and I use it for work and personal (different accounts) so I would rather the app.


Why both pickup and drop off? I was thinking pickup by the parent who is beginning their time makes the most sense, as that parent will be motivated to be punctual. When do you do pick up vs. drop off?


Thank you so much for sharing your experience and advice.
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  #9  
Old 02-20-2020, 09:57 AM
beentheredonethis beentheredonethis is offline
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I don't do either - he moved 45 minutes away, therefore he is responsible for both.
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Old 02-20-2020, 01:46 PM
dad2bandm dad2bandm is offline
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If I was to use one, Our Family Wizard seems the best. They price it as such.

An app/site like OFW does simplify some things when it comes to *high/conflict parents*. Everything is in the one spot...messages, receipts, calendar/schedule changes.

"I didn't get your email! You never notified me".
Check OFW.

"It's my weekend with kids!"
Check OFW - you agreed to schedule change.

"I need child's report card!"
Check OFW - it's uploaded for you.


I use email though for now. Other parent ignores communications anyway and refuses something like OFW. Always has excuses when they do actually respond. I use ReadNotify.com to strictly help with tracking important email communications, so I know when/if she read them.

Our Family Wizard would be much easier.

Ex always has "email issues". Funny, ReadNotify tells me she got message just fine. She never had email issues when she was collecting email money transfers from me either.
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