Although I am appealing it, I have been turned down for legal aid. I don't expect to actually be able to get legal aid, so *shrugs* I'm preparing for self-representation.
The issues are:
A) custody and visitation of the five children. I have had de facto custody since Nov. 08 and although the option was made available to my ex to see and/or speak to the children through Children's Aid, he has made no move to do so. Neither has any of his family. Given things that have either happened or been found, I want supervised visitation, no overnights. The children have not suffered for lack of their father being here, to be honest. Quite the opposite.
B) Child support. I'm willing to settle for what he is able to pay rather then insisting upon table amounts, as long as it's an honest effort. He is on ODSP and I understand the limited income. But I don't feel he should be permitted to go about life without having some responsibility towards the children.
C) Division of assets. There is little that was bought by us together during our common-law relationship (Mar. 95 - Sept. 07) or the marriage itself (Sept. 07 - Nov. 08). Most was given by my parents..living room and bedroom furniture, miscellaneous things like dishes, cookware. In reality, what was bought during the marriage was a dining set ($80), a computer
($200), the bunkbeds for the two oldest children (over a thousand) and some cast iron cookware which didn't even top 50 dollars. There is also a van which was in his name, but in writing, he gifted it to me expressly, along with the ownership that was in his name. The only item bought during the marriage was the kitchen set.
D) Debt. I am in it up to my eyeballs with credit cards. I have three in my name. One is now in collections (account cancelled by me). One is at a manageable level and the other is maxed out and not being used..I'm just doing my best to pay something on it each month. Although he never had any access to these accounts through a courtesy card, etc, some of the debt is his, I feel. The one that is now in collections was used to pay for the wedding and things like groceries and things that he wanted. It wasn't just for me. The first of the three accounts was started in 2004 or 2005..I do have the records, just a bad memory.
In a nutshell..where do I start?!
We are not able to sit down together to figure this out because right now he is still in the hospital from his suicide attempt in April and there is a no contact order in place restricting him from speaking to me or contacting me in any way except through the Children's Aid and then only to speak to or see the children.
His personal belongings (clothing, etc) are finally being picked up tomorrow, in spite of being ready since the middle of March, by his family. As much as I don't like it, the police are involved in this because they say I will cause trouble and I say that they will. I have no reason to cause trouble..I need his things out of the garage, but if they wish to think that way, that's their choice. The children will be at my mothers for the day, just in case.
The issue of the divorce itself..I simply want an uncontested divorce after everything is settled. I don't want it to be dragged out, etc.
So I'm trying to figure out where to start.
Thanks,
Mona
The issues are:
A) custody and visitation of the five children. I have had de facto custody since Nov. 08 and although the option was made available to my ex to see and/or speak to the children through Children's Aid, he has made no move to do so. Neither has any of his family. Given things that have either happened or been found, I want supervised visitation, no overnights. The children have not suffered for lack of their father being here, to be honest. Quite the opposite.
B) Child support. I'm willing to settle for what he is able to pay rather then insisting upon table amounts, as long as it's an honest effort. He is on ODSP and I understand the limited income. But I don't feel he should be permitted to go about life without having some responsibility towards the children.
C) Division of assets. There is little that was bought by us together during our common-law relationship (Mar. 95 - Sept. 07) or the marriage itself (Sept. 07 - Nov. 08). Most was given by my parents..living room and bedroom furniture, miscellaneous things like dishes, cookware. In reality, what was bought during the marriage was a dining set ($80), a computer
($200), the bunkbeds for the two oldest children (over a thousand) and some cast iron cookware which didn't even top 50 dollars. There is also a van which was in his name, but in writing, he gifted it to me expressly, along with the ownership that was in his name. The only item bought during the marriage was the kitchen set.
D) Debt. I am in it up to my eyeballs with credit cards. I have three in my name. One is now in collections (account cancelled by me). One is at a manageable level and the other is maxed out and not being used..I'm just doing my best to pay something on it each month. Although he never had any access to these accounts through a courtesy card, etc, some of the debt is his, I feel. The one that is now in collections was used to pay for the wedding and things like groceries and things that he wanted. It wasn't just for me. The first of the three accounts was started in 2004 or 2005..I do have the records, just a bad memory.
In a nutshell..where do I start?!
We are not able to sit down together to figure this out because right now he is still in the hospital from his suicide attempt in April and there is a no contact order in place restricting him from speaking to me or contacting me in any way except through the Children's Aid and then only to speak to or see the children.
His personal belongings (clothing, etc) are finally being picked up tomorrow, in spite of being ready since the middle of March, by his family. As much as I don't like it, the police are involved in this because they say I will cause trouble and I say that they will. I have no reason to cause trouble..I need his things out of the garage, but if they wish to think that way, that's their choice. The children will be at my mothers for the day, just in case.
The issue of the divorce itself..I simply want an uncontested divorce after everything is settled. I don't want it to be dragged out, etc.
So I'm trying to figure out where to start.
Thanks,
Mona
Comment