Wish I got here earlier in the year, just separated in April and going through the process, blended family , son 10 stepdaughter 13. We tried mutual agreement , but couldn't happen fast enough for her. Now its going through the court process which is a learning curve. I do find this to be stressfull and emotional . What was once , is no more. I am looking forward to the other side but don't feel it will be equal. I am nervous and skeptical about the court process. Putting my fait and future in the hands of a failed court system from my perspective, does not bo well with me. Especially since the ex is doing all she can to show no income. I have been able to see my son 3 days a week , but stepdaughter is always busy or does not want to go . I really hope the facts show up in court. Her biggest fight right now is she will not budge on her having full custody / guardianship . But as I type this , we have shared , court decision not made yet and I don't plan on giving anything up . But it does boil down to $$$, I am sure she would be more likely to negotiate the rest if I gave it up . But don't want to give up on any rights. that's just the tip of what I am in .. So hello, thankyou , from B.C. Yep we are a province in a state of emergency again due to wildfires !
Announcement
Collapse
No announcement yet.
Howdy
Collapse
X
-
Originally posted by Grenade View PostI have been able to see my son 3 days a week , but stepdaughter is always busy or does not want to go. But as I type this , we have shared
Especially since the ex is doing all she can to show no income.
-
Her income was a good portion cash, and we were divided , an actual amount has yet to be determined, She has not yet provided any information on her financial statement , other than claiming she is on Ei, and as far as having the kid/kids 50 % she will not agree to this. In fact she is pulling away and reducing my time , I have had weekends and the days during the week but she is now restricting this ,claiming my son doesn't want to . I did do the form and it does indicate alienation, I consulted with my lawyer and she says this is a common tactic used . I am not sure what to do and its tearing me up.
Comment
-
Originally posted by Grenade View PostI have had weekends and the days during the week but she is now restricting this ,claiming my son doesn't want to.
I did do the form and it does indicate alienation
How much time have you been actually getting the last couple of weeks? It sounds like it is less than the "3 days a week" you first implied.
Originally posted by Grenade View PostHer income was a good portion cash, and we were divided , an actual amount has yet to be determined, She has not yet provided any information on her financial statement , other than claiming she is on Ei
I am not sure what to do and its tearing me up.
Comment
-
Currently getting 2 overnight mid week and weekends. There has been no set schedule, we have been modifying as we go , due to everyones schedule. Your replies are the truth and I am lacking confidence in disputing. Lack of knowledge , and overwhelmed. My lawyer wants another consult and her only reply was this is a tactic used and we must push back. I am in court on sept 11. i wasn't prepared for this fight, But I AM going to fight. Thank you . This is why i am here.
Comment
-
I have been requesting it but she is either busy babysitting , or already had plans, she is close to 14, and not sure how to approach this. But I have only been requesting it with step daughter . I would like her to be apart of it all but am not going to force her to do something unwantingly, she has had some recent contact with her real father but not sure where that is going, if anywhere.
Comment
-
Originally posted by Grenade View PostCurrently getting 2 overnight mid week and weekends.
There has been no set schedule, we have been modifying as we go , due to everyones schedule.
I am in court on sept 11.
Have you proposed a schedule? If not, why not? Make an offer to settle parenting time and send it... like... today.
Comment
-
well the last 2 weeks , on calendar , 5-19 I have had him 5 days, only because they were out of town for 7 days at a 4h show and sale. I did attend 2 part days watching the events for both kids, 1 day was overnight mid week, I have proposed a few schedules and she wont agree to any long term , so I have asked to meet and get some short term , if when a person asks for specific days and is declined for no reason how do you go about getting those days ? Demand ? And if denied then what ? This is the first resistance I have met , we have just been texting week, by week so far. But I want more of a plan and she isn't willing to negotiate on anything, she wants it left to the lawyers and judges, on everything but I disagree and want a schedule.
Comment
-
5/14 is under 40%, which means full table CS automatically.
What kind of schedule are you seeking? Are you familiar with the 5522 schedule? Week about? Offer a plan and let her say what is wrong with the plan. It is difficult to argue against a 5522 when the other parent is already hovering near 40%, but you have to do it fast.
Comment
-
You say you have a lawyer so I don't get why she isn't telling you this, but it's simple:
1) Begin drafting a settlement offer. Make it as comprehensive as possible and include a bulletproof (unambiguous) parenting plan. Take your time with this and don't show it to ex without first running it by your lawyer. You need to know what you want before you even begin to negotiate anything.
2) Fill out your Financial Statement (Form F8). Make sure it doesn't show that you have spare money for the ex to take. Again, don't necessarily show it to ex.
3) This and following steps assume you have been served with a Notice of Family Claim. Schedule a Judicial Case Conference (JCC) ASAP; I'd say even if your settlement offer is not yet crystal clear and comprehensive (maybe you can agree on some of the issues).
4) Be careful what you agree to at the JCC. If you go into it without a lawyer, be 10x as careful.
5) Propose 40% or more for your parenting plan at the JCC. If she agrees to it great, you need to do one of the following:
(i) make a court application for an interim order to get the 40%, or
(ii) go to summary trial, or
(iii) go to full trial.
(i) is the fastest, but you may have to go through (ii) and/or (iii) in addition to it and that will cost you legal fees. If you don't do (i) she will bleed you dry with CS on the long road to trial.
Comment
-
Tried doing the settlement offer in the beginning No Go . I kept trying to see what the biggest issue was . She doesn't want to negotiate or tell me what she wants. I have tried several offers of which I thought were fair . But without feedback its a guessing game. She wants to leave it up to the system and its saddening. We are going to trial! I have suggested a parenting arrangement 50/50 many options for this ,Still have no response as to why it wouldn't work ! Sept 11, will be first hearing !
Comment
Comment