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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #11  
Old 10-11-2019, 08:30 PM
Helpmyspouse Helpmyspouse is offline
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Poster said mom works every weekend. So how is it possible that if he goes to court his current access could be changed to every other weekend. Mom is not available to take the child on weekends.
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  #12  
Old 10-12-2019, 11:53 AM
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Janus Janus is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Helpmyspouse View Post
Poster said mom works every weekend. So how is it possible that if he goes to court his current access could be changed to every other weekend. Mom is not available to take the child on weekends.
I worked during the week and had custody of preschool kids during that time. I did that for years. Working and custody are not mutually exclusive situations.

Things change. Maybe once mom starts getting table CS she will be able to work less. Or maybe she will consider working during the week. Or maybe she will considering hiring a babysitter (which OP would have to pay a portion of, even if it was during time that he would be happy to have the kid).
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  #13  
Old 10-12-2019, 10:21 PM
calvinfive calvinfive is offline
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Not sure if providing a room for your child will be a material change, but the age and increase school work might be. Sunday overnights will allow for smoother transitions to school and enable you to establish more consistent routines and better assist child to prepare for school.

If she works every weekend and that is the status quo, then based on Janus's own past arguments of the difficult burdens of changing Status quo held by mothers - she wouldn't stand a chance. In this case however, he has indicated the status quo is meaningless and that mom can take every other weekend from you. I disagree with Janus here. It will be next to impossible for mom to get every other weekend without a material change, and a finding that it will be in child's best interests. Like come on, she's never displayed an interest in spending weekend time with the child and even "dumps" child on you on some of her own long weekends. She's clearly always wanted the weekends all to her self.

Mom won't success in taking every other weekend from you to put child in daycare. That won't happen. Maybe if you were alienating the child from her. She's the one that walked away from weekends with the child - for the last 5 years and up until the discussion of child support came up.

I also disagree with Janus about child support. As you indicated you have child for at least 40% off the time, you can come to whatever terms you want to come to an agreement with your ex as it is shared custody. My agreement with ex, is that there is no child support because of shared custody. Probably, you are paying higher than table amounts in shared custody. I also assume ex makes equal to or more than you, and she probably is the one that should be paying you child support.

Are you receiving any child tax benefits? You are also entitled to that since you have 40% access

As a best approach strategy, I agree with Janus that you should move closer. That will guarantee you Mondays. If mom tries to take every other weekend, then you say fine, you can have every other weekend, but I will get a few days every other week - which will put you guys at a week about arrangement - or you could just suggest to go back to 2-2-5-5.

Put all your time, energy, and efforts into finding a place as close as to your child as possible. Child tax benefits combined with a correct child support amount under shared custody should really help with rent.
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  #14  
Old 10-12-2019, 10:23 PM
calvinfive calvinfive is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Janus View Post
Working and custody are not mutually exclusive situations.
Custody and access are two separate issues.
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