I find a few things about how the situation went down not right, and you need to go to court to get them corrected. From what you have said, it seems you either had a bad lawyer who did not do his job and was incompetent, or there are lots of other issues at hand that you have not explained.
Support is a simple math calculation. There is no negotiation involved. If you do not know what his latest income is, then you need to ask for financial disclosure. If he left for 5 years and just showed up again, then you need to get him to account for those 5 years of non payment. The courts do not look kindly upon that, and will want to correct that. Child support is something that you can't negotiate away. It is not your money, it is the children's. You get to spend it as you see fit, as the government trusts that the money will go towards such things as food, shelter , and clothing.
If the kids only see him once in a while, then you merely need to put your emotions aside for those few times, and know that it will not last forever. If he is as you claim, then he will give up, or the kids will give up. If it is a real problem, then you can go to court and get an order to change it.
You mentioned a bit about abuse, and claim the kids remember it now. From what little you had said early on, I am still wondering about all your story. Are the kids truly remembering, or are they remembering what you tell them? My kids have told me stories that their mother told them, but problem is they never happened. I hope you don't take my comment the wrong way, because I do really have sympathy for abuse victims, but I have found that many vindictive women make the abuse claim, when in fact they were the abusers.
Support is a simple math calculation. There is no negotiation involved. If you do not know what his latest income is, then you need to ask for financial disclosure. If he left for 5 years and just showed up again, then you need to get him to account for those 5 years of non payment. The courts do not look kindly upon that, and will want to correct that. Child support is something that you can't negotiate away. It is not your money, it is the children's. You get to spend it as you see fit, as the government trusts that the money will go towards such things as food, shelter , and clothing.
If the kids only see him once in a while, then you merely need to put your emotions aside for those few times, and know that it will not last forever. If he is as you claim, then he will give up, or the kids will give up. If it is a real problem, then you can go to court and get an order to change it.
You mentioned a bit about abuse, and claim the kids remember it now. From what little you had said early on, I am still wondering about all your story. Are the kids truly remembering, or are they remembering what you tell them? My kids have told me stories that their mother told them, but problem is they never happened. I hope you don't take my comment the wrong way, because I do really have sympathy for abuse victims, but I have found that many vindictive women make the abuse claim, when in fact they were the abusers.
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