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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #1  
Old 02-10-2010, 10:23 PM
nick2009 nick2009 is offline
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Default child access + temporary court order + frustration

Hi, Guys,

I and EX reached a temporary court order on Jan. 27, 2010 about the child access during the frist case conference at the superior court of justice.

Then I followed the order on Jan. 30 (Saterday) to pick up my daughter (11 yr) at her Saturday school. However, my daughter did not show up. I called EX and EX said that my daughter did not go to school because she did not want to see me. I said that I want to talk to my daughter. EX said that she is not responsible for calling my daughter to pick the phone or I have to pay EX money for the calling my daughter.

On Feb 6 (another Saterday), my daughter did show up after finishing her Saturday school, but my daughter said she does not want to talk to me and then EX come and pick her up and drive away.

Since the last July 2009, I just access my daughter once on Jan 4, 2010 Monday afternoon. My daughter called on Jan.3, 2010 Sunday and she missed me and wanted me to visit her because her mom went to grocery and not at home. Somehow we decided that the next day Monday afternoon 4:30 - 5:00 we could meet for half an hour at her room. And we did and I brought Chrismas present to her. My daughter told me that EX does not want my daugher to contact me by using EX phone, that basically block the channel between my daughter and me.

Really do not know how to deal with it. too much frustration!

Is there proper legal procedure to handle it.

Thank you
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Old 02-10-2010, 10:34 PM
billiechic billiechic is offline
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first your ex cannot request payment so you can see your daughter. That is ridiculous.

How old is your daughter? did she say why she didn't want to see you? How did she act when you saw her last?

It is wrong for her to prevent her from seeing you, or to influence her decision. Because your daughter first called when mom was not home there is a reason to suspect that she is being influenced (maybe mom won't let her call you)

Legally you need to have the order enforced. It means a trip back to court. Call your lawyer.
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Old 02-11-2010, 11:23 PM
nick2009 nick2009 is offline
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Thank you billiechic

My daughter is 11 year's old. She did not tell me why she did not want to see me. But she does not want me call her, because her mom can check up all the call-in phone number. She simply does not want her mom to know that I had ever called in. In my interpretation, EX does not want any contact between my daughter and me.

Now, there is dilemma for me. the right way is to let the court intervene this situation. But on the other hand, I have to let everyone know that my daughter and me met once on Jan.4 2010, probably causing EX gives my daughter hard time. this is my most concern. The similar situation happened in Jan and Feb of 2008, we met each other without EX's notice. However a friend of my daughter leaked the secret to EX. EX knows how much i love that little girl. so EX tried to use it to punish me and cause me pain.

I am wondering what is the right procedure to make the court order enforced. Because I now represent myself (run out of money) since the first case conference, so, I need someone give me some direction about how to deal with it and how to protect the interest of my daughter.

Thank you very much
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Old 02-12-2010, 09:50 AM
billiechic billiechic is offline
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THat is Parental Alienation. Your daughter needs you and she wants to see you. Talk to a lawyer today! There are cases where CPs have lost custody for doing this. I can't see the court NOT enforcing access to you.
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Old 02-12-2010, 09:50 AM
billiechic billiechic is offline
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Go see the Family Law Infromation Centre (FLIC) at the court. They can tell you what to do.
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Old 02-12-2010, 08:41 PM
nick2009 nick2009 is offline
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Thank you billiechic,

Thank you very much.

Next Tuesday, I am going to go to Family Law Information Center. You are right. Those people probably know the proper legal procedure.

Have a good long weekend and happen family day
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Old 02-12-2010, 09:36 PM
#1StepMom #1StepMom is offline
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Nick, check out this online resource: Hostile Aggressive Parenting - Emotional & mental child abuse It is a great place to start building a repertoire of information about HAP and PAS. There are quizzes there you can take to see how severe your HAP/PAS situation is.

You can also check out Hostile Aggressive Parenting where you can find links to support groups and websites about PAS.

All the best to you, friend.
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Old 02-12-2010, 10:25 PM
nick2009 nick2009 is offline
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Thank you #1StepMom,

The websites you mentioned are very helpful. I always believe that the way EX treat and teach my daughter will be permanent dent on her memory. that innocent girl has been the very first victim of the failed marriage. This is so wrong. That little girl deserves mentally and physically to be protected by this society and the law.

I appreciate your support

happen family day to you all.
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