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Financial Issues This forum is for discussing any of the financial issues involved in your divorce.

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  #21  
Old 06-22-2021, 11:09 PM
trueblue22 trueblue22 is offline
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Originally Posted by rockscan View Post
It doesn�t matter what you are comfortable with. If he said he wasn�t comfortable giving disclosure because he doesn�t want you to know his income would you accept that? Im sure the answer is no.

You chose to open a business and you also chose to pay your boyfriend a salary rather than take one yourself. You don�t get to say no to disclosure because you made a bad decision.

As for your trust claim, it�s not as much as you want and it definitely isn�t 25k a month.

Your kids will have to quit private school and some of their activities. If you can�t afford them and he doesn�t want to do them then it�s a no. Not to mention he isn�t going to pay you spousal so you can afford expenses. That�s not how it works.


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He has no problem keeping them in. I have no problem letting them continue this but I can afford to contribute anything to it.
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  #22  
Old 06-23-2021, 07:35 AM
standing on the sidelines standing on the sidelines is offline
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Originally Posted by trueblue22 View Post
He has no problem keeping them in. I have no problem letting them continue this but I can afford to contribute anything to it.
They are your kids also so you have to contribute to their upbringing also...stop being a sugar momma on your husbands dime
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  #23  
Old 06-23-2021, 09:05 AM
Brampton33 Brampton33 is offline
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For the 500th time TrueBlue.....

The house will be sold. You cannot afford to buy it on your own. It will be sold.

You will receive offset CS as you share equal parenting. Given your ex's salary, it will be an amount 99% of people on this forum would bend over backwards to receive.

You will likely qualify for a period of SS.

S.7 expenditures are to be divided in accordance with your salaries. Again, he will likely be on hook for 90% of these expenditures given your disproportionate salaries.

You will get some equalization from the value of the home and any other assets your had during the marriage.

You are making this much more complicated than need be. Submit an updated financial statement and get on with finalizing your separation. Any lawyer should be able to come up with the terms fairly easily. The fact that your lawyer is not pressing for closure tells me he is milking you for as much as he can. Also, it was bad advice from your lawyer to tell you to change the locks to the house. So think about it....if your lawyer is really looking out for your best interest, or lining their own wallet?

Also- from everything that I have read, there are strong possibilities you be liable for your ex's legal fees. Pushing back because he wants to renovate his house prior to its sale? Refusing to leave house but not buy him out? Both are not reasonable behaviours and would be likely result in 100% cost award to ex.

Last edited by Brampton33; 06-23-2021 at 09:24 AM. Reason: added comment on costs
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  #24  
Old 06-23-2021, 11:40 AM
iona6656 iona6656 is offline
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Originally Posted by paris View Post
This is what I’ve been saying all along. Troll.
same. same.
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  #25  
Old 06-24-2021, 08:58 AM
trueblue22 trueblue22 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rockscan View Post
It doesn�t matter what you are comfortable with. If he said he wasn�t comfortable giving disclosure because he doesn�t want you to know his income would you accept that? Im sure the answer is no.

You chose to open a business and you also chose to pay your boyfriend a salary rather than take one yourself. You don�t get to say no to disclosure because you made a bad decision.

As for your trust claim, it�s not as much as you want and it definitely isn�t 25k a month.

Your kids will have to quit private school and some of their activities. If you can�t afford them and he doesn�t want to do them then it�s a no. Not to mention he isn�t going to pay you spousal so you can afford expenses. That�s not how it works.


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I am pursuing a trust claim so I can get 50% of the increase in the value of the house since separation. That's easily an additional 200 to 400k in my pocket which is worth fighting for. My child and spousal support combined should be about 25k a month so my children's lifestyle with me does not differ too much from my ex's.

My ex and I both want the children to be in private school. I want them to have the best of everything I just can't afford to pay for it but he can.
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  #26  
Old 06-24-2021, 09:03 AM
trueblue22 trueblue22 is offline
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Originally Posted by standing on the sidelines View Post
They are your kids also so you have to contribute to their upbringing also...stop being a sugar momma on your husbands dime
I can't afford to contribute. If I contribute I won't have any money left for anything else except food.
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  #27  
Old 06-24-2021, 11:20 AM
Brampton33 Brampton33 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by trueblue22 View Post
. My child and spousal support combined should be about 25k a month so my children's lifestyle with me does not differ too much from my ex's.
For the 501st time TrueBlue....

Child Support: You will receive offset which due to his salary will be a hefty chunk of change. There are many programs on the internet that can be used to calculate this. All you need to do is plug in your ex's salary and your salary. Child support is easy and straight forward.

Spousal Support: You "may" qualify for a short period of spousal support. Things considered on whether or not you qualify is the duration of marriage, and whether you gave up career opportunities to raise the family. Sounds to me like you are educated and were employed at a Director level at one point? You are capable of making your own money so spousal support may be very limited.

Money: You will get a fair equalization of the division of assets accumulated during the marriage. You are not the first person to separate with a house. It will be renovated and sold. This can all easily be figured out.

Outcome: Sounds to me like your ex is moving forward with finalizing your separation after 5 years (finally!). Work on getting your paperwork (financial statement) in order and stop dragging your heels. The lifestyle at your place versus your ex's place will be different. He makes $900k per year. You do not. Get used to it. With your offset CS, income, and new boyfriend's income, you should be on your feet and able to enjoy life in your new reality. Your life will be harder, however, if you are ordered to pay your ex's legal bills, which based on all you said, is a strong possibility.
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  #28  
Old 06-24-2021, 02:44 PM
rockscan rockscan is offline
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Originally Posted by trueblue22 View Post
I can't afford to contribute. If I contribute I won't have any money left for anything else except food.

You really need to review your spending. $5000 a month in cs is high. If you cant contribute because you arent paying yourself a salary then you need to do some serious consideration of your employment, earning potential and lifestyle. For the umpteenth time, your ex husband is no longer responsible for supporting you. Get a job and start taking care of yourself. You are responsible for your children not your boyfriend and his kids.
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  #29  
Old 06-24-2021, 04:12 PM
standing on the sidelines standing on the sidelines is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by trueblue22 View Post
I can't afford to contribute. If I contribute I won't have any money left for anything else except food.
Then do like every other person with limited funds does, make a budget and make cuts. You need to look after your kids first before you look after your boyfriend. You are putting your boyfriend before your kids.
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  #30  
Old 06-25-2021, 12:23 PM
trueblue22 trueblue22 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Brampton33 View Post
For the 501st time TrueBlue....

Child Support: You will receive offset which due to his salary will be a hefty chunk of change. There are many programs on the internet that can be used to calculate this. All you need to do is plug in your ex's salary and your salary. Child support is easy and straight forward.

Spousal Support: You "may" qualify for a short period of spousal support. Things considered on whether or not you qualify is the duration of marriage, and whether you gave up career opportunities to raise the family. Sounds to me like you are educated and were employed at a Director level at one point? You are capable of making your own money so spousal support may be very limited.

Money: You will get a fair equalization of the division of assets accumulated during the marriage. You are not the first person to separate with a house. It will be renovated and sold. This can all easily be figured out.

Outcome: Sounds to me like your ex is moving forward with finalizing your separation after 5 years (finally!). Work on getting your paperwork (financial statement) in order and stop dragging your heels. The lifestyle at your place versus your ex's place will be different. He makes $900k per year. You do not. Get used to it. With your offset CS, income, and new boyfriend's income, you should be on your feet and able to enjoy life in your new reality. Your life will be harder, however, if you are ordered to pay your ex's legal bills, which based on all you said, is a strong possibility.
I don't think it's going to be that easy. He's not going to agree to give me child support based on almost double his previous income when we were together.

My ex wants a full income report to account for perks I received at my old job so he can argue I'm capable of making more than 150k+. My perks were off the books worth over 100k.
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