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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #11  
Old 04-08-2019, 04:37 PM
Selfrepmom Selfrepmom is offline
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Sounds like my ex. not a fun situation
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  #12  
Old 04-08-2019, 07:02 PM
rockscan rockscan is offline
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Almost all agreements state that the holiday schedule overrides the regular schedule. This is because almost all agreements switch off holidays. If they didnít then one parent may get shafted on holidays because their access time never falls on the holiday. Its basically to ensure the holidays are balanced. Your agreement uses weird words but it states the holidays override the regular schedule. Your ex is trying to argue its his weekend so it doesnít matter. He has no leg to stand on because you have the holiday rule.

To be kind, youíve offered him MORE time on YOUR weekend and he is being a jerk about it. If he doesnít want to play nice, you follow the agreement and he gets bupkiss.
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  #13  
Old 04-11-2019, 02:47 PM
Mom 2 Two Mom 2 Two is online now
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So Dad was full on advised of what time to bring children home and his lawyer says his position has not changed. He is refusing to bring the children home at the end of his access period.

How bad will this look on him since we currently are in litigation??

He has been informed of the expected return time after many efforts to offer more time than his normal access.

Iím not sure why his Lawyer isnít making it clear what his actions may cause.

This would be the second time the children have missed holiday time with me because of his refusal to cooperate.


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  #14  
Old 04-11-2019, 02:51 PM
iona6656 iona6656 is offline
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I'm not sure what your options are in terms of getting him to comply when it looks like he won't.

Will it be the *worst* thing if you miss your holiday with them? if not. I would not die on this hill and spend tons of money trying to "win" this battle. Instead, I would send correspondence and let him know that you're really disappointed with his decision to not follow your agreement. That this really hurts the kids because they're missing another holiday with their mom.

Basically- write it like a judge is going to be reading this at trial and think "what a dick".
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  #15  
Old 04-11-2019, 02:54 PM
Mom 2 Two Mom 2 Two is online now
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Quote:
Originally Posted by iona6656 View Post
I'm not sure what your options are in terms of getting him to comply when it looks like he won't.

Will it be the *worst* thing if you miss your holiday with them? if not. I would not die on this hill and spend tons of money trying to "win" this battle. Instead, I would send correspondence and let him know that you're really disappointed with his decision to not follow your agreement. That this really hurts the kids because they're missing another holiday with their mom.

Basically- write it like a judge is going to be reading this at trial and think "what a dick".


I have already accepted they will be missing it. Iím just wondering how I can include it in the SC brief to show he has now done this twice... he is blatantly ignoring a binding separation agreement that is filed with the courts. Yet if I were to do this with any aspect of it boom I am denying access and with holding the kids.


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  #16  
Old 04-11-2019, 03:01 PM
iona6656 iona6656 is offline
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Someone can correct me if I'm wrong- but I don't think this is something that is really dealt with at a settlement conference or included in the brief. This type of behaviour is the stuff you use at trial.

What you want to do in your offer(s) to settle though is to give your agreement some teeth to enforce these clauses. I have no idea what those are though.

What do you put in an agreement when you know the other party is going to blatantly ignore the agreement at their discretion?

I wonder if you can include penalty clauses in final agreements? lol.
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  #17  
Old 04-11-2019, 03:04 PM
Mom 2 Two Mom 2 Two is online now
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Thanks Iona... at this point he is trying to completely change the agreement with no material change in circumstance. And I am quite certain we will end up in trial sadly.


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  #18  
Old 04-11-2019, 03:08 PM
rockscan rockscan is offline
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You can use it in your brief as simply : you offered more time, he refused it. Not only did he refuse it, he refused to return the children in a timely manner.

He has made several mistakes in his legal plans. If you are going to argue for more time and make accusations that the ex is not working with you, you need to behave yourself and do everything in the original order AND what is asked of you. Hes now trying to bully you into agreeing his improper actions are ok.

If he doesnít return them on time, it looks bad on him going forward. You will simply use it as ďrefuses to follow the agreementĒ.

As I said privately, judges err on the side of your agreement because you both AGREED. If he wants to change it and you donít agree, you need a judge. A judge has not made any new orders or changes therefore it is the agreement that stands.
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