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Financial Issues This forum is for discussing any of the financial issues involved in your divorce.

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  #1  
Old 09-26-2019, 02:22 AM
bcgooddad bcgooddad is offline
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Default Undue Hardship

Anybody here win a claim for undue hardship? My ex is taking me to court for an extra $400/month that I can't afford.


I make ~$50k/year, no partner. Two kids, two baby mama's. One 12 y.o., I parent 40% and pay $200 CS.



The other is the issue at hand, 5 y.o., I parent 30% and pay $300. We live ten hours apart, I pick her up and she is with me for a week, then her mom comes and picks her up. I home school when she is with me. The travel costs about $300/month. We agreed on reduced cs amount when I agreed to the move a year ago, and I supply all clothes etc in my home. Now she wants full amount, plus $250/month day care and school costs.

All in, it would be about $1000/month, $12k/year, including the travel. That is almost a third of my income after taxes, and that's before I've started parenting either of my kids. Is that reasonable?? My rent is another third. And my car is on it's last legs, and with winter coming, ten hours on the road is a serious consideration, so I really need to purchase a new one.



I know CS and expenses are pretty standard stuff, but how likely is it a judge would grant undue hardship with my income? What would I have to prove to get this? The two criteria as I see it are obligations to support another child and high access costs.



It's kind of dangerous to our child if I can't afford a good vehicle because of so much money going out, while I am also parenting 30%. I don't want to come across as cheap or whiny, I know this is tough road, just trying to be able to take care of my family, and feeling pretty undermined.


Thanks
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  #2  
Old 09-26-2019, 08:48 AM
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Originally Posted by bcgooddad View Post
Anybody here win a claim for undue hardship? My ex is taking me to court for an extra $400/month that I can't afford. I make ~$50k/year, no partner
If you had three kids, normal table CS would be about $1000 a month. Courts do not consider that to be hardship, they consider that to be the expected amount.

Seems like you would be paying $600 a month total for your kids, doesn't sounds too disastrous. Nothing even remotely close to hardship.


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The other is the issue at hand, 5 y.o., I parent 30%
In child support world, 30% = 0%

You get almost no credit for the 30%. Interestingly, there are exceptions, and they do sorta apply to you, but I was just pointing out for other parents that 30% is equivalent to not seeing the kid at all in terms of child support.

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We live ten hours apart, I pick her up and she is with me for a week, then her mom comes and picks her up. I home school when she is with me. The travel costs about $300/month.
Relevant travel costs for parenting time can reduce child support. That is your key argument.

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Now she wants full amount, plus $250/month day care and school costs.
Daycare is the quintessential section 7 expense. You will have to pay your proportionate share of it. I'm not sure what "school costs" mean. If it is private school tuition, that can go either way. If it is pencils and binders, that is covered under child support.

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All in, it would be about $1000/month, $12k/year, including the travel. That is almost a third of my income after taxes, and that's before I've started parenting either of my kids. Is that reasonable??
Well, it may or may not be reasonable, but it is almost certainly how much you are going to end up paying.

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My rent is another third.
I'm sure you can find a more rundown place to live. The kid mostly lives with mom. It is more important that she has a nice place. That's why you give her money. Courts don't care about where you live.

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And my car is on it's last legs, and with winter coming, ten hours on the road is a serious consideration, so I really need to purchase a new one.
I just did a quick check on auto trader. There are 3452 listings for cars that are $2000 or less.

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I know CS and expenses are pretty standard stuff, but how likely is it a judge would grant undue hardship with my income? What would I have to prove to get this? The two criteria as I see it are obligations to support another child and high access costs.
High access costs is where your argument needs to go. That said, your income is not very low, and your access costs are not very high. Also, your one week home schooling arrangement is doomed. Unless you can move close to the 5y/o I would probably assume that you will only be seeing her 2 days a month in the near future.


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just trying to be able to take care of my family, and feeling pretty undermined.
You are a non-custodial parent. You take care of your family by paying child support. If you wanted to play a more active role in your kid's life you should not have agreed to becoming a non-custodial parent.
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Old 09-26-2019, 09:23 AM
pinkmorganite pinkmorganite is offline
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I understand the struggle on your end.

You will need to prove that you will have a lower standard of living in comparison to her.

What is her yearly income?
How many children does she support? (child care expenses are normally always mandatory to pay proportional share towards)
Does she have a spouse?
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Old 09-26-2019, 10:00 AM
rockscan rockscan is offline
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You’ve posted a few times about the issue with your expenses and your ex moving away. The problem is you agreed to her moving away. This forum pointed out to you there would be a problem with the moving away situation as the child aged. Your ex set the status quo and now you are going to have to fight it.

As Janus said, your only argument is high access costs. Even that will be a crapshoot. Forget all the other arguments about time with you etc.
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Old 09-26-2019, 10:15 AM
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You will need to prove that you will have a lower standard of living in comparison to her.
He is a non-custodial parent. His standard of living is supposed to be lower.

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Does she have a spouse?
Irrelevant, he is a NCP

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What is her yearly income?
Only relevant in terms of determining his share of S7 expenses.
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Old 09-26-2019, 04:18 PM
HammerDad HammerDad is offline
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The only argument to be made here is that the ex agreed to the lower amount of c/s in consideration for him allowing her to move with the child 10 hours away.

There is no need for an undue hardship argument to be made. It is more a contract law argument. She offered less c/s to compensate you for allowing her to move. You accepted. Now the ex wants to back out of that arrangement for whatever reason without in some way compensating the OP.

That would be my argument. That I agreed to allow you to move with the child, and you agreed to reduced c/s due to the increased travel costs associated with your move. That either status quo continued or, if the ex wants full c/s, than they need to be responsible for all costs associated with your parenting.
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Old 09-26-2019, 06:30 PM
bcgooddad bcgooddad is offline
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Ok thanks. And if I am paying for half of her child care costs, is responsible for half of mine? She is school age, so I would need a nanny, which would be at least $500/month.
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Old 09-26-2019, 06:41 PM
rockscan rockscan is offline
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If she needs day care for work then yes you have to pay your share of daycare costs. If you need daycare to work then realistically she would need to pay your share but she could also argue that the travel is too much of an impact on her schooling and the home schooling is impacting her education.

As previously stated in your other threads, home schooling isn’t sustainable. As the child ages she will need to be in school full time regardless of your argument for time. Eventually you will become an every other weekend parent.

I would not waste time arguing for daycare while in your care because you are already arguing she can be home schooled to keep your time. The mother can turn around and argue that kid should be in school full time to avoid the extra costs of daycare.

Focus on the contract breach because the rest may end up biting you in the ass.
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Old 09-26-2019, 09:56 PM
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Originally Posted by bcgooddad View Post
Ok thanks. And if I am paying for half of her child care costs, is responsible for half of mine?
Strictly speaking it is proportionate, so if you make 70% of the total income of you and the ex, then you pay 70% of the cost.

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She is school age, so I would need a nanny, which would be at least $500/month.
I thought you were home schooling her? Why would you need a nanny? Presumably you are home during the day to provide said schooling?
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Old 09-27-2019, 02:35 AM
bcgooddad bcgooddad is offline
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Yes homeschooling and working. I do contract work so it depends on how busy I am. But that is the plan.
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