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  • Rights of a 15 year old

    From what I've read on these forums I don't know how well my situation fits into the main topics, I considered using the parenting issues forums, but this is more about a young teens rights than divorce. Although divorced couples I'm certain have faced similar issues.

    My sister wants to leave home and I'm willing to provide a home for her.

    The law is very unclear about this though. Here's what it says for kids 14 and over:

    You can live with someone else against the wishes of your legal guardian. The other person will not be charged with a criminal offence as long as they did not assist you in leaving home.

    I have bolded the statement of concern here. I am not wanting to break any laws but I don't understand them. How can you possibly not assist a child in leaving their home if you give them a place to live? Its a catch 22, isn't it?

    That said, her mother refuses to take her to the dentist even though she has coverage (its been 2 years), she won't get her a birth certificate or a SIN number. The mother doesn't wake up in the morning with her and she misses school frequently from sleeping in. The mother is always home in the mornings when she's missed school, and doesn't hold a steady job/barely works. There are a host of other issues which I don't wish to share here, but I would like to offer my home to her if she wants to leave. I'm not able to fix their family issues, but I am trying to help my sister. Our Dad is deceased incase you're trying to figure that part out....

    Thank you for any help in advance,

    Thebrother.

  • #2
    assist you IN LEAVING. That must be about the process itself So you can't help her pack and can't help her physically to move out.

    Comment


    • #3
      Wow.... such an honourable thing to do... your sister is very lucky to have you!!

      My best advice is to contact a Lawyer to see about gaining legal guardianship over her...

      A tricky situation... but in the end, I am sure you will both be fine!

      Comment


      • #4
        Honourable indeed. How old are you? Are you a student or employed full time? Can you afford to support her? Will you be providing dental benefits for her? Can you and are you prepared to meet all the expectations you find lacking in your mother for her care?

        A little research says your sister can apply for those documents on her own through the Service Canada website, as long as she is over 12 and 13 years (different for each document) she can apply on her own.

        Comment


        • #5
          Its hard to believe I'm reading this. (ie, it sounds too good to be true, or perhaps too easy).

          Her mother will be very mad about this and I'm quite worried about the whole thing. I'm really afraid of getting into trouble with the law I can't afford to do that. As for being her legal guardian, I don't understand why I would want to do that. I'm not her parent so.... ? I'd just be providing her with a place to stay and grow up with good influences around her until she's ready to live on her own. I'm still trying to work on getting things sorted out in her own home with her but its incredibly difficult.

          Thanks again for the advice

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by blinkandimgone View Post
            Honourable indeed. How old are you? Are you a student or employed full time? Can you afford to support her? Will you be providing dental benefits for her? Can you and are you prepared to meet all the expectations you find lacking in your mother for her care?

            A little research says your sister can apply for those documents on her own through the Service Canada website, as long as she is over 12 and 13 years (different for each document) she can apply on her own.
            I'm 34..we're quite far apart in age. I am employed full time, I can afford to support her. I'm not sure if my work benefits would cover her like it does my kids (maybe this is the reason to get legal guardianship?), but I would at least make sure she gets the basic scaling done and see what the dentist says from there we'll see. Your next question is a tough one, but I have and would do the as best I can but her mom is not letting us see each other much anymore which has started leading me to explore this avenue.... My two kids are both happy and healthy and least tell my wife and I that they love us. I know ones opionon of ones own self is bound to be skewed but I'm certain I am at least a good role model for her.

            One question, which documents are you referring to?

            Thanks for your advice.

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by Thebrother View Post
              As for being her legal guardian, I don't understand why I would want to do that. I'm not her parent so.... ?
              Legal guardianship would provide you the power to make decisions on her behalf, regarding medical, educational, legal etc.

              Might come in handy should the need arise...

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by Thebrother View Post
                One question, which documents are you referring to?
                I believe she means the birth certificate and SIN number that you mentioned your sister's mother wasn't getting for her.

                Comment


                • #9
                  If the child is being neglected, she can call CAS herself. CAS is supposed to locate family to place the child at first. (which would be you).

                  And insofar as her missing school, she's 15, not 5. Have her set her alarm clock. It sucks that Mom isn't being a parent, but at 15 she should be reasonably able to handle that herself.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Rioe View Post

                    Quote:
                    Originally Posted by Thebrother
                    One question, which documents are you referring to?
                    I believe she means the birth certificate and SIN number that you mentioned your sister's mother wasn't getting for her.

                    I believe she means the birth certificate and SIN number that you mentioned your sister's mother wasn't getting for her.
                    Yup, this. ^^

                    Sounds like you're doing all the right things or at least have considered what it would take to meet the needs for your sister. Given your age and family situation I can't see where there would be any legal issue if your sister decided to move in with you and your family. Guardianship isn't a half bad idea but realistically, by the time it gets appointed to you she may be beyond the age where it would be required. Right now, at 15, she is able to make most of her own decisions and when she turns 16 she can pretty much do whatever she wants, nobody can force her to live anywhere she doesn't want to.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      If the child wants to live with you at 15 years old, the court isn't in much of a position to stop her. Just do it.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        I moved out at 15 against my moms wishes. I didn't have the family like your sister does but here's some things I learned when I left. If she is closer to being 16 the law will do nothing, if she is more than 2months away from turning 16 the mother CAN cause a problem and you could be looking at kidnapping charges. No joke. The best thing you can do is have your sister call CAS and inform them as to what is going on and also YOU call them and explain what is going on as well. If you do this and her mother is deemed as unfit and such your sister can come live with you, also if removed from the home by CAS your sister will be granted money every month towards her personal needs which would help you cover costs. Also try talking to your sisters school, having a strong support basis through this will turn things more in your favor. It all depends on the reaction of your sisters mother, she is old enough though that trying to fight her mother for legal guardian is futile, once your sister is 16 and NOT living with her mother by law she does not need her mothers consent for things and can name you her next of kin on everything. Speak to CAS though and in a case like this they should be able to provide you and your sister help or at the very least advice.
                        Best of luck,

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          You refer to her as sister, but also "her mother". Is her mother not your mother? Is she your half-sister?
                          I think if she would be happier, she should live with you and your family. Sometimes what CAS deems as unfit does not mean best case scenario. I would want my siblings to be raised in a home that was a lot more than "fit". Who cares if she is "able" to get up herself, and get her own paperwork done. Who wants to live like that at that young age? Unless there is no other option? If you can provide, love, encouragement, and day to day consistancy,in a family rich environment, you will be doing a wonderful thing.
                          Cheers......

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by mama2bee View Post
                            I moved out at 15 against my moms wishes. I didn't have the family like your sister does but here's some things I learned when I left. If she is closer to being 16 the law will do nothing, if she is more than 2months away from turning 16 the mother CAN cause a problem and you could be looking at kidnapping charges. No joke. The best thing you can do is have your sister call CAS and inform them as to what is going on and also YOU call them and explain what is going on as well. If you do this and her mother is deemed as unfit and such your sister can come live with you, also if removed from the home by CAS your sister will be granted money every month towards her personal needs which would help you cover costs. Also try talking to your sisters school, having a strong support basis through this will turn things more in your favor. It all depends on the reaction of your sisters mother, she is old enough though that trying to fight her mother for legal guardian is futile, once your sister is 16 and NOT living with her mother by law she does not need her mothers consent for things and can name you her next of kin on everything. Speak to CAS though and in a case like this they should be able to provide you and your sister help or at the very least advice.
                            Best of luck,
                            Thanks so much for sharing your experience and how it might relate to our situation. I don't know what her mother would do, but I'm definitely not getting involved if kidnapping is the outcome. She's about 8 months from 16 so maybe in 6 months we can revisit this. She's not being physically abused at home, but she's being neglected in a lot of ways and its so hard for me to help from the outside, she needs a good home to really start turning around. she is being mentally abused in my opinion, this is one of the biggest reasons I want to get her out but I don't really have time to deal with too much more than I already am (ie, CAS)...

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by CISTEAD View Post
                              You refer to her as sister, but also "her mother". Is her mother not your mother? Is she your half-sister?
                              I think if she would be happier, she should live with you and your family. Sometimes what CAS deems as unfit does not mean best case scenario. I would want my siblings to be raised in a home that was a lot more than "fit". Who cares if she is "able" to get up herself, and get her own paperwork done. Who wants to live like that at that young age? Unless there is no other option? If you can provide, love, encouragement, and day to day consistancy,in a family rich environment, you will be doing a wonderful thing.
                              Cheers......

                              We have the same father, he died about 12 years ago. She would easily be happier, there are issues relating to my wife and kids, my part is not an issue, but it's a significant change to our home to having her live here, she's used to living much differently than we do..she's more than willing to try which is really good, and I've gone through the major things that would be different for her living here (school expectations, type of clothing she's wearing, getting work over the summer, helping around the house, etc). My wife and I have both been working full time or in school all our adult lives, and we are pretty much home bodies that love and nurture our home and immediate family environment.

                              Comment

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