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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #11  
Old 08-24-2012, 10:50 AM
HammerDad HammerDad is offline
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Originally Posted by HBW View Post
Thanks Raven. I did ask him if wanted to Skype with the kids, but never got a response...
I'd still put it in the offer/parenting plan that he get regular scheduled skype time. It looks good on your behalf that you are doing what you can to facilitate the relationship.

If he chooses not to use it, that is his fault....
  #12  
Old 08-24-2012, 11:06 AM
HBW HBW is offline
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Thanks HammerDad, I will do that!
  #13  
Old 08-24-2012, 11:47 AM
raven70 raven70 is offline
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Default jurisdiction

That is a good gesture that you volutarely offered webcam, i did not have this privedge, our issues major and minor were court solved, although now there is some team work some 2 years later.

You were asking about travel, i have no stipulations where i can travel with my child when access occurs in Ont, although at 3.5 he is not quite ready to leave Ont i think, so access occurs in that province.

Some other cases that i am aware of that were simular involved full child support with a split of travel costs, otheres like mine a CS reduction.,

Note that access costs are greater that you most likely think, mine are 1500 weekly visit and that involves basics

raven
  #14  
Old 08-24-2012, 12:46 PM
HBW HBW is offline
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Thanks Raven! Does that mean your X pays you $1500 for a weekly visit to Ontario? Does that include travel costs? Is the $1500 based on income? Sorry for all the questions; I just want to be prepared.
  #15  
Old 08-24-2012, 09:11 PM
raven70 raven70 is offline
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Default child support reduction

I pay CS to the mom in Ont who has sole custody. The CS reduction if for access costs, she does not also assist with access costs, the CS reduction is it.

I am aware of cases where full CS is ordered and then the couple shares travel expeneses, depends on the justice and how they impliment it.

If a parent does not travel for access, or prove that they are, a justice will not order a reduction, i submitted 10000.00 in reciepts for a year and therefore was reduced to CS payment less 400.00 or 40% of the table amount.

Three Ont justices who dealt with us agreed that there should be a CS reduction because i was and am consistanly traveling for access.

To honestly answer your question, there is a chance you will not win jurisdiction, however your ex did not deal with it in a timely matter which is your favour, a court order from Alberta in a Ont jurisdiction hearing, from my experience could be a issue for you, but seems he is not taking it in that direction.

any more questions, feel free, raven
  #16  
Old 08-24-2012, 11:12 PM
HBW HBW is offline
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Wow Raven, you have been so helpful, thank you!
  #17  
Old 08-25-2012, 12:12 AM
Gladtobesingleagain Gladtobesingleagain is offline
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Where did your ex file divorce paperwork? In Alberta?

Ask that your file be transferred to the court in Ontario, that is transfer jurisdiction, citing that the children are now more substantially connected to Ontario. Note family, schools, friends, activities etc.

Beneficial so you don't have to pay a lawyer to rep you in Alberta as you can do it yourself in Ontario.

Also helpful if the court in Ontario has a greater turnaround time on cases--some courthouses are notoriously inundated with files.

The downside for you is that you took the children without court consent and without his agreement (it sounds like it). You will need to explain to a judge why. It's not generally a good idea but there are case law in which a judge is ok with it.

Look up on canlii for case law similar to yours.

CanLII - 2004 BCSC 868 (CanLII)

This is one. Mom left with kids who were both under 4 after dad moved in with best friend. She left for home. He waited 15 months to file paperwork. Judge said though removal was wrongful the dad didn't take into consideration that he'd left her in a situation with two small kids and no money. So he allowed the file to transfer.

As for custody, these days judges are not so keen on awarding sole custody. there are piles and piles of NCP who see their kids once maybe twice a year if lucky, yet have joint custody of kids far away in different time zones or even countries. You would probably have to prove why with evidence that he is not suitable to have joint custody. Maybe perhaps the alcohol makes his judgement poor, but you will need evidence of this in the past. Not just hunches or hearsay. Perhaps the violence is an issue but again there must be evidence.

You said he was agreeable to your choice of school. That is good. Perhaps if you think the both of you could work jointly on an area of the kids lives, then seek joint on that but sole on the other. That is, maybe offer to share decision making on education, but if you have absolute impasses on religion, ask that you make those decisions solely.

At the end of the day, with the distance between you, most likely even if you get joint custody, a judge will say you have final decision on the issue and he can take it to court if he disagrees.

Good luck
  #18  
Old 08-25-2012, 08:47 AM
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Thank you GladtobeSingleAgain! You have been extremely helpful!

I'm baffled, because my lawyer already contacted my STBX in March to start negotiations and he messaged her that he'd provide full financial disclosure in May (he still had to complete 4 years worth of income taxes... plus he wanted to go on a 2 month army course). Then again in June he texted me telling me he was moving forward with getting taxes done and retaining a lawyer, and I was given the impression that we would be working together, and avoiding the court process. Then he suddenly turned around and served me?!?!? I don't know what to think.

In case I decide to seek sole custody, do you think the following would stand in court? I've made a 911 call where police came and took a report (he came home extremely drunk one night with blood all over himself trying to convince me he was a warrior. When I chuckled, he threatened to come after me with his fist) On another occasion he provoked a fight with his brother (breaking his rib) in front of his entire family and later got a public intoxication charge. His own sister later told us that her daughter no longer felt safe in our home. I've also called the Distress Centre where a women came and provided support in my home.

My greatest concern in all this is that he is a trained soldier and his place is loaded with guns. I've had to receive therapy because he was so mentally and emotionally abusive... my therapist thinks I suffered from Post-Tramautic Stress.

I am just so, so, so tired....
  #19  
Old 08-27-2012, 02:04 PM
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Tayken Tayken is offline
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Originally Posted by HBW View Post
Just in case he's serious, what are the chances are he'd be granted joint custody and we have to move back? The kids (now aged 4 and 6) are long established here and have a good—safe—home!
So long as you didn't do anything as outlined in the following threads / case law you shouldn't have anything to worry about:

http://www.ottawadivorce.com/forum/f...ase-law-12665/

Hong v. Rooney, 2012 ONSC 120 (CanLII)
Date: 2012-01-05
Docket: FC-10-034352-00
URL: CanLII - 2012 ONSC 120 (CanLII)
Citation: Hong v. Rooney, 2012 ONSC 120 (CanLII)
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