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  • #31
    I give up.

    Grace, you had written in this same thread:

    It is true that many female members have felt under attack over this. And if the women leave this the forum it will only have one voice, that of a male perspective. This is not what Jeff wants, nor do I believe the majority of all members. So stay strong ladies, and keep on posting. Your voices need to be heard. And for some of you its the first time you have a voice and are being heard. Your contributions are invaluable.
    I wrote:

    Grace has rightfully brought up the need for perhaps engaging women's opinions in a way that will help them feel that this is an inclusive venue - I am all for that.
    Maybe I'm wrong but I think I was echoing what you said.
    Last edited by Divorcemanagement; 05-09-2006, 06:21 AM.

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    • #32
      for cryin' out loud.

      get over it.

      I think Sean has been courageous in apologizing, if people choose not to accept the apology, that's their choice - but it isn't his fault.

      I have read everything he has posted - and I suspect he is not well liked by the people who hold extreme views of their 'rights' - as mothers, as full custodial parents, as spousal support receipients, because he doesn't lean strongly to 'your' side.

      Instead - he does what we would all be better served by doing - he takes and HONEST AND FAIR approach to how relationships should end.

      Keep up the good work Sean - and I will repeat here what I sent to you in a PM - I think your clients are blessed to have you as part of their process. I only wish in either of my personal situations we had found a professional as balanced and sensitive to all of our concerns.

      Comment


      • #33
        Thanks for the vote of confidence workingthruit. I have tried to address everyone's concerns but apparently I am unable to give their desired response.

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        • #34
          Originally posted by workingthruit
          get over it.

          I think Sean has been courageous in apologizing, if people choose not to accept the apology, that's their choice - but it isn't his fault.
          Well we don't see what he has done as an apology. The analogy I used was

          " I'm sorry i punched you in the face' and "I'm sorry you were upset that I punched you in the face". I personally would not accept the second as a true apology. But I suppose some would.

          This forum has lost Grace as a moderator - it is a sad day. I think it may lose a bunch of us and it can go on as a forum for those who want it a certain way. Enjoy when and if that happens.

          Comment


          • #35
            Jenny,

            What exact words would you like to see from Sean that will constitute as a proper apology?

            I think it may lose a bunch of us and it can go on as a forum for those who want it a certain way
            This forum is what the members make of it. If you want to see changes, well then I guess you'll have to stick around

            Lindsay

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            • #36
              Well I think his choice of words is pretty clear. His ego won't let him actually take responsibility for what he said. Only can comment on how we took it. At this point I feel he won't ever do it. I just refuse to see the " I'm sorry you are upset with me punching you" kind of apology as an apology. It just isn't one. But he saves face because he gets to play the good guy and how everyone sees it as one- except those he offended.

              I am saddened we have lost Grace as a moderator and probably a poster. She was one of the best posters on here.
              Last edited by Jeff; 05-10-2006, 02:49 AM.

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              • #37
                Hi

                I've been following this thread and kept quiet. I feel that this forum is not supportive at all of many of its contributing members.

                Sean,

                All I have to say is you dance and dance around issues, you as a new moderator has caused an uproar in this forum. Upset many people including myself and have caused some amazing members to leave this forum. That's a shame.

                I thought you were done posting on this thread......why did you continue to post after you said it.
                Last edited by Jeff; 05-10-2006, 02:11 PM.

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                • #38
                  Sorry to lose you, sherif28. Best of luck in the future!

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                  • #39
                    Had to return

                    Well, first and foremost, my apologies for not contributing lately.

                    I have been what some might coin as experiencing the 'wilderness' or needing time to fight one's own battle -- ALONE.

                    I quickly drop by to see how my friends are doing and well, it would seem that the battle has moved on over here.

                    I am shocked by Grace's decision to stop being a 'moderator' ... not only is she a good friend, but a person with great spirit. We are all great spirited people, we are tested in our lives by what some say or do to us, what really is of importance is how we respond. I truly hope Grace would reconsider her decision, cause someone, somewhere may be needing to hear what she has to say in these forums. Grace, think of all the goodness you can do in peoples lives ... pls stay!

                    DM, your contriubtions have been helpful and insighful to many. The important thing is to 'take' what it is you need for your particular situation my friends. It's sort of like the 10/90 rule when reading a book. 10% of the book contains the important information and the other 90% is filler. Same with these posts, take the 10% that is usefull to you and if something bothers you, that would more than likely be the 90% filler ... let it go.

                    Words do have the power to hurt or heal and for those that may have been hurt recently ... let me spell it out "On behalf of ____, I'm sorry" ... pls, for the benefit of all, lets 'love one another' again.

                    OK, I've got to be getting back to the 'wilderness'

                    Love,

                    Hubby

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                    • #40
                      Sorry to lose you too, Jenny. Your invaluable contributions will be missed!

                      Lindsay

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                      • #41
                        Well put, Hubby!

                        We've missed your positive attitude around here!

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                        • #42
                          I just washed my dishes and thought about this more... why were my PMs erased?

                          I can understand why my signature was erased, although I would have appreciated someone 'asking' me to do it... of course I would have. It was riske.

                          But my Private Messages? What is going on? I don't understand... what have I done wrong except voice my feelings on what I thought was an inappropriate remark? I wasn't mean, I simply said how I felt.

                          What's going on?

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                          • #43
                            Only moderators can have signatures.

                            PMs are not working for everyone. I'm not sure why PMs were deleted - if that happened that's accidental.
                            Ottawa Divorce

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                            • #44
                              Beltane and Jenny,

                              It's clear that your purpose for being on the forums has changed. You're not here to help or get support, but rather to bash the forums and promote your own site.

                              Beltane, I've just re-read your last 25 posts (out of the 40 total you made) and over half of them contributed nothing other than criticisms of the forums. Then, days later you start a new site and Jenny asks people to leave here and join your site. Talk about an ulterior motive.

                              I'm surprised either of you think I would allow people to come here and make a dozen or more posts that are critical, make no helpful comments, ask people to leave and join another site, and I would do nothing about it. E.g. try that with your employer -- criticise your employer publicly, don't do anything helpful at work, ask people to quit and go to another employer -- and see if you'd be permitted to do this.
                              Last edited by Jeff; 05-10-2006, 03:48 PM.
                              Ottawa Divorce

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