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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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Old 12-02-2021, 05:15 PM
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Originally Posted by mafia007 View Post
My children were 14, 12 and 7 when we broke up. My ex wanted to keep the house so I did everything and gave her all the time she needed to do so. A thing I will regret as it plays a lot against me for parenting time.

When she lost at trial and had to make the equalization payment, she almost had to sell the house and used that to side the children against me. If I would have known, I would have simply ask for the house to be listed so I could have a fare share from the market. That would have destabilized the so call good comfort of living in the same home. I'm pretty sure things would have been different with ex having to move in a less good looking house at a lower value in a much different neighbourhood. All because I was thinking of the best interest of the children.

My advice, if the best interest of the children is in favor of the interest of your ex, do not aby. F**k the best interest when it does not help your own interest. Brampton33 just pointed out. Children will most often choose to live in the same house because this is what they are used to. It's sad, but to preserve a relationship with your children with higher chances it is better when the matrimonial home is sold so none of the parent is favorized over the other.

In Family Court, only consider YOUR interest being the best interest of the children.

Ya I second this despite the fact I am a child of divorce. In my husbands case, he turned down fighting for an additional $100,000 to $200,000 in the best interest of the kids but all he got was anger and resentment because mom was in debt for having to buy him out. It was back at the tail end of the recession and she could have found something else for a reasonable price but she dug in and he was tired of fighting and wanted to stop the madness for his kids sake. They ended up siding with mom on all her lies and have no contact with him. (I have many feelings which I will save)

In my familys case, the house was an albatross we couldnt shake. We had to do all the work and while I learned a lot about home maintenance and being a property owner, no 10-14 year old should have to manage basement flooding, grass cutting and shoveling a giant driveway. It was entirely my moms doing and my siblings and I ended up in big debt having to take out loans for things like a new roof, a newer car and other property maintenance issues. She wanted to stay in the house but we would have survived elsewhere.

Staying in the matrimonial home is such a bs best for the kids issue and OCL should probably update it to a stable home environment and full access to both parents. It should be an overall approach not the out dated crap they do now.
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Old 12-04-2021, 01:38 AM
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Originally Posted by Brampton33 View Post
This is certainly a conundrum many face. Often after a divorce, parents are in a battle with eachother to "offer a better home" in hopes that the kids will eventually express wanting to exclusively live with them. Some buy extravagant gifts and fill the house with toys, pools, and trampolines. Others let the kids run free with no rules at their home to try to be the "cool home". At that age, it is important for kids to maintain and build relationships with both their parents. Both parents should be working together at promoting this, not enabling them to be eroded.
This does work with children over 14. But, when under 14 and an existing order is in place the "material change of circumstance" bar is hard to climb. I have a feeling someone accidently consented or agreed a material change occurred. Most worth-their-weight lawyers representing the OP would crush this at the material change point and never allow their client to consent to OCL.

I suspect someone consented to OCL... Now they have to deal with the med they made.

No one should ever invite the OCL into their case. (Or a Section 30 assessor!)
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