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Financial Issues This forum is for discussing any of the financial issues involved in your divorce.

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  #31  
Old 11-08-2021, 06:16 PM
Stillbreathing Stillbreathing is offline
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I agree with Pink Houses. You cannot reduce the amount you pay in child support without a court order. The judge is the only one with that power. If you do it you will find yourself in deep trouble and FRO can start enforcement actions against you.
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  #32  
Old 11-09-2021, 11:18 AM
Brampton33 Brampton33 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pinkHouses View Post
No, you can't. You are letting your ex get to you.
Keep your receipts, all of them for the stuff you bought and ask for it in your yearly child support motion.
Fair enough. I have been keeping my receipts.

What do you mean by child support motion? Annually we exchange financial info and update child support payments for the next year, and re-calculate our percentage of how we are to pay for s.7 expenditures for the following year. This does not happen in court. We just do it via email. Are you saying I should bring it up the next time we update our finances?
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  #33  
Old 11-09-2021, 11:28 AM
rockscan rockscan is offline
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If you were to file a motion to change cs, you would put in there that she owes you a certain amount of money. When you update each year you could say you will take $$$ off each month until the amounts are paid but she could disagree.
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  #34  
Old 11-09-2021, 11:43 AM
Brampton33 Brampton33 is offline
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Originally Posted by rockscan View Post
If you were to file a motion to change cs, you would put in there that she owes you a certain amount of money. When you update each year you could say you will take $$$ off each month until the amounts are paid but she could disagree.
Our Final Order is set up that there should not be any reason to ever go to court to change CS. Unless one of us were to lose our jobs, I guess. Otherwise we just provide updates on our income and adjust the offset CS and s.7 proportion each year.

Your proposal to take the $ off works for outstanding s.7 expenditures, as the court order outlines that these are to be split in accordance to salaries. However, this solution does not work for stuff like winter gear as that does not fall within a s.7 expenditure category.
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  #35  
Old 11-09-2021, 02:54 PM
rockscan rockscan is offline
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Then you suck it up and pay the cost. Are your kids warm? Are they safe? Stop fighting about petty things. Your ex is being a pain. Let her buy the shits next year or you suck it up and accept it as the cost of doing business.
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  #36  
Old 11-10-2021, 08:00 AM
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This is some of the most petty nonsense I have seen in a while.

Penny wise... Pound foolish...

Nickel and dime...
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  #37  
Old 11-10-2021, 10:44 AM
LovingDad1234 LovingDad1234 is online now
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tayken View Post
This is some of the most petty nonsense I have seen in a while.

Penny wise... Pound foolish...

Nickel and dime...
I think Brampton's frustrating is that (from his posts) his ex fought to restrict his access to his kids, claiming that she loved her kids etc... But yet she is not paying her fair share of expenditures that don't fall under s.7. It is typical to see this petty behaviour when a case goes through the court system.

Lets face it, if people are in court, its because they clearly have harsh feelings towards the other and lack of mutual respect. I have friends who caught their spouse cheating. Despite the shock, sorrow and anger towards the other spouse, they needed no arm-twisting to say "my ex-husband is the kids' father and the kids should be allowed to see their dad 50% just like they are 50% with me". No need for court battle where the only winners are the lawyers.
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  #38  
Old 11-10-2021, 11:46 AM
iona6656 iona6656 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LovingDad1234 View Post
I think Brampton's frustrating is that (from his posts) his ex fought to restrict his access to his kids, claiming that she loved her kids etc... But yet she is not paying her fair share of expenditures that don't fall under s.7. It is typical to see this petty behaviour when a case goes through the court system.

Lets face it, if people are in court, its because they clearly have harsh feelings towards the other and lack of mutual respect. I have friends who caught their spouse cheating. Despite the shock, sorrow and anger towards the other spouse, they needed no arm-twisting to say "my ex-husband is the kids' father and the kids should be allowed to see their dad 50% just like they are 50% with me". No need for court battle where the only winners are the lawyers.
if it's venting. then sure. But if you're going to try to do something about getting 50% of the costs of winter clothes by withholding CS or consider court for it...then you're leaning petty.

This board is a pretty good sounding board/mirror to figure out when you're being petty and spouting nonsense.

Multiple people are saying to Brampton33- arguing over this is petty. Trying to subtract this from CS is nonsense AND will land you in court- costing you more money in the long run.
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  #39  
Old 11-10-2021, 11:53 AM
LovingDad1234 LovingDad1234 is online now
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Quote:
Originally Posted by iona6656 View Post
if it's venting. then sure. But if you're going to try to do something about getting 50% of the costs of winter clothes by withholding CS or consider court for it...then you're leaning petty.

This board is a pretty good sounding board/mirror to figure out when you're being petty and spouting nonsense.

Multiple people are saying to Brampton33- arguing over this is petty. Trying to subtract this from CS is nonsense AND will land you in court- costing you more money in the long run.
Agreed. Its easy to get worked up when dealing with a difficult ex. Ideally, grown adults who decided to have children together would not need court. They would recognize that the $$ spent on lawyers would be better utilized in an RESP account.

Think of it this way, rather than try to extract a few hundred from ex to contribute to things such as snowsuits, boots, shoes etc.. be happy that your kids are warm. As kids get a little older, they can see for themselves who takes them shopping for needed items and who takes care of them with essentials, etc. Just be patient.
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  #40  
Old 11-10-2021, 12:02 PM
Kkc Kkc is offline
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..this is a good line...all the litigation could have gone to RESPs, I am going to use it...

We are working to adjust our support retroactively and impute income:

reasons for not working and why I think there will be something imputted (bear in mind I have kids Friday to Monday morning) in her reply materials:

1. "not attracted to working [in previous field]"...that was verbatim
2. Maybe one day I will work full time, but I do not have a plan to work currently
3. The litigation is stressful and how can I ever work a full time job when I am constantly having to reply to motions or talk to CAS

also elaborated on she can't work because of the child care needs...but does not provide specifics, kids are in school fulltime. Also states that I should work more reasonable hours (I work 40 hours a week)


regarding number 3...I have done 6 motions in 3 years, 5 of which dealt which child related issues/access. She has brought 3 all ex-parte to try and get money.
The point I would make on this last one..maybe if you listened to all the judges who told you to facilitate access..he would not have needed to litigate

Last edited by Kkc; 11-10-2021 at 12:04 PM.
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