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Parental child abduction: Where family law and criminal law intersect

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  • #46
    Originally posted by OntarioDaddyMan View Post
    This is tough. LovingFather32 does the mom suffer from any emotional or mental disorder of any kind and was diagnosed accordingly?


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
    ^^^ Don't go there. Unless you have a recent diagnostic report from a psychologist or other qualified person, AND strong evidence (not just speculation) that this condition impairs the mother's ability to parent, no one will care about your opinion of your ex's mental health. Judges are used to people who think their ex is crazy, mentally ill, unbalanced, etc.

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    • #47
      Originally posted by stripes View Post
      ^^^ Don't go there. Unless you have a recent diagnostic report from a psychologist or other qualified person, AND strong evidence (not just speculation) that this condition impairs the mother's ability to parent, no one will care about your opinion of your ex's mental health. Judges are used to people who think their ex is crazy, mentally ill, unbalanced, etc.
      I was inquiring for the sake of inquiring that's all. I understand what you mean and Im going through that now. I just figured that if she did what she did on a whim then there might be something wrong with her.

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      • #48
        Originally posted by stripes View Post
        ^^^ Don't go there. Unless you have a recent diagnostic report from a psychologist or other qualified person, AND strong evidence (not just speculation) that this condition impairs the mother's ability to parent, no one will care about your opinion of your ex's mental health. Judges are used to people who think their ex is crazy, mentally ill, unbalanced, etc.
        Good advice - fact is everyone acts crazy during a divorce - nothing new as far as Judge's are concerned. Unless your ex shows serious mental instability that goes beyond 'garden variety' nutjob - there's no point in pursuing that venue. Stick with the facts:

        - you are being denied access to your child since (date)
        - you want access to your child (immediately)

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        • #49
          Janibel. I would be willing to make the 2 hour drive every week if it meant joint week-about custody. I don't think shes living there per se. Just staying at her moms.

          When her father left her mother her mother suffered major depression. The ex lost most her teenagehood taking care of her, eventually being diagnosed with depression and being heavily medicated herself. Shes dealt with bouts of depression our whole relationship. I suspected post partum as there was rapid weight loss, loss in pleasure, insomnia and a very flat affect. I put my concerns about depression in my application for custody. She of course says it was the relationship making her that way. Also, her mother was the ruler of our relationship. Once we moved to ON and became pregnant it was all downhill. Her mom asked her to abort, became very jealous of me and my extended family (who were also in ON) and alienated me from their family. Kidling came to me a day before they left and said "mamey says no boys allowed at her house". I confronted her via text (still have it). This means patental alienation is already occuring. Simply put .. her mother hates men, yet doesnt work or drive and is supported by one. Can we see a trend? Silent treatments were given for weeks to the ex by her mom . This is when depression would arise. So yes .. there is depression but its not easy to prove. Assessments are costly and lengthy too I hear.

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          • #50
            Originally posted by LovingFather32 View Post
            Janibel. I would be willing to make the 2 hour drive every week if it meant joint week-about custody. I don't think shes living there per se. Just staying at her moms.

            There's a good option to propose in court ^^^ proves your willingness to do what you can to spend time with your child. Complaining and mud-slinging won't help - suggesting a workable plan will.

            When her father left her mother her mother suffered major depression. The ex lost most her teenagehood taking care of her, eventually being diagnosed with depression and being heavily medicated herself. Shes dealt with bouts of depression our whole relationship. I suspected post partum as there was rapid weight loss, loss in pleasure, insomnia and a very flat affect. I put my concerns about depression in my application for custody. She of course says it was the relationship making her that way.
            As many of us have suggested to you, unless she is what would be considered an unfit parent, there's no point in bringing that up. Plenty of parents have depressions - although not the perfect scenario, they are still able to care for their children. Being depressed does not equal abuse or neglect. That has to be proven and the threshold is high.

            Also, her mother was the ruler of our relationship. Once we moved to ON and became pregnant it was all downhill. Her mom asked her to abort, became very jealous of me and my extended family (who were also in ON) and alienated me from their family. Kidling came to me a day before they left and said "mamey says no boys allowed at her house". I confronted her via text (still have it). This means patental alienation is already occuring. Simply put .. her mother hates men, yet doesnt work or drive and is supported by one.
            Here again, it is unfortunate to have these negative influences, but the extended family is not the issue here, nor will that be relevant in court.

            Can we see a trend? Silent treatments were given for weeks to the ex by her mom . This is when depression would arise. So yes .. there is depression but its not easy to prove. Assessments are costly and lengthy too I hear.
            You don't need to prove depression, that won't help your case. Neglect or abuse is all the courts will be interested in and that must be clearly documented.

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            • #51
              I know of a few cases where no support was awarded because of the financial costs a parent had traveling to see the child....so if an ex thinks that by going to another jurisdiction with a child is going to win them money... it won't...also I think the Court house where an "action" is started is the Cout House were the ex has to keep traveling back to ...to appear..unless it's agreed to teleconferences...not for a trial though.

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              • #52
                Im hoping this wont enter trial. Doesn't legal aid have some sort of $ cap? If so, wouldn't they encourage their client to settle instead of fight?
                This is how I see my EM playing out. Judge won't grant the week-about but will grant me some sort of access, such as once per week. I will still consider that a victory. I have to start somewhere. I really cant see the judge agreeing that our daughter shouldn't see her father. Im not Hannibal Lector here. No police involvement for entirety of 8 year relationship. No charges, etc. It will have been over 2 months come the EM on May 1st. I will have 5 minutes or so to prove my case....denying the garbage. If anyone's been following my story, they know I'm child-focused, settlement-focused and will bend over backwards for access at this point.

                Mr. Toronto was kind enough to offer this very similar case:
                CanLII - 2006 CanLII 15312 (ON SC)

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