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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #11  
Old 12-08-2018, 07:07 PM
tunnelight tunnelight is offline
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Originally Posted by kate331 View Post
I think my ex will argue, its on my time, my problem. And so far he hasn't consented to it, but as I said before, I am going to do it regardless of him consenting.
That's not very good co-parenting. I think your ex will rather argue that you made the decision unilaterally and just expect him to pay.

Last edited by tunnelight; 12-08-2018 at 07:23 PM.
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  #12  
Old 12-08-2018, 09:02 PM
kate331 kate331 is offline
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More like she sent him an email about this program that the child has to miss school to attend, and he hasn't provided his view yet.
Yes, thats exactly it! I sent him an email 2 weeks ago after he failed to attend a school conference to discuss a plan too try and keep child in the classroom. As you can imagine its difficult to make decisions, when you only hear my take on the situation instead of attending the meetings in person.

Alternatively, as the school has suggested a half day program may be more suitable for the child. Maybe he could stay home with the child instead???

Last edited by kate331; 12-08-2018 at 09:09 PM.
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  #13  
Old 12-08-2018, 09:09 PM
kate331 kate331 is offline
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That's not very good co-parenting. I think your ex will rather argue that you made the decision unilaterally and just expect him to pay.
He can argue that to a Judge. I'm done with the co-parenting! He's welcome anytime to take the kids full-time, so I can be an EOW parent and I will gladly pay cs and Section 7. Or alternately I'd take a 50/50 split in a heartbeat.

Quite frankly I could use the break!
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  #14  
Old 12-09-2018, 10:02 AM
tunnelight tunnelight is offline
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He can argue that to a Judge. I'm done with the co-parenting! He's welcome anytime to take the kids full-time, so I can be an EOW parent and I will gladly pay cs and Section 7. Or alternately I'd take a 50/50 split in a heartbeat.

Quite frankly I could use the break!
I hear you but 50.50 is easier said than done without cooperation.
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  #15  
Old 12-09-2018, 10:11 AM
tunnelight tunnelight is offline
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Alternatively, as the school has suggested a half day program may be more suitable for the child. Maybe he could stay home with the child instead???
Again, you can't throw him under the bus like that and expect him to pay. The only thing that will do is create more conflict.

Maybe the two of you could look into a school with on site therapy?

Maybe you can work part time instead of full time ?

Maybe you can ask your lawyer to follow up with his and see what their position is?

Maybe grandma can help?

Last edited by tunnelight; 12-09-2018 at 10:22 AM.
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  #16  
Old 12-09-2018, 11:29 AM
kate331 kate331 is offline
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I hear you but 50.50 is easier said than done without cooperation.
I dont think it will every happen for us. But until we reach a settlement I'm keeping it on the table. Good point on the cooperation! My lawyer is pretty confident the therapies can be court ordered. I like to use this forum as sort of a meter, too see if I'm asking for too much, then I decide if its worth asking my lawyer in order to save legal fees. I walk a fine line, if I piss my ex off too much, he could simply skip town.

Do you have 50/50? How is the communication between you and your ex? Workable?
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  #17  
Old 12-09-2018, 11:42 AM
kate331 kate331 is offline
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Originally Posted by tunnelight View Post
Again, you can't throw him under the bus like that and expect him to pay. The only thing that will do is create more conflict.

Maybe the two of you could look into a school with on site therapy?

Maybe you can work part time instead of full time ?

Maybe you can ask your lawyer to follow up with his and see what their position is?

Maybe grandma can help?
I agree Tunenelight that it is creating alot of conflict. Yes, there are alternative schools that offer a more therapeutic program, but my ex is adamant the child stays in the mainstream school and I would like that too. I do see this in the future, but right now I am working the steps i.e. therapy to try and keep him in his neighbourhood school and so is the school board. This isnt our first rodeo, other S8 has been in a therapeutic school for 4 years.

Why should I give up my families financial future, because my ex wont take the kids more, or contribute financial for extra help? Then that bring SS into the picture, no way he's going to agree to that. And quite frankly he doesnt make enough money to pay both.

Their position based on the previous argument over speech therapy, is as long as it doesn't interfere with his time and not on his dime, hes fine with it. That goes for any extracurricular programs such as swimming lessons.

Of course Grandma will come to rescue, like she always does to pick up the slack. The burn out rate for caregivers is high and Grandma isnt an exception. These children also have a family on their paternal side. Alternately why cant ex's partner help out, she currently doesnt work
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  #18  
Old 12-09-2018, 01:30 PM
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Janus Janus is offline
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There is a common theme to your posts, and that is you are always hoping that your ex will step up and provide something more than money, and he never does. I'm not sure why you expect that to ever change...
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  #19  
Old 12-09-2018, 02:04 PM
kate331 kate331 is offline
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There is a common theme to your posts, and that is you are always hoping that your ex will step up and provide something more than money, and he never does. I'm not sure why you expect that to ever change...
True, but while this inches its way through the court system I feel I should give him alternatives to just paying.

I did end up getting the Christmas Holiday split at the TBST (either take the kids or pay Grandma). So sometimes it does go my way .
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