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Common Law Issues The law regarding common law relationships is different than in cases of divorce. Discuss the issues that affect unmarried couples here.

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Old 05-14-2007, 07:00 PM
confused and mad confused and mad is offline
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Default Just a few questions for those who may know!

I am a recently split dad of two, I have thr primary of one child from a previous relationship and have had that since 2000. My second child was born in December and her nother and I were engaged but the whole "dont want to be a step-parent" killed our relationship.

I have obtained counsel and from what I hear he is veru diligent in what he does but my concerns are vast with this mother and I dont know who to convey them without getting my ass into trouble. My ex has a history as well as her entire family of alcohol abuse, this caused numerous problems and to say the least my ex is a party person and likes to go out all the time and drink and well do the guys that come with it.

I have advised my lawyer right now of my concerns and they have gone into my affidavit and she doesnt dispute anything but hold on Im under a denial to see my child. This is the 3rd denial in the last 8 weeks and to say the least we had a cort date set that was adjourned and now set for this week. It is a horrbile position to be in being under a denial and not even having the access to your parental rights to your child. My ex doesnt even dispute the fact she denied me over $$$$, its ridiculous than she came up with an allegation I have kicked my son in the bum and well called him stupid, hence now she is requiring an assessment to be done.

6 weeks after the split she is now ****** a guy in our house with my daughter there but how do i even convey that I know. This "stalking thing" I have read about and does going by my house 2 times in 4 weeks consitute a charge? I was told by my lawyer that they have no case, well a lawyer will tell you what you want to hear and Im aware of this, but in reality they have no case. I moved my entire office to accomodate the day to day care of my little one during the week, this was in fact an arrangement set and agreed even before this child was born. For 5 weeks I provided the case on a daily basis of my daughter and she even took off for business for 5 days and left the baby in my care, not a problem, but when she got back and saw that I had secured on the house title she denied me, not only did she deny me, her parents issued a threat to me via email the same day.

How the hell do people get away with this, I would like to know or can this come back and kick her in the ass? I am still awaiting the return of my access and on her family court documents she agrees with joint/shared down the board other than the access time. A stable dad who has raised a child for the last 7 years as the primary and a mother who drinks ridicuosly and is plugging guys right away, how once again do i look like a shit here.

Anyways I was told to fight and I am, i have documented everything and have all the evidence in this case, she has nothing other than 3 allegations in which I dispute. Is it possible the "staus quo" will be returned to me based on the fact she hasnt disputed anything? All i want is to be a parent to my child, who the hell can be a parent to a 5 month old every second weekend as well not only that she has taken the eldest child away from her sibling.

Any replies would be great

Last edited by logicalvelocity; 05-14-2007 at 10:03 PM.
Old 05-14-2007, 10:02 PM
logicalvelocity logicalvelocity is offline
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confused and mad,

welcome to the forum,

There is an old saying - if you give someone enough rope they will hang themselves. What I mean is -- If the parent's conduct is more centered on partying and flavor of the week, this in itself suggests that the home for the child may not be stable and the individual may not be capable to parent the child effectively. It is irrelevant to the situation at hand who your ex may be seeing or not seeing. However, in a custody adjudication other people that live in the home will be considered. See the best interest test that must be applied by the courts.

Section 24 (1), (2), (3) and (4) of the Children's Law Reform Act R.S.O. 1990 c. C.12 as listed:

Bond and stability are also critical factors in a custody adjudication. If legal action is pursued and if it was myself I would be asking for sole custody to keep the siblings together with consideration of what may be going on in that home.

Focus your stance on the child's best interest rather than what she may be doing. Be calm cool and collective at all times when dealing with your ex as everything you do or say will be under the microscope.

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