Ottawa Divorce .com Forums


User CP

New posts

Advertising

  Ottawa Divorce .com Forums > Main Category > Parenting Issues

Parenting Issues This forum is for discussing any of the parenting issues involved in your divorce, including parenting of step-children.

Reply
 
Thread Tools
  #1  
Old 05-01-2016, 04:38 PM
momof2teenboys momof2teenboys is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 116
momof2teenboys is on a distinguished road
Default Dad left him at a fast food restaurant...

WTF?? Parenting schedule is eow and it was his weekend. Pick up friday at 5pm and drop off sunday at 5pm.

I'm starting to think he really has no clue....We've been doing this schedule for 2 years. But more and more often he's been picking up late and today I get a call from DS14 that he's sitting at a fast food place and needs me to come and get him. 5 hours early! No call from his dad - DS just said his dad made other plans and needed to drop him off early...DS didn't have his key with him so he left him at the local McDs. I was over an hour away so told DS to call his dad back and have him pick him up. Poor kid - he didn't want to in case it made his dad mad.

I never thought I would have to deal with crap like this. What can I do?
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 05-01-2016, 04:56 PM
Berner_Faith Berner_Faith is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Ontario
Posts: 3,325
Berner_Faith will become famous soon enough
Default

Ensure he always has a key with him to begin with. At 14 surely he was just fine. Maybe not happy dad left him at McDonalds but I am sure at his age he is out with friends and such all the time and can handle hanging out until you get there or whatever.

If your son was younger I would be more concerned but just make sure he has a key on him or you hide one around your house so he can get in when need be. I would say something to dad hit obviously it won't do any good as he won't listen anyways.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 05-01-2016, 05:15 PM
momof2teenboys momof2teenboys is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 116
momof2teenboys is on a distinguished road
Default

Unfortunately DS blames himself for his dad's shortcomings too.

Yes he has his own key and he would have had it with him if he knew he was coming home to an empty house. He also would have taken his wallet so he could buy himself some lunch as dad left him there without any money.

There's no point in me bringing it up with dad. If he won't listen to his own kid he's certainly not going to listen to me.
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 05-01-2016, 08:05 PM
standing on the sidelines standing on the sidelines is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Kitchener Ontario
Posts: 5,541
standing on the sidelines is on a distinguished road
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by momof2teenboys View Post
Unfortunately DS blames himself for his dad's shortcomings too.

Yes he has his own key and he would have had it with him if he knew he was coming home to an empty house. He also would have taken his wallet so he could buy himself some lunch as dad left him there without any money.

There's no point in me bringing it up with dad. If he won't listen to his own kid he's certainly not going to listen to me.
he should always carry his house key and some cash.
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 05-02-2016, 09:30 AM
LovingFather32's Avatar
LovingFather32 LovingFather32 is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Ottawa
Posts: 4,520
LovingFather32 is an unknown quantity at this point
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by momof2teenboys View Post
Yes he has his own key and he would have had it with him if he knew he was coming home to an empty house.
He should always have his key on him. In case there is an emergency. In this case to be honest .. it sounds like dad may have had a bit of an emergency.

Go over the pick up drop off guidelines with him again (also in cases of immediate emergencies or sudden changes of plan).

I wouldn't go off the deep end with this one. May just inflame matters.
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 05-02-2016, 12:19 PM
momof2teenboys momof2teenboys is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 116
momof2teenboys is on a distinguished road
Default

I'm switching out the front door lockset this week - going to the keypad entry instead. I don't want DS to ever feel like he can't come home.

Emergencies happen - this wasn't an emergency. He had "plans". And he had other options - call or text me (anytime before or over the weekend), call any of the grandparents that all live within 20 minutes of here (DS called my mother and she was headed over to get him when I got there), call any of DSs friends...he had options. And chose to leave him in a fast food restaurant.

I've gone over with DS what he should do if/when this happens again. If he hadn't been able to get a hold of me then he needs to know who else to call. Same as if there is an emergency at home - 911, mom, grandparents, friends...

Emergencies do happen. Things do come up but the parenting plan is clear in what either of us should do if we not be able to care for DS during our time with him. Dropping him at McDs on his own isn't one of them.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 05-02-2016, 12:28 PM
rockscan rockscan is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 4,703
rockscan will become famous soon enough
Default

Your ex is a grade a ass so you cant trust him at all. Make sure your son has a way to get in no matter what. I bet in another year or two the visits will stop and you wont have to worry about this bs.
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 05-02-2016, 01:03 PM
ringettteplayer ringettteplayer is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: ontario
Posts: 421
ringettteplayer is on a distinguished road
Default

Bullshit, i feel for you and your kids, be grateful you don't have to spend your retirement 24/7 with that gem!! Let it go, focus on your kids and what they do, not what that gem does or doesn't do. Free yourself! It's complicated to make plans as you always have to expect this kind of impromptu thing to happen alot. Especially if gem found a human to preoccupy his thoughts. Fair? Nope! Expected? Yup! Chin up held high and reach for the sunshine!! You are free from that!! Enjoy!!!
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 05-02-2016, 01:30 PM
LovingFather32's Avatar
LovingFather32 LovingFather32 is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Ottawa
Posts: 4,520
LovingFather32 is an unknown quantity at this point
Default

No emergency? Yea .. totally douchy......I could never do that to my child.

Ringette is right .... be thankful you dont have to deal with that all day every day nor in your retirement.
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 05-02-2016, 04:41 PM
arabian's Avatar
arabian arabian is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Western Canada
Posts: 10,667
arabian will become famous soon enough
Default

Great idea about changing up the lockset to a keycode one. When my son was young we had a simple keypad entry to garage and then he entered another code to deactivate the security system to house. Never any problems with keys being lost.
Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Concerned about food Dad33 Parenting Issues 11 01-20-2010 06:55 PM
Question about custody, he left, can he do this? Mommabearto2 Parenting Issues 12 12-07-2009 06:18 PM
How to discuss parenting Foredeck Parenting Issues 3 09-14-2009 12:16 PM
nothing left and still wants! Nothing_left Financial Issues 17 08-04-2009 07:07 PM
Left Hook javier cano General Chat 1 07-08-2006 08:51 AM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 04:50 AM.