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Oh sorry. EX-oartner and other half of parenting team abandonned myself and 5 kids in 2009. Little complicated but when i served for custody and support (after searching for months for this person), CAS showed up on my doorstep, false allegations and apprehension ensued. For 3 years of court, i have had to learn the child and Family service Act, the Social Service Act and the Criminal Code of Canada. Mostly i see divorce and family court as not gender specific but rather tageting those who struggle for various and even valid reasons. All these dealings needed use of all the above law acts, someday i hope to be in a better position to help others through canada court watch organization. Mostly i see the government has circumvented their own laws and lawyers (not to be judgemental) in my situation were the enablers to the overbooked courtroom and the financial wheel of destruction to this Ontario family. Actually lawyers dragged things out somewhat and it confirmed that often families are dragged through this to fill others pockets.
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Actually, some women might receive preferential treatment, but it's hard to see. However i am a woman that received prejudicial treatment for quite some time due to misinformation and communication blocks. I buckled down, did my homework, produced the proof expected of me, then got exactly what i deserved. But ultimately, i was working for my children and this family. I got what was deserved because i worked hard & showed honesty & integrity. Legal issues are perceived many ways, bottom line dictates that despite gender, one must work hard and go get it themself without expectation a lawyer will get it for them. It is not gender bias, but intelligence, drive and commitment that works. Anyone who claims their legal issues to be biased by gender, maybe should be in human rights law instead? Just wondering.....Comment
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i will post this in separate topic, i graphed the last published statistics canada data by province of children living with a lone ( divorced, previously common law, single ... ) Female vs a Male , its some what consistent with my personal findings here in Calgary though my numbers for Males with children is lower.
it indicates that women get 80 to 90% of child custody consistently right across Canada - province by province, the more children the higher the %percent of them are with the Female, thats "preferential treatment" !
visit this page to see graphs
http://www.wheretheylie.com/statcan2006.htmComment
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I'm inclined to agree that there is a major gender bias in the family law court system. I'm a stay-at-home dad and the looks I get when I mention it, from the FLIC office staff, right to the judge, are just plain ridiculous. A judge wouldn't look at a woman like she was nuts if she told him she was a stay-at-home parent, but that's exactly what happens to me every single time. Even worse, it states right in my court materials that I'm a stay-at-home parent, so the judges surprise when it's mentioned in the courtroom just goes to show how frequently judges don't familiarize themselves with the materials beforehand. My ex had legal aid representation when we attended court last summer. Her lawyer spent 20 minutes talking to the judge before we were heard, and the first thing the judge did after the proceedings began, was begin reading his order. No discussion whatsoever. I had to ask him whether he was even going to consider anything I had to say, or if he was simply going to continue reading out an edict based solely on the information provided to him by my ex's lawyer. It was completely the most ridiculous thing I've ever seen. It was almost 6 o'clock and the judge actually said that if he took the time to listen to me (and others like me), that he'd be in night court every night. Apparently my son's best interests weren't worth taking 15 minutes to review my materials and another few minutes seeking any clarification he may have needed from me.
Also, after being denied access to my son for a month and a half, I had to file an emergency motion asking that access be enforced and that make-up time for the access missed be granted. I missed 4 weekends with my son, the judge ordered one make-up weekend, even though my ex provided no good reason for denying the access. Enforcement wasn't granted, even though my ex has another child with another man, who does have an enforcement clause because of how often he's been denied access to his daughter. Apparently her proven record of access denial with her other ex wasn't relevant, even though she was displaying the same behaviours with me. Further, the motion cost me nearly $3000 and the judge ordered costs in the amount of $500. In no way was I in the wrong, yet I have to pay for her contempt of court.
If the system wasn't biased, would we really be hearing such a disproportionate number of allegations of bias from men? I doubt it.Comment
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Your stated percentages are useless with respect to 'preferential treatment'.Originally posted by pokeman View Post
The percentage of women who have custody in the case where the men pursue custody, that might be relevant. Simply stating child custody with women, not so much.Comment
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unfortunately, i'm inclined to agree to a certain extent with billm. however, a lot of men probably don't even bother seeking custody, because of how widely it is believed that the courts have a gender bias. by employing a bias, or even just appearing to, the courts actually dissuade those they're (allegedly) biased against from even trying.Comment
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howl, too funny - here we have real numbers that show women have 80 to 90% custody, period , real numbers from statistics canada ...
billm your speculating that fathers may or may not persue custody so the numbers are useless, thats a f@rt in the wind arguement that can never be proved or not ...
the facts stand - women get 80+ % custody as of 2006 , and having known that 5 years ago i too would not have pumped $160,000 into lawyers pockets thinking I had a chance ...Comment
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that's my point exactly. how many men are gonna spend thousands of dollars on a long shot? how many more men don't have thousands of dollars to spend? equal parenting should be the norm, and if one parent objects to it, then it should be up to them to prove its not in the child's best interests. it shouldn't just automatically be assumed that one parent is better for the kids than the other. no parent should have their role in their children's life reduced to that of occasional babysitter, unless there's a damn good reason to do so. children need their fathers every bit as much as they need their mothers. it's funny that the court doesn't like awarding equal parenting when ex's can't agree. show me a marriage where both parents agree on anything. not agreeing leads to compromise, which typically leads to better choices that all parties can be happy with. just handing the power over to one parent causes much more harm than good.Comment
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I'm not stating that there is no preferential treatment - the courts are not blind to gender, and they should be.Originally posted by pokeman View Post
But the same argument can be applied to your preferential treatment conclusion based simply on a custody statistic. Unless you know what percentage of those cases, the dad wanted custody and was denied, it is a fart in the wind argument, it hold no weight as the statistic you state does not speak to the point of preferential treatment.Comment
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For sure they do!
I actually had a JUDGE tell me flat out that he tends to lean towards women in "these sort of cases".......WTF! It took all my might not to lose it right then and there.Comment
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bigdad 2750
its better when they tell you which way they lean ...
otherwise a 'bizarre decision' will just haunt you (for
years) wondering 'why?' ..
by 'these sorts of cases' I assume you mean wanting fair access to children and/or not being treated like a criminal cause your a man.
a good lawyer would have known the Judges tendancy to lean.
i work in a building with several hundred people, there are more team leads and managers than there are judges in calgary, spend 5 years in the building and you know or can easily find out all you need to know about 'leads' and 'manager' to decide if you want them as a boss ...
same idea with Judges and Lawyers ... its a small world ... your lawyer can put you in front of such a judge and you would never know it ...
so if you had a lawyer considering getting one with a reference
from another man whom believes his lawyer did their best ...
best of luck to youComment
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Unfortunately this "judge" was a civil court judge that heard the case conference and will have absolutely no way of getting in on the actual family court case BUT how can he be so biased and get away with it? Just goes to show the court system is totally on the woman's side.I have been the primary caregiver for the kids,take them to outtings,dance recital,scouts,etc. And I have to prove I am a good dad to some jackoff that doesn't know me from a bum on the street? Unbelievable!Comment
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Biased System
There are limited cases where the system in place actually helps both parents equally strive to live and move on from their divorce or seperation. Where the system is failing is by giving both parents an equal role with the children. Mothers are not the only or primary caregiver to children, the times are changing. Fathers like myself were the primary care giver, the moral support behind the children, the one teaching them life values and sacrificed their own happiness for their family. But the times have changed, there is a loop hole in the system. In 2009 there was a spike in the number of domestic charges being used to gain grounds in Family Court matters. A number of spouses have found a loop hole in the system, and exploiting it to their own benefit. Usually one member charges their spouse with domestic assault, resulting in a charge and arrest. The parent who placed the call automatically gets to stay in the matrimonial home, which leads to custody and other benefits. The Government is now re-training their court judges, JP's, Crown for these situations, and informing both the criminal and family side on how to deal with these situations.
But in the end it, one thing remains the same. Even though you can fight to save your name. Fight for the truth and disclose everything and anything. The court has a blind eye to a mothers/womans lies...Comment
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The court has a blind eye to lies from either gender.The court has a blind eye to a mothers/womans lies...
I would suggest to you that one of the biggest issues in family law is that there is nothing done about falsehoods in affidavits and financial statements.
If you're trying to suggest to me that lying or non-closure is something that only women and get away with...you need to read this forum more because you'll see the multiple stories of women (like me) trying to deal with male ex-spouses doing exactly the same thing.Comment
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You may be right, I'm sure its a two sided coin on the issue of lies. But when it comes to fair treatment in the courts, I don't believe the same story applies. The scales of Justice are not even, and I believe that both parents should be given a fair chance at life and with his children. For those who abuse the system, the abuse should be recognized by the courts and taken into account when making their decision.Originally posted by Pursuinghappiness View PostComment
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